I can't be "just friends" with males and it is ruining me

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I told a guy I don't think I should be his friend because I'm developing feelings and it's hurting our friendship. He went on a date with another woman yesterday and made me feel jealous when in fact a true friend should have been happy for him. After I said that on FB he stopped talking to me (I know him IRL and can't avoid him).

God, I can't keep doing this!! !

Were you feeling anything more than jealousy?

Just thinking that there is a stereotype of folks being jealous of the time their friends spend with new partners... and of new partners being jealous of the time spent with friends.

I had that one when I acquired a girlfriend at age 23: I had one close friend at the time and the two of them developed a serious dislike of each other based on mutual jealousy over me!
Which I found very confusing and weird

Unfortunately we (humans) are, to a degree, selfish creatures: it’s natural to feel jealous of friends time and attention... not good or noble or wise, just natural.

That was my thought also, are you physically attracted to him (not just b/c it's that time of month) or is it a caring loving? Might you be avoiding uncomfortable feelings rather than transforming them?

Apparently I'm the ASD type who is very attached to my friends (regardless of gender). It seems my friends' romantic partners and spouses don't like me. I am annoyed that the partners come first, but I understand. Is that jealousy? When my hormones spike I am sometimes physically attracted to my friends, but it's temporary and I let it pass. My choice is to remain friends. The discomfort surges from time to time, but those waves pass.

Ironically I am having a similar issue with a women's FB group --- I was highly "attached" to the group, but am now uncomfortable from outside stress and I detached (cold turkey). I was messaged recently by a member and am trying to figure out how to "be" there in this vulnerable state. But maybe I don't need the group and it's time to move on? Or maybe it's valuable enough to let this wave of discomfort pass? Which?

Well, we did talk after that and he made it clear he wasn't really interested in the other woman... (She's twice his age for one, she keeps harassing him). But he didn't say anything about being interested in me.

He just wants friends and I guess that's okay.

Ang, did you want to date him before he went on a date with that other woman? If so, did you express this desire to him before the date, as well?

See, he told me there was another girl he was more interested in, but now she is not interested in him... And he didn't seem that upset about it... And the other woman keeps bothering him and he tells me she is bothering him... But what do I do if I wanted a chance?

Edit: and hes having a minor surgery next week and if I'm not sick he wants me to be the person that is with him at the hospital... Is that some sort of strange date?