Ironic

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The most ironic thing happened to me today. I was talking to a girl, and she asked me if I had a girlfriend. When I said no, she first told me she didn't believe me, then that it would be very easy for me to get one. She wasn't hitting on me (she is taken and is not the game-playing or cheating type). The irony is I've been single for years and I've practically given up on having a girlfriend ever, in the rest of my life. What she said both pleased me and depressed me, if that makes any sense.

How long have you been single?

slightly over two years. I have only ever been in one relationship (5 yrs).

How bad was the break-up?

It was pretty tough for me, though it wasn't a high-dramam thing.

why won't you ask a girl that you like on a date then? Sorry to tell you, but there are very few women out there who are willing to initiate things like that, no matter how much they might like you. You have to be the man and initiate it, it's the only way.

Thing is I've had this too, but also been told the opposite. People might say nice things to you when they are already in a relationship or you couldn't be in one with them.

Will get there eventually hopefully.

Why? is the female more inferior than male ? aren't you supposed to be equal to man?

Only the taken girls tell me such crap things , it's just a cliché sentence said during 'side convos' by the taken girls to single male friends(or male colleagues...) ....even tho I never complained about being single to any girl . Don't take it seriously , it doesn't mean anything.

When she tells you this next time just ask her this question : Would you wish to be my gf if you were not taken ?

don't listen to her answer ...just watch her reaction =)

to answer your questions: no; yes;
here is the thing--guys are freaked out by women who take the initiative. this has been my experience. they look at a you in a way that makes you feel worthless. or they say yes, but then they act like a**holes on the date. this has been my experience, so I stopped asking men out. even if a woman is not interested, she will tactfully say no in a way that would not hurt the guy's feelings. men don't do the same.

because all the girls I know that I like are taken, or (in one case) not interested in dating.

Yep. Often, it's just their way of being polite.

However, even when a girl's being totally honest, in telling you that you seem like a really good catch, that does NOT mean she'd date you given the opportunity. People are weird that way. As a literal Aspie, it took me a while to realize this. The reason for the phenomenon is a person's objective opinion of you is not the same as their subjective opinion of you. So, a girl may really, genuinely think you're great, but if there are no sparks between you two, she won't "think of you in that way." Doesn't matter how qualified/datable you may be. The subjective opinion (attraction) has got to be there, or the relationship's dead before it gets started.

yes, this girl is an excellent example of what you're saying. oh well, it's not as if i were the first person ever to survive indefinite celibacy.

Doesn't it also freak some girls out when guys make the move? I mean quite why society has to have rules and bounderies in this sense bewilders and frustrates me...