Please help me

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I've got a friend that I've been Role Playing with for about four or five months. She's NT, and from holland, and two years older than me. But today she told me that she loved me. What the hell do I do? I don't know if she's fallen in love with Purplefluffychainsaw or me, and I don't know if I love her or not. I've fallen in love with many of my friends, somtimes I can't tell the difference between friendship and love anyway. And we both have online boyfriends anyway! Please, please, some advise...?

Even if you are into that kind of thing, it doesn't sound like you know enough about each other and there's also a big geographical distance. Maybe just tell her you don't swing that way but you still want to be her friend?

I think falling in love with someone on the internet is just building up this fantasy person in your mind and having feelings for this ideal that you've created.

Also, being able to "hang out" casually and have physical contact both are impossible on the internet, and those are HUGE parts of a relationship, at least in my opinion.

You could always say something like "You're like a sister to me. I love you too"


GA

purple, i suggest you leave it until you can be absolutely clear and precise about how you feel/what you want, and then let her know.

if you decide you're not interested, you can be gentle but firm with her. i think it's fair to let people know when you're not interested, and i also think it's only fair to be absolutely clear, and not let them harbour any illusions that you MIGHT be interested, not now, and not ever. if that's what you think of course.

keep posting here, and read what others say, and then make up your own mind - as far as you can.

a difficult thing to have to deal with, purple - good luck.

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You're advocating someone have an affair??

Riiight... :: walks away in dismay ::

GA

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Oh, love is friendship to a bigger extent.

I hope someone is not making a false presumption about you. People do that sometimes, I just hope that's not happening to you.

I wish you the best.

Thanks for all the comments, guys! (As you can probably tell, I'm slightly less hysterical today. )

Sean, there's not that big a distance between us. I'm English (sorry, I should have made that clear), so she's closer than my b/friend anyway (he's canadian). I'm bisexual, so I am "into that kind of thing", but I've never actually tried anything with another woman, Michael being my first relationship.

lowfreq50, that's something I thought about when I got together with Michael. But over the internet is the only time anyone's said anything complimentary about me; I just can't cope with talking offline. We talked about this last night as well: I asked her whether she loved Purplefluffychainsaw or Elanor. I don't have the same opinions as you in this matter; I decided that the only problem would be if, like I've just said, they're or I'm different offline than online.

Morlock, I think I've already explained that.

GalileoAce, that's excatly what I would have done, only I'm not sure... This is made even wierder to me by the fact that I've done this to two of my female best friends: fallen in love with them, and then not known what to do because I don't want to lose them as a friend. Luckily, I was able to tell them (the first time over the Internet, and the second time with the advise and suport of my other friends), and we're still friends: I just have to keep my feelings under control. But I know how hard that is, and I don't want Naomi to have to go through that because I'm so unsure.

vetivert, thanks. I wouldn't want to create an illusion, no matter what happens we've said we're going to remain friends, so I don't have to.

AntiEverything and GalileoAve (again ), I don't know my own opinions on having an affair... I'd *never* have a physical relationship with someone behind another partner's back, but over the Internet it's so much more complicated. And as I don't know her b/friend, I wouldn't want to risk her losing him anyway.

larsenjw92286, that's another of my worries. But from what she says she loved me before we were really friends, before I knew her particually well anyway. So I'm not sure where this comes from. What I'm most worried about is that it's from the RPs that we've been doing, as we mostly do romantic ones, but from what she says she's loved me before we started to do romantic ones.


Eventually what happened last night was we decided to stay friends, and just see what happens. I need to find out what I feel for her, and I (feel bad for saying this, but) want to find out whether she really means what she says, even though it does make sense with some of the things that she's done in the past. If you want, I'll keep you updated on what happens.

I think you should just see what happens. You never know until you analyze. Just cherish every moment you know is worth enjoying, and keep a smile on your face.