How long does it take for them to call?

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Cyanide
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31 Jan 2008, 4:10 pm

Yesterday, this girl I've been meaning to talk to for a while in one of my classes started talking to me (to my amazement). We talked for a while..then she mentioned this movie she wanted to see...then when as she was about to get on her bus after class, I said "If you want to see that movie this weekend...." and handed her my number.
How long does it usually take for a girl to call? A few days? A few weeks? Or will she just wait until the weekend to call me since I said "this weekend" ?

It's the first time i've ever given a girl my phone #, so I'm in the dark here. It was weird though, because we just seemed to naturally click. I didn't feel weird talking to her at all, which is very unusual, so I hope this pans out into something...



JerryHatake
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31 Jan 2008, 4:31 pm

I guess it depends on when the girl feels like to call you. Maybe trying to find out times for the movie perhaps.


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gbollard
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31 Jan 2008, 5:44 pm

I suspect that you might have been a little slow. It's a problem for aspies because we often don't react to a conversation until a few minutes later - which is often when we've missed the opportunity.

For next time .......

If she (or another girl) starts talking about seeing a movie, say -

"We could go see it together"
<wait for response - if it's positive, continue - otherwise stop>

"are you free on Saturday, at 6pm"
<don't wait for her to suggest a time, jump in and suggest one, if she's not free, you can say when are you free then?>



LVBen
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31 Jan 2008, 5:54 pm

Cyanide wrote:
Yesterday, this girl I've been meaning to talk to for a while in one of my classes started talking to me (to my amazement). We talked for a while..then she mentioned this movie she wanted to see...then when as she was about to get on her bus after class, I said "If you want to see that movie this weekend...." and handed her my number.
How long does it usually take for a girl to call? A few days? A few weeks? Or will she just wait until the weekend to call me since I said "this weekend" ?

It's the first time i've ever given a girl my phone #, so I'm in the dark here. It was weird though, because we just seemed to naturally click. I didn't feel weird talking to her at all, which is very unusual, so I hope this pans out into something...



Next time, don't give her your number unless she asks for it, ask for her phone number instead!! !! !! ! If she does call, it will probably be pretty quickly. Within a couple of days or so.



0_equals_true
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31 Jan 2008, 6:25 pm

LVBen wrote:
Next time, don't give her your number unless she asks for it, ask for her phone number instead!! !! !! ! If she does call, it will probably be pretty quickly. Within a couple of days or so.

Do you think that is better? Why, because she will refuse if she doesn't want to call? Maybe she is verging on it but is cautious about give her number. Then again what do I know.



LVBen
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31 Jan 2008, 6:53 pm

0_equals_true wrote:
LVBen wrote:
Next time, don't give her your number unless she asks for it, ask for her phone number instead!! !! !! ! If she does call, it will probably be pretty quickly. Within a couple of days or so.

Do you think that is better? Why, because she will refuse if she doesn't want to call? Maybe she is verging on it but is cautious about give her number. Then again what do I know.


Probably the best thing to do would be to exchange both numbers, but if only one number is going to be exchanged, the guy should get the phone number from the girl. It is more socially accepted and also he won't be sitting around wondering if/when she is going to call. Also, people can be anxious about calling someone the first time. She might like him a lot, but never call him because of anxiety or something, and then he'll think she doesn't like him and it could get kind of confusing. If he has her number, then it is all in his control.



0_equals_true
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31 Jan 2008, 7:11 pm

LVBen wrote:
0_equals_true wrote:
LVBen wrote:
Next time, don't give her your number unless she asks for it, ask for her phone number instead!! !! !! ! If she does call, it will probably be pretty quickly. Within a couple of days or so.

Do you think that is better? Why, because she will refuse if she doesn't want to call? Maybe she is verging on it but is cautious about give her number. Then again what do I know.


Probably the best thing to do would be to exchange both numbers, but if only one number is going to be exchanged, the guy should get the phone number from the girl. It is more socially accepted and also he won't be sitting around wondering if/when she is going to call. Also, people can be anxious about calling someone the first time. She might like him a lot, but never call him because of anxiety or something, and then he'll think she doesn't like him and it could get kind of confusing. If he has her number, then it is all in his control.


Ok I see that POV.

The way I see it she express an interest in a movie, not explicitly him going with her. Therefore it is he who want her to call him. So therefore he should give his number.

I'm not sure what is socially accepted in the UK, it might be a bit different that the US. I never thought it was such a big deal either way, though one might be more fruitful.

I



Cyanide
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31 Jan 2008, 7:12 pm

LVBen wrote:
Next time, don't give her your number unless she asks for it, ask for her phone number instead!! !! !! ! If she does call, it will probably be pretty quickly. Within a couple of days or so.


I've learned that a lot of women are intimidated by having someone know their contact information when they don't know the man's.

LVBen wrote:
Probably the best thing to do would be to exchange both numbers, but if only one number is going to be exchanged, the guy should get the phone number from the girl. It is more socially accepted and also he won't be sitting around wondering if/when she is going to call. Also, people can be anxious about calling someone the first time. She might like him a lot, but never call him because of anxiety or something, and then he'll think she doesn't like him and it could get kind of confusing. If he has her number, then it is all in his control.

You gave me a good idea here. I have class with her tomorrow (every Monday/Wednesday/Friday), and we're always both there half an hour before it starts. I may try and get her to give me her phone number too...but probably not by directly asking for it...



ja
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31 Jan 2008, 8:12 pm

get some other chix number
ask the other chick to the movie

if girlA, says 'wait, I thought we were gonna go?'
you say 'I'm sorry -- I thought you blew me off. I really want to see you this weekend. Let's watch the SuperBowl on Sunday. Come over my house at 6. Give me your number'.



GrantZilla
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31 Jan 2008, 8:34 pm

LVBen is correct. Women want a guy that takes charge, it shows confidence.

Few girls beleive a guy is going to just sit around and wait for them to call. If they do, then they probably think your pathetic.

If you do get a girl's number, DO NOT call them right away. That reeks of desperation. Call them maybe the night before the movie. Also, don't ask "do you still want to go to the movie." Instead, go "The movie starts at 5:00, so how about I pick you up at 4:30." Again, it's a take charge, confidence thing.

IF she rejects you and, and says, "well, I'm not in the mood to do anything tonight," then politelly tell her to give you a call if she ever does get in the mood, and end it. The ball is now in her court, and either she will get back to you or she won't. But don't dwell over it if she doesn't. There will always bee someone else.



jkrane
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03 Feb 2008, 12:34 am

Chances are that she'll forget, because chicks forget. That's how it works. You can't really "remind" her to call you because then she's gonna think ur needy :roll: .

...oh well...

If she calls you it would be a f*****g miracle.

Girls NEVER call. It's not that they don't want to, it's just that with their emotions and their hysteria and spur of the moment s**t, they just forget. And then there is nothing you can do about it.

Lesson learned!

Next time, get the girl's phone number. That way...oh i don't know where the hell I'm going with this.

Just roll a f*****g dice. 1, 2 or 3 she'll call you. 4, 5, or 6 she'll forget.

It's as simple as that.

People and logic don't mix. People (especially girls) work with randomness and chance. Absolute f*****g make-belief BS



lovebat
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03 Feb 2008, 9:31 am

jkrane wrote:
Chances are that she'll forget, because chicks forget. That's how it works. You can't really "remind" her to call you because then she's gonna think ur needy :roll: .

...oh well...

If she calls you it would be a f***ing miracle.

Girls NEVER call. It's not that they don't want to, it's just that with their emotions and their hysteria and spur of the moment sh**, they just forget. And then there is nothing you can do about it.

Lesson learned!

Next time, get the girl's phone number.


What jkrane is saying is pretty much right up through this part, but then it takes a turn for the rageful and most likely would be considered offensive to someone less sexist than I am. However I laughed heartily. :lol:

But seriously, you've gotta get her number because if she's shy she'll be too nervous to call and if she isn't too shy then she's already asked ten other people to go see it.



juliekitty
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03 Feb 2008, 2:15 pm

A lot of women (like me) don't call men.

There aren't many who refuse to be called by men.

So it's better to get her number.



Caravaggio
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03 Feb 2008, 9:24 pm

I've found my female friends just don't call people unless they're damn well determined to do so. They allow things to get in their way and just push it and push it until either they forget or it's too late and there just isn't a perceived point to calling (their words for the most part).



Jacobison
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04 Feb 2008, 9:00 am

You get her number and call her first, basically what everyone posted before me.



LVBen
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04 Feb 2008, 6:34 pm

Cyanide wrote:
Yesterday, this girl I've been meaning to talk to for a while in one of my classes started talking to me (to my amazement). We talked for a while..then she mentioned this movie she wanted to see...then when as she was about to get on her bus after class, I said "If you want to see that movie this weekend...." and handed her my number.
How long does it usually take for a girl to call? A few days? A few weeks? Or will she just wait until the weekend to call me since I said "this weekend" ?

It's the first time i've ever given a girl my phone #, so I'm in the dark here. It was weird though, because we just seemed to naturally click. I didn't feel weird talking to her at all, which is very unusual, so I hope this pans out into something...



So, did she call you or what?