Adventures in small talk.

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My attempts at work this morning.

To one girl (who had a minor collision in a car, who I thought I was on goods terms with) "Hi, are you feeling better after Monday?"

Looks dead ahead with a moody expression and ignores me, walking right past. And before anyone asks, she did hear me. It was a blatant blank.

To another girl (Who I'm not so familiar with)

"Hi, enjoy your few days off work?"

She replies "Yes."

"So, did you go back down to Cornwall, to see your parents?"

She replies "Yes."

What chance do I stand when I work with such a**holes?

My opinion on small talk: avoid, avoid, avoid

Yes, it can only lead to big talk. And we don't want that, do we?

Problem is, I like people, I'm interested in them and want to fit in.

It's like I get the middle finger all the time for no reason.

You didn't do anything wrong. What you said was normal everyday small talk. Why they were being such asshats I don't know.

I feel I'm just not built for it, trying is completely useless, you don't ask a car to fly, faking it results in tiredness and doesn' generate a good impression on the other. The only thing similar to small talk I can manage is turning the conversation into a flow of dark jokes, but it only works with some people.

Maybe they suck at it too. My mom says lot of people aren't good at it.

I think they're just rude. They should've at least answered you properly instead of shrugging you off like that. How mean! =( I try to do that too, especially when I meet a guy I like, or a guy at work that I kinda like, he just goes "yea" "uh huh" and that's about all I get.

Seems like normal enough chit-chat, not sure why they behaved that way.

Only thing I could say is maybe you've already come across as "strange" or "weird" in the past, and trying to make small talk with them might make them uncomfortable and/or annoyed since they would want to avoid having to associate with you. Maybe you have incorrect/inappropriate body language too.

I have never met one person who hasn't been able to do small talk.

Some people just aren't in the mood for it at a given time. They may be very busy or stressed, or focusing on something.

As for small talk, basic courtesies are easy as long as you make it a point to remember something about the person. You must make it a point to remember some detail to ask them about later. I used to be particularly bad about not remembering names or even people who'd I'd met but who didn't make an impression on me. I'd meet them again later but wouldn't really remember them. I eventually learned to pay more attention to people I interacted with. I still can't really do small talk beyond a few basic courtesies or details I've remembered, though, so it's still effectively canned responses.

One of us attempting small talk is like a computer without a graphics card trying to play Crysis. If only they made add-on cards to put in your head...

so true

at least people don't jump up terrified when you open your mouth lol. I had that happen to me a few times in my new job.

Oh, that's happened to me before (more than once). I finally decide to say something, everybody just stares at me with looks of shock and awe on their faces and somebody says "He spoke...". Gee, what a great way to make me feel comfortable contributing to the conversation in the future...

No, they can talk the hind legs off a donkey with everyone else.

Maybe that's how they got so good at it. Have you tried practicing on a donkey?

The only time I really encounter small talk anymore is in the checkout line at the store, although I've learned which cashiers are the chatty ones and avoid them. But prior to that, I was buying some stuff at Wal-Mart, including a tub of butter and some sticks of butter. The cashier said "Wow, somebody likes butter, don't they?". I thought she was calling me fat and just smiled a Sheldon-like smile and moved on. When I related this story to my wife, she told me I should have told her (the cashier) that I was baking that day and that's what all the butter was for (which it was). It never occured to me that this was the appropriate response. Why didn't the cashier ask a question about the butter rather than make a bizarre, unfounded statement about my love of butter?

Here's a possible suggestion for you guys: A buddy of mine suggested using less "yes or no" questions, and instead using questions that require a more articulate response. It makes it somewhat harder for them to just shrug you off if you're actually showing more interest in what they're doing, at least I'm pretty sure that's the idea.