What are excuses when someone wasn't inviting you?

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It depends on number 7 is used. For instance, the girl who used it with me constantly made excuses with me all time time. When I asked why I was not invited it sounded like an excuse.

Excuses are usually used so as to spare someone's feelings. "I don't want you to ruin my event" sounds like it's said to deliberatelt hurt someone's feelings.
It's similar to how "You can't come to my party because I don't like you" is not an excuse.

Something like this happened to a friend of mine, she told me that her and 3 other friends were on Facebook in a group chat. Things started to get suspicious when they all said they had to leave at the same time, they made excuses like "I have to go shopping with my mom", or "I have to go help my dad".

It turns out that they met up at the Starbucks by her house WITHOUT HER and she walked by and saw them and got really upset. She told me that they didn't even have an excuse. I started to feel bad cuz I had seen them there earlier when I walked past there, but I didn't know they were her friends. She is still friends with one of them today.

I have heard lots of stories like the one that Anna_K was just describing. I cannot stand circumstances like that.


What about excuses where people who are supposed to be our close friends leave us out with these kinds?

1. I was going to talk to my friend about us getting together but both of her ex boyfriends were there at the same time?
2. I did not mean to leave you out but it was sort of last minute. I know that the other people wanted to get to know you.

I have had people say
"Well I wanted to get together with you but I had to ask the other people first and they said no. They thought you would be too hard to handle."

Other times:
"I guess I did not even think about you.":
"I didn't know you were going to get here so early. Otherwise me and my other friend would have included you for lunch."

I heard some amazing excuses on my birthday each year. Mine is in the middle of winter and everyone else at a different time when it is warmer. Amazing thing is everyone wants to invite me to their party, but they don't want to come to mine. What I have heard.

1. "It's too cold" (kind of obvious)
2. "There is too much snow" (a big piss off if people went to another birthday party prior in a snowstorm worse than what we got on my bday)
3. We can't make it. I'm working that night, everyone else is out of town, and another is on date night." Guess what happened when I ended up at a certain bar that night? I saw all the people that were making excuses not to celebrate. Only one person there was polite enough to even say "Happy bday." I left.
on a side note to this example: Guess what happens when you confront people on their lies? They often justify their actions and make it clear they don't care how you feel about it. (the people that clearly don't respect you will do this). In fact, it would be your fault that they lied to you in some instances.

I have heard some of the excuses mentioned throughout this thread. A lot of these instances involved an old friend who was dating a lady that really didn't like me. Excuses not to hang out were consistent and frequent.

I have heard these excuses when I ask if someone wants to get together

A friend and her family talked about me going camping with them on the 4th about 20 years ago. Her mother tried to lead me around by making an excuse with my mother. "My husband has to work all weekend and I would be there all alone with three kids."

I learned it was a lie because I learned he slept over during the nights and worked during one of the days. My mom also volunteered to stay over. We caught her mom in a vicious lie and so she was rude the entire time.

There was another time before that where I was planning on spending the night at their house. I called up to confirm if I was still on with her step father. He brushed me off with "Yeah we know you are coming. I will have your friend call you tonight."

Several hours later my the phone rang and I picked up and I was excited to talk to my friend. I picked up the receiver and it was friend alright. She seemed very distant and short.

The conversation went like this:
( I will use my nick name and one for her)

Kitty: Summer I'm not grounded or anything but my grandparents are here
I froze listening to Kitty
Kitty: Bye "Click."

I walked away from the phone having a meltdown because my routine got interrupted.

that's just awful, those clearly aren't your friends and you are much better off without them. i hope your next birthday is/was better.

I was going to say.

I had something similar happen with me where I had a house warming party about 4 years ago and I invited everyone from work. Sadly none of them came or even got me so much as a card or a present. Yet when I was invited to their things I attended on most occasions and enjoyed myself. What was worse is that the owner of the company would often get other co-workers gifts and cards for
1. When they were leaving the company and moving on with their lives
2. Weddings
3. House warming parties
4. New born babies

She also attended just about everyone else's events too. This is while I got left out.

I live a good half hour from the warehouse and she used this as an excuse. "I don't do things that are far away."



One person said he was coming but he never came because he supposedly forgot. Another girl who never really liked me led me around about coming. She also never showed up for called.

"Well we were going to come but I was upset about my granny being in the hospital. So me and my husband decided to take a short drive first and then show up. We just kept on driving and ended up in going out of town for the weekend."

Of course she befriend another co-worker and tried to isolate me from her by spreading vicious gossip. She also said that she never planned on going to my house warming party because I am a gross person who stinks up the bathroom with expensive detoxes programs.

She also evidently made fun of the fact that the other co-workers refused to come to my events.