Responding to "Hi, How Are You?"

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Often to my annoyance when someone asks me this, I simply say "Fine thanks" and forget to say "How are you?" back, then realise my mistake afterwards and chastise myself.

With people I know, I am more "normal" in regards to greetings. Strangers? I usually either ignore, or respond with meh, whatev/whatever, fine, ok, or dunno. I didnt take much s**t for it though, other than when I first got hired at my previous job. (I just walked in and started working, wouldnt acknowledge anyone.)

Me too. It's because you were taught that in the other language u use that rule when someone says "como estas" and you say "muy bien y tu"......I do that. It's kinda in my head now. It's more like acting than actually speaking.

I usually reply with something along the lines of "I'm alright I guess, how about you?" asking them back how they are can sometimes be tough, but it does boost a little confidence in me when people know that I want to carry out a conversation other than just being a shy-guy no one really seems to bother.

For me that question can elicit too much thought for a timely response. Usually a "fine", "ok", "good", or "great" will do, though. I just forget to ask the question back, much of the time..

I told a friend I never really know what to say when asked 'how are you?' She said she felt the same way, so I proposed that we instead ask, "How am I?", giving the other person a chance to either say something cute or possibly insightful.

hmmm, thats a unique twist on the whole situation.

I usually just respond with a nod and a grunt of acknowledgement. If they persist, I'll just nod again, mumble something, and walk off.

Well that is another way I tend to handle it. That or just say whatever :3

Of course, I always forget to say "How are you" back to them, and end up saying it after a long pause, which makes me seem kind of stupid.
I'd much prefer, however, if after I had said how are you, they would respond with something moderately interesting. Then it could lead to more conversation (this is only when I am in a sociable mood, however). the whole "Hi how are you fine how are you fine" is kind of a dead end.
My challenge for you is: think of some interesting responses to "How are you?"

Sometimes I just say simply "Hi" without thinking about it, other times I say "Good. You?" The latter usually works pretty well from my experience...

No, you say "Fine, and you?"

By the way......DUH.

One of my standard responses is 'tall' (I'm male and 5'10"). This causes some people to become confused and disoriented. Well, now they know how I feel when someone asks me that!

When I don't feel like going there but I have enough energy to do more than nod and grunt, I say "Well enough".

I (usually) know that the expected response is 'fine' or 'good' or somesuch, but I just can't bring myself to say it. It feels coercive, like when a playground bully makes a smaller child say 'Uncle'. Like I would be accepting a humiliating defeat if I gave the expected response. Does that make sense?

Yeah I hate it when people say it. It's kind of pointless because you're just going to say "good" or "fine" or "okay". And also NT's ask when there's little time to give a max of 5 words when you answer. And they expect you to ask back when they'll just say "good" or "fine" or "okay" as well. It's just so pointless and annoying.

I don't. I feel like "how are you" thrown in with a "hi" or "hello" is just enhancing the greeting so I'll either just say nothing or respond with the knee-jerk "good thank you, and you?"... at least the latter will score me points if I'm in the mood for it.
Otherwise, if someone were to ask after my current state of affairs and sound like they really mean it I would give the answer some real thought.

Until I joined this forum I never knew I was supposed to ask it back. I didn't and still don't. I don't care how they are and they probably aren't really going to tell me anyways.

My mom reminds me of this social que and reinforces it nearly every day.

"Hi *****, how are you today?"
"I'm fine, how are you?"

It's routine now, but I don't always remember to do it with other people.