Anyone here who is considered poor?

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I don't really consider myself poor but I do live within a tight budget. I only afford what I need and even then I try and keep it at a minimum. I've never been comfortable in telling people how much I make or what I do for a living.

I've had people ask me the magic question "why?" I really don't know how to answer that. What pisses me off though is whenever I try to make friends with anyone they notice what I don't have. Here's a few examples: Cable, air conditioning, mobile phone, pretty clothes, mp3 player, Wii games...and there's more but I'd rather not bother sharing. It's as if aspergers doesn't come close to weird as the way I live my lifestyle.

Whenever anyone asks me to go shopping, go to a casino or hang out in a restaurant I hesitate mainly because I can't afford it. Even when I do hang out with them, there's always this stupid issues about money. "You should get a debit card or you should do this or you should do that. I get so sick of it. Why do humans have to define friendship or relationships on wealth and status?

I just don't get it.... >_<

Last edited by MissConstrue on 05 Jul 2010, 7:27 am, edited 1 time in total.

deleted.

I don't indulge in any of the normal indulgences of our culture, though I probably could to a small degree. I like 2nd hand clothes and 2nd hand books. I don't really want to hang out with the kind of people who will reject me because I don't have a cell phone. Maybe you aren't meeting the right sort of people for you.

MissC, I assume by the "magic question 'why?' ", you mean "why don't you have X" or "why don't you do X". If you want to be polite, try saying something vague like "Yeah, I'll have to think about it", or "Yeah, I'll have to look into getting one".

Anyway, I earn just enough to get by. I try to keep my contact with the other humans to a minimum, precisely because of these sort of things. I have little in common with most people. C'est la vie.

It seems I've found somebody like me. I am loath to let other people to earn my money. I buy a lot of food when the supermarket is reducing their stuff 1 hour before closing. Needless to say, I don't go to bars, don't go to cinema, don't listen to music, and don't buy clothes unless to replace broken ones.... looks like another obstacle to meet any friend

The issue is that poor is a state of mind. I can honestly tell you that I have seen people who have 6-figure incomes and are poor because they spend everything they make and then some. Broke is a state of not having any money. Broke is temporary, poor can be permanent. There is a big difference.

What is happening is that our culture defines wealth by how much and what type of stuff you have. I know this because I fell into the very trap that your friends are trying to get you into and it resulted in disaster. In fact, I am still trying to clean up from the disaster which occurred 5 years ago (but am almost finished). It was then that I decided that I would not be normal with my money every again.

What they are telling you is that you have to have this stuff in order to be rich and happy. However, stuff does not make you happy and having material possessions (most of which go down in value) certainly does not make you rich. They are telling you to get a credit card. Well, what will happen to your budget when you have a payment that keeps rising faster than your income. You do not need those problems.

I now live without credit and purchase stuff when I only have the cash. I am paying off the last of my non-mortgage debt and then will save up for a vehicle (currently driving a $300 garage sale car). I own some of the stuff that is talked about by the OP but not everything. I have cable for internet (which my boss pays for) but not TV. I do not have a video game system (in fact, I do not even own a TV). I have an iPod that is a few generations old. I have a old computer that my boss bought. Other than that, I am content with what I have.

The trick is that I look poor but really have a positive net worth. That is because rather than purchasing material things, I am putting my money to work. Paying off student loans so that I do not have that payment should I suffer a reduction in income. Putting my money in savings for a rainy day, and putting my money in things that go up in value (eventually). That is the secret of many millionaires. In fact, you are more likely to find a millionaire living is a solid middle-class neighborhood than at the top of the hill.

So I would suggest you either ignore your friends, or tell them that your lifestyle may be different but is certainly acceptable in our society. If they continue, I may suggest finding a new group of friends. I also suggest reading "The Millionaire Next Door" by Thomas Stanley who talks about the phenomena of millionaires not looking the part we expect in our society today.

MissConstrue mentions a debit card rather than a credit card. There is a big difference between the two:

A debit card allows you to make personal transactions by card instead of cash and enables you to buy goods over the internet. The only credit you have is an arranged overdraft that you agree with your bank. A debit card gives you flexibility while ensuring you don't borrow more than you can afford to pay back; the moment you step over your overdraft, you get hit with a £28 charge and you start getting your finances back on track.

A credit card isn't directly linked to your bank account and has much higher rates of interest. There is no real restriction on the amount you can borrow until it's too late and they have you completely enslaved.

Yes, I do earn above the national minimum wage, but I live on my own and have a car to run because I need it to get to work, it's not on a bus route. So most of my money goes on rent, council tax, electric and gas, petrol for the car, food. Then there isn't much left for clothes and going out.

I buy most of my clothes 2nd hand. I have learned which shops make good quality clothes and I look for those clothes on ebay and in charity shops. I budget myself 1 trip to visit my parents or a friend per month or 1 night meal out.

It annoys me when my friends who are married moan that they have no money. They've got 2 incomes coming in! I really struggle. A lassie I know invited me to see a classic film I really wanted to see at the cinema and it was 2 days before I got paid and she had a two for one offer and I couldn't even afford that. I do feel like I miss out sometimes because I can't afford to go out to things.

Seems like as long as you can afford internet connection, you can do lots of stuff without additional costs.

I don't think its intentional, at least for most people. Its just that our society spends time doing many things that costs money. I don't get it either. Honestly, I find that most vacations are not worth the cost.

the thing i have noticed, here on WP as well as every place else, is that the successful folk who make and have lots of money and resources, are primarily defined by their reluctance to be associated with anything having to do with those who are unlike them, i.e., folks in a lower socioeconomic bracket- upper class eschewing middle class eschewing working class eschewing underclass. even on WP whose members might be expected to know better, there is voluntary class distinction going on. why is this? why can't we all just get along rather than spurning the upreached hand? why do the folks with the money and the luck and the looks and the connections and all the rest of the good things in life, tend to look down their noses at the less-fortunate folks who lack these things? why do so many of the higher-functioning cognitive elites snub the duller people? why does the adoration and warm fuzzies only go upwards to the top-dwellers, rather than back down to the commoners? why does nancy reagan call working class folk "riff-raff"? [upon her husband's election as POTUS, she infamously said "no more riffraff in the whitehouse!"] why, god, WHY?

I feel sort of similar. Ever since I got out of high school I've been working and all the money has always had to go to bills or gas for the car or food. Sometimes it feels like I never have any money to do anything fun. I don't have a credit card as I know that I have problems remembering to only spend as much as I have, so I like having just plain cash so I know when I run out.

I consider myself poor but my husband doesn't. He wants to get another phone but it's out of the question right now. I don't want anymore bills to pay. I want to cancel Comcast cabel if they keep raising the fricken price and just get Netflix where I can watch any movies for free only for $8.99 a month, including TV series, my brother in law gave us his login information so we can use it too. Now twice I am unable to pay 25 bucks to Children International to help that little girl. We need to save money for my husband's pills, my medical bill, and for other things. Luckily I am working again so we be able to save money again without losing any. I am even thinking to start taking the bus again to get to my doctor appointments and to places to save on gas since I have a bus pass. Good thing we got a honorary citizen one because we would have been way low in our account if we didn't sign for one. The adult bus passes here are $76 for two zone and $86 for all zone and the honorary citizen is only $25 a month and you can go in all zones. And the company is talking about raising the bus fare again and I am like forget it, we going getting those passes so we aren't blowing our budget. Thank goodness our landlord doesn't raise the rent. She said she can't due to the age of the building.

Plus we shop at Winco Foods that have inexpensive prices on food and we are able to eat healthy. We buy fresh fruit and vegetables and whole wheat bagels and grain pasta.

We get by without any section 8 nor food stamps and my husband has health insurance from work. We can't even afford to travel far and we never go out of town. We did go to Montana back in May to see my parents and my grandparents who came all the way from Wisconsin and it put us in a hole right now. I should have canceled the trip after seeing how low we got in our account already. Now we are finally using a balance statement book to keep track of how much we have in the bank. Before, we never had to keep track and now we do.

Does a $1000 per month salary is considered poor?

Oh well maybe...to your standards , I am very poor. Even a beggar in US would make more than me (I have masters degree).

To my country's standards, I am like the most (well...poor , lol) .

Last edited by The_Face_of_Boo on 05 Jul 2010, 2:06 pm, edited 2 times in total.

Most banks these days have an online banking service that you can use. Once you register, all you have to do is login and you can check your balance and recent statements.

Technically, yes, my income is far below the national poverty line. I applied for food stamps and have to go to the Welfare office and get it sorted so I can get them. Even if I got another job I would be poor. I am getting by though. It's tough, and this economy sucks. I'm not sure how long I can last like this. People do sometimes have a difficult time understanding the situation, especially because I used to make a lot more money and was much freer in how I spent it.

I know the OP mentioned debit card but that does not make sense based on what he was talking about because even with a debit card, you still do not have money unless you are willing to pay the $40 overdraft charges and even that is going away soon based on the new federal rules.