Anyone from the Barrie, Ontario area?

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I'm trying really hard to make some friends and so far it hasn't been working. I live in Barrie and I was wondering if there was anyone else nearby looking for a friend. I've been so lonely lately that I actually considered hiring an escort to be my friend for a couple of hours. I've tried to start a social group in Barrie for people that have a hard time making friends, but it's been a flop. I even replied to people looking for friends on kijiji, but that hasn't led to anything. I'm getting pretty desperate, but I'm going to keep at it!