Types of Humor
I find it interesting that depending on the person, many/most people have some sort of a sense of humor, or at the very least an appreciation for it. Something that I've observed over the past few years is how humor can either act as a "bonding agent" or a deterrent to hanging out with someone. It appears that humor can be of great help in bonding people together as either friends or even attracting a dating partner/spouse. Perhaps it is because a person who likes to laugh or help others laugh (and feel at ease) seems to be a fun person that does not always have to take life so seriously.
In actuality, humor is an art. My opinion is that is does not have to come natural to a person, but can be practiced and developed over the years. Let me give an example here. When I was young, people would get frustrated with me because if/when I was made fun of by friends in jest, I would take it seriously. My default way of reacting was to take them literal, rather that understanding/accepting that they really were using humor to "lighten things up" and bond with me. It took years for me to finally get and appreciate that this was what many NTs do.
Since my early 30s....have actually developed an ability to even laugh at myself in moderation...especially if I make a faux pas or a silly mistake here and there. It seems that people like this and look to me more as a personable human, rather than a complex alien...haha. At the same time, am still experimenting through some trial and error as to what work best vs. what may unwittingly offend another person.
Anyways...I still have a long way to go...perhaps some old beliefs/habits have resurfaced in my life. For instance, over the past few months....a man with autism that I know has called me "weird" and "evil." He admits to liking dark and quirky humor...yet not sure if this applies to his reaction to me. However, he seems to flirt with me...which makes my head spin and it can get very confusing. This guy will also ask for my help with things (yet does not ask others for favors) and then will immediately change his mind and/or walk right off after he asked me to explain something. My head is wondering whether he is teasing me in a jokingly way, or if he really dislikes me and intends to hurt my feelings? Maybe I am not as good at detecting humor as I hoped/thought I was???
I'm looking for feedback from you all in a couple of areas (or anything else you'd like to share with in regards to understanding the social skills/use of humor). Thanks in advance! Here are my main 2 questions:
1.) Do you ever innocently tease/joke with people that you like...only to later have found out than a NT has taken it in a negative way?
2.) What style of humor do you have and/or appreciate the most? (sarcasm, high brow/intelligent, jokes at others' expense, self-deprecating humor, dark humor, campy humor, ironic humor, etc.)
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Your Aspie score: 154 of 200
Your neurotypical (non-autistic) score: 56 of 200
You are very likely an Aspie
AQ Test Score: 37
