Is it a bad thing to be a 'load-off' for obsessive talkers?

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When with friends and family I talk just as much as I listen.

However there are some people I will listen to more than I talk to them.

I've noticed that, sometimes, I end up being a 'load-off' for obsessive talkers.

I think that aspies aren't the only one's who like to go on and on and on and on and on about something - there are certain NT's who enjoy talking about themselves and things about their own life and manage to go and on and on.

This is what i've ended up becoming. I let N.T friends 'load-off' on me. If they want someone to go on and on with about nothing and mindless meaningless stuff no one would care about, I will listen - or fake listen, or half listen. Whatever.

I'm actually fine with it.

Is it a good or bad thing?

With my internet running very slow and stuffing up, i seem to have accidentally double posted this thread.

Can a mod please delete the accidental copy so that there is only one? Thank you...

Depends if you mind it or not. I've avoided people who would monopolize my time, especially chronic complainers. Sometimes people like that can be entertaining and curious--like their mouth runs separately from their brain (good and bad). After a while of it either way, my ears need a breather.

Personally I find that quite stressful, to be on the receiving end, even though at other times I am guilty of being the repetitive talker. But if you don't mind it and it has no ill effects to listen to an extremely obsessive talker talking at you, then I don't see the harm.

It's only if it causes you stress and discomfort and negative consequences that you should avoid it. It causes those things for me so I have to avoid those people. I had a very strange woman talk my ear off twice in the same week and I actually became physically ill while she was doing it. I almost passed out physically, literally.

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Oh dear...That must be hard. I'm sorry this kind of things happen.

For me I do feel a bit drained/strained socially from it.

It doesn't make me guilty, but I only really listen half the time. Sometimes I don't care at all about what they say and only fake-listen.

Really, I just don't understand it myself. I seem so drawn to these kinds of people, and they seem so drawn to me at the same time.

N.T's who love to talk about their own interests or if we have similar interests try to find common ground by talking and talking about it.

I guess because of my issues with small-talk, and there issues with finding someone who will listen to them, bring us together...

I'd second the idea that it depends how you feel about it. People tend to do this with me quite a lot, and I don't mind, it's only when I'm overwhelmed already or they want advice that I can't give that it is pretty stressful. Otherwise I'm kinda pleased that they feel able to do that and maybe it's helping them in some way.

If you don't mind doing it, people really like a listener. There are far too few of them in this world.

Here's the catch: Only do it for people who will return the favor. Don't spend your time and energy on people who want you to listen, and listen, and listen, and then aren't there when you need a listening post.

Two reasons:

1) Life is short, time is limited, all that. Don't waste yourself on people who only want to take.

2) If you are able to work, or choose to marry and have kids, your time and ability to listen will become more limited. The good friends, the ones with whom it's give-and-take, will hang on even if their life track doesn't mirror yours. The ones who just hang around because you make them feel like the center of the solar system won't.