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KatieRose212
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Joined: 14 Apr 2008
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25 Apr 2008, 3:27 pm

Recently I had a meltdown.. but I was fine beforehand. I had my life sorted out.. what career I wanted, if I ever wanted to get married, have kids etc...

NOW I don't even know who I am, I feel like I'm in this deep pit and when I TRY to get out of it, I only dig deeper....

I am so worried about everything in my life right now, I wonder if that is what is causing my depression...

People tell me not to worry about my family and get on with my life, but how can I? My family mean the world to me I don't want anything to happen to them! Same goes for my friends too...

Here's a few of the things I'm worried about (I don't mind posting personal problems because I trust all of you guys here!) -

- My health.. as you know from this post it's really bad
- My parents, they are fighting more and I'm worried they are going to get divorced
- My brother, he's just gone to prison and was out for a month now he's back inside again
- College. I really hate it, it's not working out as planned and I want to leave but my parents won't let me :(
- My friends. I'm worried that I'm going to lose my friends 'coz I'm being really mean to them at the minute.... I don't mean to be, it's coz I'm upset...

My mind is blank, I can't sleep at night because I'm not thinking about things.. 99% of the time I find my eyes fixated on something, and I don't see or hear anything around me. At night my eyes are fixed on the ceiling, and I'm just staring at it for the whole night and I can't even sleep. I have sleeping tablets but they don't seem to be working...

During the day I often find myself staring at the wall, or at the hedge outside my house... and people think I'm being rude if I'm staring at them, but the truth is I'm not... I can't think of anything else to do... in fact, I can't think at all.

I'm not eating properly, not sleeping properly, crying myself to sleep most nights and I've also yelled at a few of my friends recently for no reason whatsoever. One of my friends said 'hi' to me whilst shopping in the street and I yelled at her to leave me f***ing alone.. in a public place... :cry:

She knows I'm not mad at her, and that I'm in the middle of what seems to be a serious mental breakdown, but she still got upset at what I said. I feel even worse now.

And also before you guys ask yes I have a counsellor and yes I have a psychologist who help me.. and I been to the doctor's too, and she put me on those sleeping tablets...

Help me before I seriously hurt someone I love...


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sartresue
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25 Apr 2008, 5:40 pm

How to help topic

Jeepers. I am trying to figure out what to say, what to do. Is there anyone living near you from WP? Maybe you need to get away from your house right now and go to a safe place. You read as if you are trapped. You are stuck in a situation you did not create.

I hope some of the young posters here have some ideas. Please.
This is terrible.


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Tequila
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25 Apr 2008, 5:41 pm

Hiya KatieRose212. I can't offer you any real advice other than to say 'hang in there'. I note that you aren't a great distance away from me in fact - I'm near Preston. I occasionally come up Cumbria way for trips.



KatieRose212
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Joined: 14 Apr 2008
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25 Apr 2008, 6:12 pm

Hey guys.
Thanks for replying.

I know it's bad, and that I don't know what to do...

And yeah a few people from WP live near me.. nearest is Preston and then someone from Newcastle and a couple of people from Manchester...

Only thing is it will be really hard to plan a meet-up because I am down in college in Bath most of the year (except I decided not to go back now :D )...

So that's one load off my mind.. for NOW. (God I sound like that advert don't I? The Fairy Liquitabs one! :lol: )...

Yeah and anyway thanks for replying in the first place because truthfully I wasn't expecting any replies at all. it was just something i needed to get off my chest...


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Life is full of weird people - I am not one of them!