Have I "Missed the Boat"?

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One thing that's been getting on me today...

Like many of you (probably), I've been told that I've got the emotional maturity of a teenager, despite being in my mid-late twenties. I know I've been told that I've "been behind" my age level in social aptitude for, oh, a good part of my life now.

Why do I mention this? Because, as I've said, I'm in my mid-to-late 20s - and I'm single (never even had a girlfriend), unemployed, and still living with my parents while my peers have jobs, live on their own, and sometimes even are married!

I know I shouldn't rush into things (like marriage) and that I should try to be more mature, but how? And how long will it take? I know things like looks shouldn't be all that important, but I'd like to marry while the (hypothetical) Mrs. and I are still relatively young and good looking. But to get married, I'd have to be independent of my parents and hold down a good job, as well as the emotional maturity stuff...

Point is, I'm worried how "far behind" I am on maturity/social awareness/etc., by the time I've managed to set straight my life, I won't have much of a life left. I dunno, though I think that if I could trade my intelligence w/Asperger's for a "normal" level of maturity w/just average intelligence, I'd do so in a heartbeat...

I don't know. What do you think?

Be true to yourself and how you feel inside. Being in a relationship definately will not make you more mature. If you want to feel like more your own person, you need to do it yourself rather than expect a partner to give it to you.
I would focus on your career and developing yourself as an individual. Achieve financial independence, look after yourself, and the feeling will come. I'm 27 myself and only recently beginning to feel like I'm maturing (although I think I'll always be young at heart, and there's nothing wrong with that.)

Depends on what is more important to you. If finding the hypothetical "Mrs" while you are still both young enough to be attractive to one another is the most important thing (and I am 34 and single and can definitely relate to that), then don't worry so much about "catching up" maturity-wise and get out there and try to meet women. Trust me, I've seen some pretty immature guys get great girls... maturity isn't that big of a deal.

By all means, don't rush into anything....there's more to life than marriage. Sometimes it helps to set a timetable for yourself,
not to put pressure on yourself but to reflect, "what do I expect to accomplish in three years, five years, in ten years, etc?

Before considering marriage, you need to feel comfortable with living independently, working in a job or find some other sufficient way to support yourself economically in these challenging economic times, finish college to better prepare yourself for life's harsh realities... and consider what will be involved in the support for a wife and possibly a child or children.

Many people who marry in their twenties often find themselves divorced by the time they are in their forties. So take your time before you take on the challenges of married life.

Might I add, that wanting to get married early (especially if you don't have a long-term partner) could be a red flag that you're just looking for someone to take care of you. Ie, now that you've moved away from mother, your gf can fill that role (or gender reversed). So it would probably make you less mature in the long run.

Well, I don't think my wanting to get married is really a need for a "replacement mom." (Ew!) I was allowed to "date" upon turning 16 and promptly plotted to woo my crushes - I even asked one girl (who was, at best, an acquaintance) if she would be my girlfriend!

Also, just to clear things up, my goals are, in order of priority:
1) Obtain gainful employment
2) Live on your own reasonably well
3) Date girls/find future bride.

So, job first, then own place, then get the girl.

Sounds like a good plan.

I feel like that. I have financial independance - though my parents still pay me some extra luxuries, but technically I could go on living like this forever with no extra help.
Other than that my life is having a hard time getting elsewhere; I can't get a job I like - I'm behind 5 years in that sense. I have little to no social life and a lot of people seem to hate me with insane intensity. A lot of "normal" girls would shun me if they knew about this - even if I managed to meet them through a renewed social life.