My novel

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I wrote this promo for my book "The Fate Horizon"

It's midnight in the Museum of Medicine more than 300 years into the future. The skies are covered in a green aurora, and a group of terminally ill kids have just woken up in an exhibit surrounded by dead bodies. They walk through the museaum and uncover the story of what happened. As they explore they force themselves upon a grim realization; there is no doctor, everyone is dead, and now they are in a race against time to rebuild the human race before they die of their diseases.

What if this were part of a series, like the Marlowe books by Chandler? I could see the titles: Eva's Big Hello, Eva and the Stork, Eva on Escargot, Exit from Eva...

Really winging it this time. Finished first chapter.

Hey, Giftorcurse. Just thought I'd give you some advice. If you really get stuck on a novel, trying writing another. I'm still stuck on my own little science fiction story, so I'm currently trying to figure out the kinks of a fantasy work, and it fulfills my need to be creative.

Is this a good storyline? Warning: Very vague.

Eva's bleak morning routine.

Trish (Asian cyborg working for Prometheus) gives her an origami figure instructing her to come to the principal's office.

Eva blackmailed by Krieger, the prinicipal, and her part-time boss into volunteering for a project.

Eva meets her Prometheus appointed psych, Holden.

Eva's job as a "runner".

Eva and Brian, ex-lovers, encounter each other.

Eva undergoes psychoanalysis.

Eva and Holden get drunk that same night and screw.

Eva is given an apple containing a DNA altering virus. She blacks out after eating it.

Eva is taken out of a womb-like construct by the docs. Holden cradles her naked, semi-conscious body.

Eva wakes up, gets disturbed, and a chase through the Prometheus Corporation HQ ensues. She discovers her new powers.

Further therapy strengthens her and her powers.

Eva is sent out into the world again.

Various students ask if she's feeling okay.

Other experimental subjects, roaming the school. New students.

Eva's first trial.

Eva meets Cameron, a nihilist. They screw a few hours after introducing each other.

Brian calls Eva. The latter tries to seduce him over the vidphone by caressing herself.

Cameron's philosophy is elaborated upon.

Eva's second trial.

Enter Natasha Grant, rich redesign.

Eva, Natasha and Cameron hang out at a spa.

Eva, Natasha, and Cameron do the Red Room, Natasha's privately owned nightclub. Brian is there. He and Eva dance, earning Cameron's ire.

Catharsis subjects confront Eva and Brian.

Trial three. More destructive, violent than the others.

Cameron edges closer to mental collapse.

Eva gets more paranoid. She's starting to freak out.

Eva asks Natasha for help.

Natasha is killed.

Eva finds Holden beaten, his house ransacked.

Cameron commits suicide.

Eva undergoes a mental breakdown.

Fourth trial: Kill Brian, because he's been investigating the Catharsis subjects. Trish has an eye gouged out, revealing she's a cyborg.

Eva and Brian fight.

Eva and Brian reconcile, and make love.

Eva travels to PCHQ to confront Krieger about the nature of the project. He reveals his master plan. Eva kills him in the subsequent fight. Eva tries to kill herself by blowing her brains out. She survives.

Eva and Brian are blackmailed into silence by Cope, Krieger's right-hand woman, and Corporation execs. Holden resigns, and Trish disappears, but not before giving Eva an origami figure of a butterfly, based on one of Eva's dreams.

Eva tells the traumatized Catharsis subjects to smell the roses.

Eva travels to a wasteland, laying on the ground. The wasteland morphs into a beautiful urban park. Eva closes her eyes.

Could work, possibly. How long are you aiming for the novel to be; are you planning on trying to get it published? I read somewhere that a lot of publishers these days are rather hesitant to accept anything under about eighty thousand words.

One suggestion I'd like to make though is about the sex. Always try to make it fit into the story logically, not just throwing sex in there for the sake of sex and 'edginess'.

While the novel I'm working on has several sex scenes in it, I'm fitting them into the story as part of the character development as a healthy part of the pre-existing long-term relationship between two of the main characters. I'm using it to bring to light some of their fears, traumas, morals, opinions, insecurities, and desires, and not just 'these characters have sex because the can and it makes the story seem more mature'.

That's not a stab at you though, I'm just stating my approach to it in my own work.

Don't worry, I find my reasons.

Did I mention Eva's eighteen and Holden's in his fifties?

Is Holden even a real name?

It's going to remind a lot of people of The Catcher in the Rye btw. You okay with that? (I don't mind it btw, just always thought it was a weird name).

A lot of this stuff seems way too advanced for 2016. Also, when I read stuff I like to think about how it would work in real life... a DNA-altering apple kind isn't something that I would believe unless it's explained really well. Just some considerations.

I really like the idea of 'changing' yourself in this way. The idea of people wanting to improve different aspects of themselves and doing crazy things in order to get it is interesting to me (I don't imagine DNA altering apples come cheap). If you ever get stuck on the main story you should consider doing some short stories from the perspectives of other characters. Gives you an opportunity to practice your writing and experiment with different ideas. Plus there's no pressure if it's just for fun/practice.