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PhosphorusDecree
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18 Sep 2025, 8:14 am

What it says on the tin. In theory, I'm "high functioning." I work nearly full-time; I live in a council flat by myself. I a have also not managed to fully clean the bathroom since before Christmas (it is now September), and that's just one of many, many ways I am a disasterous failure at day-to-day life. Anyone else out there in the same situation?


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BTDT
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18 Sep 2025, 8:46 am

I live in a three bedroom ranch all by myself. I'm learning routines to insure that everything gets done.



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18 Sep 2025, 9:42 am

It can still mean you're high-functioning. I work and live with my NT partner, but neither of us do much cleaning around the flat. I have executive functioning issues and my partner is just lazy. I'm a cleaner at work but when I'm at home I don't seem to notice mess or dirt really. I just walk by it every day, completely oblivious. But my partner does too. Obviously we do cleaning here and there to maintain general hygiene, but there's still a lot we don't do - until we're expecting company.


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firemonkey
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19 Sep 2025, 5:55 am

I don't see myself as 'high functioning' as although I live independently, I have quite a lot of support. The adaptive functioning < intelligence level gap is quite large. I've never been great re the practical use of intelligence.


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Tamaya
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19 Sep 2025, 6:33 am

firemonkey wrote:
I don't see myself as 'high functioning' as although I live independently, I have quite a lot of support. The adaptive functioning < intelligence level gap is quite large. I've never been great re the practical use of intelligence.


I think functioning is based on self-opinion really. So if you don't consider yourself high-functioning then that's okay. Only you know your own self better. :)

I have challenges but I still consider myself high-functioning, probably because of how good my social skills are for an ASDer and how much I don't seem autistic from the outside.

The only support I'll need is financial support if I ever had to support myself in the future, because the only thing I really find challenging is employment. I'm in employment but it's only part-time cleaning, as that seems to be all I can do. Having dyscalculia can affect what job you can do and also so can ADHD.


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PhosphorusDecree
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19 Sep 2025, 8:18 am

I guess "care needs" is closer to what I mean than "functioning." Like, I get assessed as having basically no domestic care needs, then I go home to watch my lazy spiders refusing to eat the latest generation of fruitflies hatching from the bin, and I settle down into the one usable chair in a hill of rubble. I think there's also an assumption that "autistic" = "unemployed," so how could I possibly not have the time and energy to deal with this stuff? Which is frustrating. They should try working 30 hours a week with my brain, see how much they can cope with then. Yet I have to admit, when I'm off work, I'm actually WORSE. That's when I turn into a shivering wreck and start forgetting to eat.


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Tamaya
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19 Sep 2025, 2:20 pm

I find routine draining, so that is why part-time work only is more needed for me, rather than full-time. I mean it might depend on what sort of job I'm in as well. But sometimes I can literally have a day where I literally "can't be bothered", though not in a lazy slob way, just executive functioning issues and maybe a bout of anxiety or depression, triggered by something else that is currently stressing me. RSD can be disabling too. If I'm being bullied or actively disliked or picked upon in the workplace, it can stress me out severely, as I don't really have the emotional regulation skills to ignore or deal with it. Also I think I'm stupid, because I do stupid impulsive mistakes and then can't deal with the consequences and just spend days beating myself up about it until it has blown over.
I've had a few meltdowns at work because of feeling picked upon by snitches and supervisors.

Snitches are the worst. Most of the time they are only out to stir up trouble, enjoying seeing you in trouble if they don't like you. Some snitches do it to suck up to the management but are usually huge hypocrites. For example they can be seen on their phones a lot during work time or not doing their jobs properly, yet if they see you on your phone or that you haven't done your job properly then they are straight down the office reporting it to the management. Then they rub their hands together when their victim is getting into trouble. That is workplace bullying, in my opinion. They're not doing it to be a 'good Samaritan' passionate about following rules. They are doing it because they want to intimidate and see you in trouble. I mean, they wouldn't do it to their friends. But if they don't like you then they'll do it to you, if they're unpleasant people to begin with.


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firemonkey
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19 Sep 2025, 5:58 pm

My organising and planning ability is far from good.I struggle to prioritise well when it comes to multi step tasks. The only practical skill I'm reasonably good at is money management. My social skills leave a lot to be desired. I have official dxes plus probable/possible dxes,plus several physical health conditions. ASD(official),schizophrenia(official), social anxiety(official), ADHD inattentive(possible),dyspraxia(probable) dysgraphia(probable) + total aphantasia . Physical health = reduced mobility,Barrett's oesophagus,lymphoedema,premature osteoporosis,atrial fibrillation, and rheumatoid arthritis.


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22 Sep 2025, 9:17 pm

PhosphorusDecree wrote:
What it says on the tin. In theory, I'm "high functioning." I work nearly full-time; I live in a council flat by myself. I a have also not managed to fully clean the bathroom since before Christmas (it is now September), and that's just one of many, many ways I am a disasterous failure at day-to-day life. Anyone else out there in the same situation?

When I worked 4 days a week and rented a basement suite I didn't have the energy to clean as much as a normal person would. Try not to beat yourself up about it you are obviously doing your best. My support worker says that working one job as an Autistic person is equivalent to an average person working 2-3 jobs all at once, as far as difficulty and energy consumption is concerned.



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12 Oct 2025, 8:14 am

If you're not getting sick from living in a dirty place, then you don't have a problem. None of my family members like cleaning so we rarely do them. :D We do keep up with dishes, laundry, basic bathroom cleaning. Anyone who want to visit need to give at least a three day notice, and we always did cleaning as a family activity. We each have our own tasks and areas. I simply can not imagine cleaning by myself. 8O


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