Hi howdy

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Hi, Im Emilia. I had an account on this forum ages ago but cant remember the username or email or password. Oh well, whatever. Im a 21 year old sperg. Often times I seriously don't think anyone else has anything close to the inner world i experience, it's more helpful to be on a forum like this where i can see there is at least people who think like me.

I am apparently extremely accustomed to masking. This is of my own volition because I desire to be liked and not have people think I'm weird (bad weird, good weird is ok) so it's just a necessity. That being said, what do you do when you've spent so much time LARPing you don't really know what's going on under there? Lol

I like messageboards, I can really post my stream of consciousness without pretense... its fun. I can talk directly. I dont have to deal with people just not f*****g understanding what im talking about because they have to be told things in a certain performative social manner or theyre clueless.

I'm a lame girl in the body of an attractive guy. I guess it's whatever, but I haven't really been able to feel attractive because I'm not good at being a guy at all. Technically, I'm really not very great at being a girl either, this is just how autism is of course. Maybe I'm agender, but being seen as a man is literally unbearable and i also would love to be a beautiful girl. So i guess thats what i want. I've never experienced genuine suicidal thoughts, but i listen to violent music and express performative suicidal ideation to just make people worry about me. But nobody ever does anyway. Sigh. And even when they do I guess I just say "It's fine."


I like to talk a lot. And just keep talking. And I wish people would just let me talk their ear off. But sometimes it feels awkward, nobody wants to get caught up in talking anymore... Everyone is so much less social these days. Myself included, but it's only cause Im scared of people. Lets all be less ashamed to talk to people in real life.

I dont know how long ill be here before i get distracted and check out just like everything else in my life, but it will be nice to be around people who experience the same thing as me. The realization that other people just aren't like us.

Welcome back!

I hope you find WP to be a pleasant and helpful place to frequent.

Thanks friends

Welcome back to Wrong Planet!

Hi Emilia and WB to the planet.

I'll no doubt be calling you Akemi in future,... I don't think I'll be able to link those names in my head

Ahoy-hoy.