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Is it easy to control than out of your control with dating?

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Carbonhalo
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Yesterday, 5:39 pm

Mona Pereth wrote:
Sounds like an unusual set of circumstances, not a typical way of meeting someone at a bar. What impelled the two of you to crawl under a pool table together?


She'd come with someone else and was sneaking out of the bar with a few friends.
(I was actually aiming at the blonde in front but the crowd was like treacle to move through)
She didn't want the guy she came with seeing her.
(It's just as well I didn't get to the blonde... A few weeks later she split my head open with a tossed beer can (full))
Turns out she's nasty with a skinful, as I saw with how she treated a few of her subsequent boyfriends)
On the other hand... She's still sexually active whereas my partner turned ace decades ago.



Mona Pereth
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Yesterday, 6:24 pm

Tamaya wrote:
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Lemme guess: You're physically very attractive


Thank you, but no I'm not that physically attractive. I don't really wear makeup or dye/style my hair (which is unusual for a woman), and I never wore short skirts. In fact I didn't wear skirts or dresses at all (still don't now). I dress in a sort of chav style (hoodies and trainers), though in summer I wear short shorts.

I don't think I'm very attractive. My eyes are close together and I look too much like my dad. He is attractive for a man, but for someone to look identical in facial features looks a bit out of place on a girl.

Being attractive is not necessarily the same thing as conforming to fashionable beauty standards.

If you've attracted lots of attention from men who find you attractive, then you are attractive, even if women who look like you don't get featured in fashion magazines, or in the mass media more generally.


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Mona Pereth
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Yesterday, 6:28 pm

Carbonhalo wrote:
She'd come with someone else and was sneaking out of the bar with a few friends.
(I was actually aiming at the blonde in front but the crowd was like treacle to move through)
She didn't want the guy she came with seeing her.
(It's just as well I didn't get to the blonde... A few weeks later she split my head open with a tossed beer can (full))
Turns out she's nasty with a skinful, as I saw with how she treated a few of her subsequent boyfriends)

Ugh. Sounds like you would have been better off never having met either of these women.

One more reason NOT to regard bars as a good place to meet people.


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Carbonhalo
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Yesterday, 7:37 pm

Mona Pereth wrote:
Ugh. Sounds like you would have been better off never having met either of these women.

One more reason NOT to regard bars as a good place to meet people.


I beg to differ... For the most part.
We were happy together for 25 years and she guided me to build my (our) dream.
I love the both of them but apparently they're both impossible to live with.
Now that we have drifted apart considerably in our aims and dreams I might consider it questionable as to if it would have been better for us not to have paired off.
(I'm still attracted to the blonde but even in my desperation would be careful about the transient nature of any further entanglement)
How would my dreams have differed with someone else's input?

I have to ask the OP... Can you please rephrase the original question?
It's grammar ties my head in knots..
I don't mean alter the title, but tell me again what you were asking in other words.



Tamaya
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Yesterday, 8:17 pm

Mona Pereth wrote:
Tamaya wrote:
Quote:
Lemme guess: You're physically very attractive


Thank you, but no I'm not that physically attractive. I don't really wear makeup or dye/style my hair (which is unusual for a woman), and I never wore short skirts. In fact I didn't wear skirts or dresses at all (still don't now). I dress in a sort of chav style (hoodies and trainers), though in summer I wear short shorts.

I don't think I'm very attractive. My eyes are close together and I look too much like my dad. He is attractive for a man, but for someone to look identical in facial features looks a bit out of place on a girl.

Being attractive is not necessarily the same thing as conforming to fashionable beauty standards.

If you've attracted lots of attention from men who find you attractive, then you are attractive, even if women who look like you don't get featured in fashion magazines, or in the mass media more generally.


Nah, I'm not as attractive as my sister and cousins. I'm not Miss World, far from it.


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