I have always wanted and needed friends, I don't like being alone for too long for it makes me feel all sad and restless. I accidentally isolate myself sometimes by forgetting to see people so have to get back on track. Needing to actively reinforce bonds on a regular basis makes me understand where OP is coming from with the "unpaid job" analogy. It is a lot of work, I think it's worth it in the long run. But it is work!
I also relate to what you/OP said about friends not wanting to do the same things as you. There are many activities that I prefer to do alone because I don't have to compromise on how time is spent and the order things are done in. I want to do it my way and not be stuck in one place for too long. It drives me round the twist if I'm with people and we're hovering aimlessly trying to decide on the next spontaneous action. On my own I can actually plan stuff! So when I go to long social events I pre-plan a lone buffer activity to do on the way home.
I have an inner conflict where I need company and to connect with my friends and feel the love but I also want to f**k off and do my own thing and not share. I tend to find it far far easier to make friends via shared interests too, just being in the same place at the same time is never enough. So as a result I almost exclusively befriend furries, I'm used to doing it, I know what to say to them and what their personalities tend to be. They're familiar.
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MONKEY 2, 30s boogaloo
06 Aug 2026, 4:46 pm
