Should I tell my 10 y/o daughter

Post Reply New Topic

I would tell her. Sometimes it helps to put a name on something, to keep it from being a "monster-under-the-bed". Anyway, if she has internet access she may find out herself. At age 11 I Googled my "symptoms" to see if my difference was more than just oddness. I was formally diagnosed a year ago. Kids want to know, in most cases, and will try to find out, in some. Would you tell her as a teenager? It's only three years away.

I found out when I was about 8 and really didn't care until about 15 so I think it depends on the person. If your daughter has an accepting and calm personality then there would be no problem in telling her.

I would tell her. Then whenever, if ever, a friend comes out to her, she can make a connection with her friend and only make the friendship deeper. I found out at 13. I think it was a good age, but I really didn't care until I was 14. Now I'm proud and even though I don't spout it out to random people on the street, I'm not ashamed of it at all and I feel comfortable with the labels of autistic and asperger's syndrome. It's just a part of me and I don't make it the only part of me, but I don't try and ignore the diagnosis.

Tell her. She's gonna find out anyways, and if she does find out on her own, she's gonna hate you for keeping it a secret. Knowing yourself is the first step in changing yourself.

At this point i would've liked to say "Know thyself" in Latin to emphasize my point, but I don't know the phrase in Latin. Damn it. Need to go watch The Matrix again...

10? I hate the way my parents always thought I was too immature to understand anything. Just tell her straight, what she has, what it means, her limitations, and how it's not the end of the world. In that order, I would think.

You'd be surprised at what kids understand these days, depending how you tell them. Get some reference material and some visual aids to help. Using bad examples always threw me off.

A bad example would be "look before you leap" as it could be taken literally, instead go for something that really applies, and include real examples

My 10 year old son just said tell her. Unless your embarrassed by her, and if you are thats your problem not hers. He said it helped him to understand who he was.

I am a parent, not a child, but it never once occurred to me to Not tell my son he has Asperger's. I think they have a right to know and understand that they are wired differently and sometimes having a name for it is comforting.

My autistic brother is 10. He doesn't know yet but my parents know they have to tell him soon, before he goes into the autism base at secondary school next year. He knows he's different but it doesn't seem to bother him that much. He doesn't seem to care why he's different. He just accepts it. But we will tell him soon I'm sure.

I think you should if not already.

It really does depend, if you tell her ask her if she wants you to tell her friends, etc. Some kids like to talk about having Aspergers and some don't, you can wait longer, maybe a year or so, but if she asks, probably you should tell her

Tell her she is lucky to be wired differently to appreciate the true beauty of the world and she gets to experience the wonderful magic of imagination and creativity and being her own special person and not just a boring one of the crowd.

I am 10 and I have known since I was 6 though I didn't entirely understand it then, I have learned a lot lot more since and I like being different and it was nice to know what was 'wrong' with me.

Lou

My daughter is 8 and she knows. She's not accepted it yet really and gets upset that she's different. She cries that she wants things to be easy. Sometimes she cries that things are so much harder for her than others but I point out the positives too. It's a process. I have shown her this board and she really gets happy when she sees posts by other kids like her...but she is not ready to post here yet. One especially good moment for her was reading the thread on what makes you mad...she laughed so much and said "they are all just like me,". So in that regard, knowing that the difference has a name and that there are other kids out there like her has helped.