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My therapist told me...

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Fnord
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12 May 2022, 1:44 pm

My therapist told me...

...that my crayon drawing was funny.

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I laughed at his chalk outline.



Fnord
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12 May 2022, 1:46 pm

...a few jokes about an unemployed people to cheer me up.

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Sadly, none of them worked.



Fnord
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12 May 2022, 1:48 pm

...that I am not completely useless.

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Because I could always be used as a bad example.



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12 May 2022, 1:49 pm

...that she sponsors a website for orphans.

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It doesn’t have a home page.



Polynechramorph
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12 May 2022, 2:03 pm

.. that I had a media addiction.
Posted...


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Convention is the last refuge for the unimaginative! Oscar Wilde(ish)


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12 May 2022, 2:23 pm

... that lopping off the upper portions of an entire family of plants, right in the middle of their mating season and presenting their mutilated corpses as an offering for a willing female to witness their slow and torturous demise displayed in a decorative ritualistic fashion, was an acceptable romantic gesture.

But I'm the one with social problems? Really?


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I could try to be more "normal" but I hold myself to a higher standard!
Convention is the last refuge for the unimaginative! Oscar Wilde(ish)


Last edited by Polynechramorph on 12 May 2022, 2:29 pm, edited 1 time in total.

Fnord
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12 May 2022, 2:28 pm

...I reminded her of her favorite '80s band.

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It was "Simple Minds".



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12 May 2022, 2:31 pm

...he was a Freudian psychotherapist.

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Then he asked for my id.



lostonearth35
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12 May 2022, 2:32 pm

That I was too apathetic.

But...*sigh*... what're ya gonna do?



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12 May 2022, 2:34 pm

...that I had a condition called the "Domino Effect".

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After I told her I was addicted to pizza.



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12 May 2022, 2:38 pm

That I should avoid using negative words such as "can't" and "not". Then she asked me if I was willing to do that.

Well, I can't see why not.



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12 May 2022, 2:39 pm

..."The trouble with Freudian psychotherapy is that if it's not one thing, it's your mother."



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12 May 2022, 2:48 pm

...that I needed to deal with my constant need to please others.

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I said, "Sure, if it will make you happy!"



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12 May 2022, 2:55 pm

...that denial is the first stage of grief.

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I said, "It is not!"



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12 May 2022, 3:05 pm

...that I was a psychopath.

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I do not know how I feel about that.



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12 May 2022, 3:09 pm

...the difference between a neurotic, a schizophrenic, and a psychiatrist.

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The neurotic builds Castles in the sky, the schizophrenic moves in, and the psychologist collects the rent.