bullied by neighbours at 5:30am

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Claradoon
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03 Aug 2009, 5:02 am

i can't stand this any more. when i walk Dawg we get accosted by various & sundry forms of humanity - i live in an area of high-rises, not to mention a high-rise old-age home and a shopping mall. in an effort to get away from all these people, i walk Dawg at 5:30am. and this morning along comes a woman with 2 small white dogs (same as mine) so i duck up onto a lawn to get away from them (avoiding huge barking session at dawn) - and - are you reading for this? -

***she followed us*** (did i mention this was at 5:30am?)

so it got into a madness of me trying to get away and her following and the dogs pulling every which way and finally i said to her "will you go away!" and she mimicked me, whining "myoom myoom myoom myoo myoom" with the same inflection as what I said.

and she moved along doing the whiny-mimic thing at me, while me and my Dawg stomped back home. we had only got as far as the corner of my building.

i can't live with this kind of harassment any more. it happens (with different people) every time i go out. the only reason I don't kill myself is my Dawg.



Bullwinkle
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03 Aug 2009, 5:06 am

The vampires feed off your fear, do not allow them their meal. Only then will they lose interest. Worse yet, the dogs understand this far better than we; they attack any weaknesses. They can smell it, and they egg on their 'masters'.



Bullwinkle
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03 Aug 2009, 5:15 am

We've got nothing to fear...but fear itself?
Not pain, not failure, not fatal tragedy?
Not the faulty units in this mad machinery?
Not the broken contacts in emotional chemistry?

With an iron fist in a velvet glove
We are sheltered under the gun
In the glory game on the power train
Thy kingdom's will be done

And the things that we fear are a weapon to be held against us...

He's not afraid of your judgment
He knows of horrors worse than your Hell
He's a little bit afraid of dying
But he's a lot more afraid of your lying

And the things that he fears are a weapon to be held against him...

Can any part of life be larger than life?
Even love must be limited by time
And those who push us down that they might climb
Is any killer worth more than his crime?

Like a steely blade in a silken sheath
We don't see what they're made of
They shout about love, but when push comes to shove
They live for the things they're afraid of

And the knowledge that they fear is a weapon to be used against them...

--Neal Peart "The Weapon"



Tory_canuck
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03 Aug 2009, 5:21 am

File a restraining order, and if she continues, call the cops.


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Bullwinkle
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03 Aug 2009, 5:25 am

Frankly, a restraining order against what? Going "Myoom, myoom, myoom?" A judge would laugh this out of court, and probably join in with the mocker in condemning the poor victim. The only way to stop a bully is to stand up to them. Dogs respect only power. And sadly, many people are little better than dogs...



Claradoon
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03 Aug 2009, 5:58 am

I am amazed and heartened that you would reply at all, and that you don't think I'm all wrong. I'm so alone in the world with this. I can't set foot out the door. My neighbour down the hall has a dog and she's been badgering me for two years. She follows me around with her dog too. Not all the time, just enough to drive me nuts. She can hear me leave and she can see me come back because the lobby shows on the TV.

How do I stand up to them? What do I do? It's *so* hard because this puts me in a really bad place re the human race, don't care for any of them, buncha aliens.

It occurred to me - this morning - was that the SPCA? Did somebody file a complaint? Because when they corner me I get mad and stomp away hauling on Dawg's leash - are they trying to take my dog away from me?



Bullwinkle
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03 Aug 2009, 6:17 am

You aren't wrong love, you are just being bullied by people who don't care about you. Its hard for me to say, but I think part of the problem is you thinking everyone else are aliens. In a strange sense, the world becomes what you see it to be. Even if everyone seems against you, you need to find someone other than a dog to bond with in your neighborhood. It can start small: a smile, a wave, an offer to help with spilled groceries...but as long as fear and isolation dominate your thoughts, so too will they dominate your existance.



Bullwinkle
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03 Aug 2009, 6:21 am

As for standing up to them, it doesn't have to be a fight. The sidewalk is just as much yours as theirs. DONT run off into the grass, just walk down the center of the sidewalk. If the mean lady wants to, let her ask for the right to pass. Its only fair. Yes it may mean a scuffle with her dogs but you owe it not just to yourself but to your dog to show that you are just as good as anyone. If you show fear, your dog will sense it and also feel afraid and then the other dogs just attack...



Apple_in_my_Eye
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03 Aug 2009, 6:21 am

Sounds like a job for Mr. Pepper Spray.
Or Mr. Video Cell Phone, maybe.

Sounds like she got her little feelings hurt from not being acknowledged as she pleased as you passed. Jeeze if people had a clue how much crap ASD people just take for granted they'd never complain. I don't have it that bad where I live now, but I do only venture out of my house during certain hours to avoid meeting anybody. I think some of my neighbors are similarly 'hurt' because in the past I rode by on my bike and didn't recognize them or just froze up and didn't say anything as I went by. Ugh, being neutral and minding one's own business just isn't enough is it?

Anyway, hope it seems less overwhelming tomorrow.

And I hope that lady's dogs chew her feet off in the night or something so she can't bother you for a while.



Bullwinkle
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03 Aug 2009, 6:34 am

If you only build walls to protect yourself, sooner or later they become the cage that binds your heart into a small place that no light can find. Yes its true that there are many 'bad' people out there but many are just confused and lonely just like you and just don't know how to live in peace. We all have to help each other learn to live together in our own humble ways. You don't have to be friends, but respect can only be mutual.



Claradoon
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03 Aug 2009, 6:36 am

you are such good people, all of you, thank you! i just back - again - after i read what you said i went back out with Dawg (real name Buddy) at 7am and everything went fine, sorta. Better than usual, anyway.

When Dawg was sniffing the mailbox, a man got out of a car that he had parked across from the mailbox, next to the median on a 4-lane boulevard. Not exactly casual, was it? He had some small square brown papers that he kept shuffling while he looked at us. i thought, is he going to give me an anti-poop notice? But dawg didn't poop and the guy kept going, crossed over to a high-rise and disappeared through its shrubbery.

There were 2 runners, in front of us and behind us, simultaneously, and i just stuck to the middle of the sidewalk and the runners moved into the street.

and dawg enjoyed the walk and i don't feel guilty. thankyou.



Bullwinkle
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03 Aug 2009, 6:45 am

Wonderful! I would try looking into this man's site/TV shows

http://www.cesarmillaninc.com/dogwhisperer/

He might help you understand your dog better, and in the process help you with people. I'm guessing your dog felt proud to have the sidewalk to its own, and proud of you too.



Claradoon
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03 Aug 2009, 7:02 am

I love Dog Whisperer, one of my favourite shows. But I understand my dog fine, it's people I don't get.

You mentioned I might be creating my own reality - true, I know. Years ago, I was doing mindfulness meditation and made tremendous strides with getting along in the world. But these days, I can't wish anybody well. I've tried -

I wish my dog well, okay.
Then I wish myself well - that feels a little like tempting fate: wish myself well, get hit by lightning.
Then I try to think of a neutral person so I can wish them well, and I can't think of any.
Then I'm supposed to think of a difficult person and wish them well, which I can't do, although I certainly could wish her dogs would chew off her toes.



ZEGH8578
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03 Aug 2009, 7:55 am

holy s**t, that woman should try that here.

i would probably get so mean in return, cops would fine ME. my brother... would probably get her hospitalized, and himself imprisoned

how dares she? :S litteralle, how does she have the bravery to go outside, and mess w neighbours that way? :S:S:S


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Claradoon
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03 Aug 2009, 5:59 pm

could you tell me exactly what would you do? i need to learn a little mean to be going on with.



0_equals_true
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03 Aug 2009, 7:11 pm

you changed your avatar :D

people don't like to be told to go away. best not to say anything.