Women--getting hit on

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I have read conflicting reports on here. Some women, like they typically do, express frustration at guys hitting on them, asking for sex or dates, etc. On the other hand, I've probably heard the most comments on here of anywhere from women who say that guys don't notice them at all, or not nearly enough as they would hope, and it makes them feel ignored by the male population. So I'm making this poll.

In my experience I do not get hit on by people who I find attractive (and those Ive made moves on tend to refuse me) but only get hit on by creepy/yucky people or married guys or psychos.

I do not mind men chatting to me or being flirty, I often chat to men in shops, on trains etc.

But I do object to 'vomit inducing' comments, the worst are sent by email. I find it very irratating when someone thinks I will sleep with them just because they have flatered me, it makes me cross.

When i was younger I experienced being groped in nightclubs which I hated and a few times guys followed me home from shopping which I really hated.

I think flirting first is proably preferable as then both parties can measure the interest. There is no problem with hitting on people in itself the problem comes from people not accepting 'no' gracefully but becoming pushy and aggressive.

i would take it that aspie women arent hit on unless they are extremely good looking or the man is convinced that getting sex from her would be easy. thats my thoughts on it at least.

I agree I think I come across to people as easy, Im not good at displaying snitty/unfriendly body language. I expect a lot of aspie women look vulnerable and niave and guys will think they would be easy to seduce.

I don't get hit on all that much at all (or at least I don't think so) and I'm actually ok with it. I think this is because I am naturally weary and find it difficult to make a connection with someone. I think that if someone did have the intention to hit on me, after speaking to me, they wouldn't as they would quickly come to realise they wouldn't get anywhere. However, I do have a very dirty sense of humour and I think that's given people the wrong idea in the past . I am a bit more mindful of who I am dirty humourous with now.

No' I'm too ugly

I am male, but I thought that I would add my experience here, as well. I have found that I often draw a fair ammount of unwanted and obtrusive attention (and not just from the opposite sex). I am really not sure why this is. I did not vote in the poll, but I think that I draw more attention than I would like.

I get hit on occationally. But Id say 3/4 of the time I get hit on, its more in a joking way. The guy isnt seriously into me. I dont know why guys do that. I dont really take it seriously the majority of the time I get hit on. Id say I would like it if I got hit on more in a serious way and not in a joking way.

Agreed.

Possibly... I picked: "I get hit on a lot and it bothers me". Not sure how they could possibly think that getting sex from me would be easy. I'm not extremely good looking either; I can be pretty at times, but not super attractive in the mainstream way that most guys go for.

Although maybe my definition of "a lot" is the equivalent of an NT's definition of "not enough".

I would have guessed it was some sort of naivety issue.

Hmmm yes, that could be it. Although I'm not sure how somebody I just met in the street could somehow instantly tell I was naive??

I picked "I get hit on a lot and it bothers me". Goodness, that makes me sound like a conceited balloon head.

But I would have chosen "I don't get hit on and it makes me feel unattractive" a year ago. But now I see that making me feel slightly more attractive is the only positive thing about my current situation. ):

Now I realize that before, I didn't usually find myself in a position that let guys to hit on me too often (hanging out with family and large groups of friends when in public).

Now I go to the store, class, and everywhere else alone or with one or two friends. And I guess that leaves me open for attack.
I laugh, but it is a problem. Recently, I actually had to leave a bookstore where I was planning to meet a friend because this guy wouldn't quit hitting on me. Something similar happened at the art museum a week or so earlier.
The reason why I'd say it happens "more often than I would like" is because it occasionally prevents me from doing things that I enjoy. For example, reading by myself at Barnes and Noble without having to pay 25 bucks for a hard cover novel.

Also, I feel like my personal space is invaded when people that I don't know come up to me and use a pick-up line - either commenting on what I'm doing, or asking me about myself. Like my privacy is invaded since they don't know me and are watching me.

Do those sound like Aspie concerns, more personal, unique concerns, or like complaints that anyone might have about people "hitting on her"? Just curious.

I know it sounds like I'm complaining about a good thing and/or being vain, but I just don't know what to do. I actually sometimes deliberately dress down now when I go on walks/ to the store because I always just feel so awkward and almost vulnerble when men approach me.
I mean, just the concept of a stranger expressing sexual interest in me frightens me. And I'm not sure if that is a normal way to feel about how men (that I don't know) evidently regard me or if my discomfort is unusual to have. ):

Someone said earlier that an Aspie girl's definition of "a lot" might be quite different from most people's definition of "a lot". I think this is probably true.
So if you want a more quantitative description of my situation than "I get hit on too much", I'd say that a stranger approaches me with an initial attention grabbing statement (pick up line), followed by friendly questions and maybe complements about once or twice a week. And I go out maybe twice a day. And around 25% of the time I'm out alone. So I think that's about... conservatively 30% of the time when I'm out alone I get hit on.
Is that "a lot" by normal people standards?

It really depends on who is doing the flirting, although I usually have a bit of an aversion to it. Something in the back of my head associates compliments and flattery with ulterior motives.

I prefer to make the first move most of the time. Surprisingly, some guys prefer that. Funny how that works.

There is a girl at my school who is a grade below me so she is a junior so shes going on 17 soon i assume. She is extremely good looking and guys hit on her all the time. A couple guys at school have raped her and she is easy and appears very naive. Ive talked to her before and i know that at heart she is very smart, i think she is an aspie. She seems afraid to say no to the guys who walk up to her and fondle her and stuff all day long.