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LankyBrit
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11 Apr 2011, 9:02 pm

I moved to the US from England eleven years ago. In all that time I managed to make one friend. You know, the friend that you feel truly comfortable with, that for some unfathomable reason you don't feel the social paralysis with, that one friend that doesn't mind the silences in the conversation, and who doesn't make you feel awkward when they happen?

I found out today that he's moving 1,800 miles away in August.

I have three friends in the whole damned world. Two of them live in England and one is going to be a couple of thousand miles away. Can't I catch a break here? Can't I be allowed just one stupid bloody social relationship that doesn't make me feel either like a freak or like a deer caught in headlamps?

I'm sorry. I just needed to rant.


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auntblabby
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11 Apr 2011, 10:22 pm

sorry man, that is tough. all my friends are beyond driving distance also. but at least you have [virtual] friends here on WP.



DanielF
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11 Apr 2011, 11:30 pm

I've found that one easy way to make friends is to participate in a social group like your local church choir, or by reaching out to people around you like the folks in your neighborhood/community or at work!


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LankyBrit
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11 Apr 2011, 11:55 pm

DanielF wrote:
I've found that one easy way to make friends is to participate in a social group like your local church choir, or by reaching out to people around you like the folks in your neighborhood/community or at work!


I've had the church suggested to me by SO many people. The one problem with that is that I'm an atheist! I live in one of the suburbs of Chicago about 45 miles west of the city, so I leave for work early in the morning and arrive home again late at night, so social interaction within the neighbourhood is pretty minimal all round (not to mention the fact that I'm not exactly a social butterfly :) ) Work suffers from a similar problem as the suburbs - everyone lives in a different suburb miles away from each other, so at the end of the day we all disappear in different directions.

I also have this weird categorization thing that goes on in my head. There's a very clear wall drawn between "work colleague" and "friend", and I haven't worked out how to get past that yet. I'm working on it with my therapist though, so hopefully I'll be able to make some progress there.


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nunctecognovi
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12 Apr 2011, 2:37 am

My friends too live very far from where I live. At the moment my boyfriend is my best friend.



LankyBrit
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12 Apr 2011, 5:07 pm

nunctecognovi wrote:
My friends too live very far from where I live. At the moment my boyfriend is my best friend.


Same here. Well, not exactly as I don't even know your boyfriend. However my wife IS my best friend :) She always has been right from the first time I met her, so much so that I don't even include her in my 'friends' list; she's so much more than that. I honestly owe so much to her. I've become more than I ever though possible since I met her.

I was just feeling sorry for myself because I watch her go out on Friday evenings with her friends, I wish I could do the same, but I have no idea how to go about doing so and the one person over here I'd actually call a friend is moving away :) Sometimes I just have to vent, you know?


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DanielF
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13 Apr 2011, 9:39 pm

Well L.B. your welcome to vent with any of us when ya feel like doing so! :)


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