When I was a kid, I made fun of another kid. My mother shamed me, and asked me to imagine what it would be like if I were the one being made fun of. This changed my life. I often imagine what it would be like if I were from a different country, SES, race, background, etc. I have a hard time being mean or responding mean to rude people because I always wonder what they went through that day, and it might just be that their dog ran away, and nothing I did. I also tend to defend people who abuse and manipulate people, even when I know they're doing it. I recognize some people's upbringing, how they came to think such behaviors are acceptable, and really just pity them. I think I am a very merciful person (most of the time) and therefore don't feel the need to always defend myself or pursue 'justice' (or the illusion of it) and just let things go. I already care very little of what people think of me, and think people who view me as a coward or less of a man for letting something go are people I wouldn't want to think highly of me in the first place.
Last week I was selling a textbook back to my university, for one of the managers to tell me I didn't buy it there, he never would have let it go on the shelves, as it was an 'international edition' or whatever. I did buy it there. He then 'implied without saying' that I got it off Amazon or something, and was trying to cheat them and rip them off, and he wasn't going to allow it. He asked for the receipt, which I didn't have because I didn't think there would be a problem, in five years there hadn't been one before. He snickered 'of course you don't' and ended up saying if I brought in a bank statement he'd consider buying it back. I did, with the prices of the books I bought equaling the statement amount, and he paid me back. Some people said I should get his name, write a report, etc. I just kept wondering how often the poor guy had to deal with obnoxious students who would try that, how tough his job must be, and then after I showed him the statement, I felt sorry for how embarrassed he must be.
Can anybody relate to this?
_________________
When you know you don't have all the answers, you begin to ask the right questions.
-Dr. Erik Selvig, Thor
http://aspiespy.blogspot.com/