Passing Concern (from Transman)

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Do people call young men or teenagers "honey"? I am called "honey" by almost every female cashier I come across.

As I am transgender, female to male, I am concerned this means I am being perceived as female. But it might mean that they are calling me honey because I look young to them (I am often told by others that I look twelve/thirteen years old). The aspie in me finds it hard to really know what is going on. I then start to get gender dysphoria. If I don't pass I need to do something to appear more masculine.

Then again, I am never called "Miss" or the dreaded "Madame". By male cashiers, I am never referred to by any title except for "have a nice day".

Feel free to post your issues too, and I can see if I can help.

I think it must have to do with region. I'm a cashier in a large busy supermarket in New England and I don't think I've ever heard any of the 40 cashiers call any male, over the age of 8, honey.

You're right, the male cashiers don't call anyone honey. Only the female cashiers call anyone honey; and then, only kids.

But this is New England and thinking about it; it may be that I'VE been called honey by a cashier or two when visiting in FL & SC. (Refer to my age in the sidebar!) In the Southeast I wouldn't be surprised to hear my gruff old exhusband be called sweetheart by some cashiers.

The cashiers in my store are trained to refer to customers as Mr or Ms Lastname, but the customers names show on our monitors for @ 3 seconds at the end of bank card transactions; so in practice, we call customers ma'am or sir.

I've never been confused as to which gender any customer has presented as. From time to time I've inwardly speculated whether occaisional very tall (over 6') large women are transgendered. Then I look closely at their hands; in all those cases I'm pretty sure that they were females from birth. Yeah, I'm nosey.

In some parts of the country they habitually call people "honey" or "hun". As to whether or not you pass for a man, post a photo and I'll tell you....there's a lot of LGBT people in my area so I've become very good at figuring out who's what.

It is pretty common for women to call young people "honey", male or female. It is an informal practice. What is weird is finding a male calling another male honey. I do not like calling anybody "honey", specially strangers.

I tend to use honey or hun to young men - only occasionally with women, and then usually only with women I know - it's an affectionate term, not female-specific at all, I'd say here at least that it's more common to use such terms with men.

I am a girl but I am a tomboy. I got mistaken as a 14 year old boy and address as a sir a lot. so i pay extra attention to what people call me too. I correct people when they call me a sir cuz i identify myself as a girl. I guess that's what you oughta do. Cuz if gender is a scale and you are not on the 2 extreme ends, chances are there is always people that's gonna get your gender wrong. Just tell them politely if they get it wrong. I think what the thing that determines your gender comes from your heart instead of your appearance. looking like a boy doesn't make you a boy in the inside. And looking like a girl also don't make you a girl. you can dress totally girlish and still identify as a boy. or vice versa. I think you should just dress whatever feels comfortable to you and ask other people to resepct that.

Yes. It's the same as saying "Kid" to a teenager; it's just a term of affection (even if it is somewhat degrading).

Most of the transmen I have met, I would never have guessed that they had transitioned; it was always a bit of a shock.

In my region of the US men of all ages were routinely called "Honey" by female cashiers and waitresses until quite recently. Now it sounds a little unprofessional, even quaint, but it certainly still happens.

I'm a guy and i have been called many things to that effect:
honney
poppet
pettle
flower
darling
sugar
sweetheart

I doubt it has anything to do with your gender. (unless it was a male that said it to you)