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Outcome of informing at work about AS

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namaste
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05 Sep 2012, 9:24 am

Ok i have been working at this place for more then a year now. i was thinking whether to disclose that i have AS.
Since my manager often ask me attend social do's and functions and i bunk giving excuses
also i feel threatened by co-workers so maybe if i disclose to my manager then she wont force me to attend events

anybody had bad experience after informing about AS


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Merceile
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05 Sep 2012, 9:41 am

I tried that once and it didn't work out at all. But I guess that depends on the kind of relationship between boss and employee or what kind of person your boss is. While my boss gave me more leeway (because he kind of had to) he was very resentful because i hadn't discolsed my "condition" in the job interview. So it really poisoned the whole work enviroment, because my coworkers didn't like me going to the boss for special treatment.
Telling one or two coworkers I liked worked out better for me. They looked out for me or helped explain away my weirdness ect or helped me out in social situations. Well soon everbody knew about my aspergers - thats just work gossip I guess.

I don't think there is a good way to do it, but I also see the necesity to explain. Good luck whatever you try.



Last edited by Merceile on 05 Sep 2012, 9:44 am, edited 1 time in total.

thewhitrbbit
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05 Sep 2012, 9:42 am

I question if they can force you to attend social events, but to be honest, your not going to advance your career if you don't attend these events.



namaste
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05 Sep 2012, 9:46 am

Merceile wrote:
I tried that once and it didn't work out at all. But I guess that depends on the kind of relationship between boss and employee or what kind of person your boss is. While my boss gave me more leeway (because he kind of had to) he was very resentful because i hadn't discolsed my "condition" in the job interview. So it really poisoned the whole work enviroment, because my coworkers didn't like me going to the boss for special treatment.
Telling one or two coworkers I liked worked out better for me. They looked out for me or helped explain away my weirdness ect or helped me out in social situations. Well soon everbody knew about my aspergers - thats just work gossip I guess.

I don't think there is a good way to do it, but I also see the necesity to explain. Good luck whatever you try.

ya i was fearing that only it could have dangerous repercussions


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namaste
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05 Sep 2012, 9:47 am

thewhitrbbit wrote:
I question if they can force you to attend social events, but to be honest, your not going to advance your career if you don't attend these events.

i didnt get it.......but i guess you are saying that by attending this functions i would not anyway suceed in my career.


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chiastic_slide
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05 Sep 2012, 10:47 am

For some jobs, its not a formal requirement but they expect you to go to their social events and will look down at you if you don't. It is like an unwritten part of the job contract they expect you to fulfil. I have experienced this when I have rejected the invite and after the event they act like I am not a team player because I didn't go out with them and get drunk and act stupid, even though it has nothing to do with my job performance. Thankfully I don't have to go out much with my job at the moment.



namaste
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05 Sep 2012, 11:36 am

chiastic_slide wrote:
For some jobs, its not a formal requirement but they expect you to go to their social events and will look down at you if you don't. It is like an unwritten part of the job contract they expect you to fulfil. I have experienced this when I have rejected the invite and after the event they act like I am not a team player because I didn't go out with them and get drunk and act stupid, even though it has nothing to do with my job performance. Thankfully I don't have to go out much with my job at the moment.

previously i went but i was feeling out of place with all that noise, dance, gossip going on...i would stand in a corner and watch.
i would eat alone in the corner also everyone would gather together for song and dance session i would be not included.
so i feel i was making a joke out of myself i dont think they will look with disrespect if i dont attend on the contrary i was
looked with disrespect, discontent by my colleagues when i attended.


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chiastic_slide
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05 Sep 2012, 12:24 pm

namaste wrote:
chiastic_slide wrote:
For some jobs, its not a formal requirement but they expect you to go to their social events and will look down at you if you don't. It is like an unwritten part of the job contract they expect you to fulfil. I have experienced this when I have rejected the invite and after the event they act like I am not a team player because I didn't go out with them and get drunk and act stupid, even though it has nothing to do with my job performance. Thankfully I don't have to go out much with my job at the moment.

previously i went but i was feeling out of place with all that noise, dance, gossip going on...i would stand in a corner and watch.
i would eat alone in the corner also everyone would gather together for song and dance session i would be not included.
so i feel i was making a joke out of myself i dont think they will look with disrespect if i dont attend on the contrary i was
looked with disrespect, discontent by my colleagues when i attended.


I see. If they are not going to disrespect if you don't attend then that is good. Sometimes it seems like a lose-lose situation whatever you do.



namaste
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06 Sep 2012, 8:10 am

chiastic_slide wrote:
I see. If they are not going to disrespect if you don't attend then that is good. Sometimes it seems like a lose-lose situation whatever you do.

after lot of trial and errors i have learned that not attending is the best answer for my problem


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