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what would you do if you find out that the girl you like is attracted to another guy?

note that there s no formal relation between me and the girl but I was talking and meeting her for good amount of time (in real not online!) and she was awlays keeping IM me and messaging and calling me daily so i thought that she likes me ....it appears i was wrong.

i asked her to who she s attracted most and she answered me .
the answer was another guy

^^ well yea ...even if i feel s**t right now but I guess that I have no other option .

Prince.

Ye of little faith.

Considering that the girl liked you enough to constantly want to talk to you, I'd say that there is agreater chance that she doen't want to admit that she likes you right now. It's possible.

Trust me.

I'm a pscychologist type person and res board advisor.

^^ please don't give me fake hopes , we all know that if there's no attraction ==> no chance .

the real challenge now is how to cut this "platonic friendship" with this girl after we both got used to each others/

uh...

no.

no cut.

you kidding?

if there's even a chance at friendship keep it.

are you nuts?

out of curi....how old are you Prince?

I agree, don't cut it off. You do that, she'll think you were only ever out to get into her pants, and if she starts thinking that, she'll make sure everyone she knows thinks that too. That kinda stuff can get outta hand real quick.

Take a break if need be, get yourself together, and then accept the fact that you've at least got a friend. I know it sucks, I've been there a few times myself. I've also seen what happens to guys who ditch a girl who wasn't "interested". Aspie or NT, the fallout can be far more than you really want to deal with.

You've fallen victim to the nice guy routine. Girls like to find a nice guy that is sensitive and a good listener then they IM or call him with all their problems to have someone to talk to, a sounding board more or less. They think you are a nice guy and they will not go out with nice guys. Trust me on this I see this with my female friends all the time. If they can't find a token gay boy to be their best friend then they find some shy nice guy that tags along with them everywhere and they never consider for a moment to date him. Hanging after this girl is unlikely for you to ever result in dating. Well you could muster up your courage right now and say "ah that's too bad you said you liked so & so because I was really hoping you would say me." Then tell her you would really like to date her. Either she will say yes or she will say no. But at this point you don't have anything to lose.

Do some reading on the nice guy syndrome and see how it destroys things for men. It's great to be nice to a woman, but if you are constantly IMming then you are just like another female friend to her. Girls IM all day or talk about every little thing so if you do this sort of thing with a girl she stops seeing you as a male and sees you as one of the girls.

I've seen this with my own female friends where we had one older single guy hang out with us all the time. He tried asking out two of them and was always hanging after the hope that he could somehow force one of them to marry him. Meanwhile they saw him as a weakling male because he didn't hang out with other guys.

Girls like guys that have a bit of mystery about them. They say on Oprah that they want a nice guy, but they won't marry or date a nice guy if they meet one. Nice guys are treated like doormats. You can still be a kind man without being a "nice guy". Try to be as masculine, mysterious and slightly aloof without seeming a prat. Talk to girls, but don't allow them to use you like you were their psychologist that they talk to all day about their problems. I bet that is what she is doing with you.

^^ I think you are absolutely right . Even tho I didn't always behaved "nice" with her ... in the contrast I behaved what I am ....but I think I was over-listening to her .

Prince.

Do what you feel you need to do.

But lemme tell yah something.

I'm 19.

I have female friends who I like and who I'm friends with, who I am attracted to. But that doesn't mean every time any of them get a significant other that I disown them.

My ex girlfriend and I still talk, she's a great friend, we hangout occasionally. less then I'd like to, but then again I'm in one state and she's in another.

So if you give up then you give up, but at the same time, you're gonna look like a coward in her eyes. If she likes you because you're the type of guy that's trustworthy, then not only is that cowardice but it's the fact that you give up too easily.

think about it.

--Doc Gamester--

Keep the friendship if you can, if you can't then don't.

Like if you find yourself obsessing over her then you probably need some space right now (I put off talking to this girl for about 2 years until I was able to become friends with her again). It's rough, but in the end it's the girl who decides who she wants to be with.

When I was 17 or so I went to prom with this girl I fancied (parents set it up) but at the dance I discovered she liked the singer the school booked for the dance (local band). This made me physically ill and I couldn't even be in the dance room and I had to go outside (even though it was snowing). So I basically stood outside for the entire length of the dance, well until my parents came and took me home (at the time I didn't like driving so I didn't have a license).

so?

I took my ex to all my dances my senior year.

as FRIENDS.