Why does dating have to be a game?

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Why is dating a game? What's worse is that it seems that the rules aren't even written down. There's just too many subtleties that make no sense to me.

I don't play the game, but I date. I break the "rules" often. This works fine for me.

If you don't want it to be a game, don't play it like it is.

Its driven by biological programming/impulses for evolution/competition. However, its not always a game, there are other forms of dating. You can find the unwritten rules on the internet, if you search enough.

It's not a game -- it's possible you are simply a repulsive person no one (sensibly) wants anything to do with!

It is a game for women cuz women know they have all the power, and they use that to see how much they can get out of you before leaving you high and dry. It's got f***all to do with being repulsive, and more to do with being taken advantage of.

Because it's designed to weed out the weak and inferior. We've turned 'love' into something that the animals do.

HMMMM. I smell resentment

This message definitely doesn't help. What did the OP do to deserve this assumption that he is repulsive?

Now to the OP:

If you treat dating like a game, then there will be winners and losers. there will also be cheaters and people trying to cut corners by being lazy. You will also feel like others aren't following the rules and that this isn't fair. This is what any game can be like. Perhaps if you want to treat dating like a game, then it might be best to choose not to take it seriously.

As for unwritten rules as you might call them, it's not always your fault either. Many people in here have complained in the past that they felt as if they knew and understood the rules only to see things changed out of nowhere at the last second. Bottom line is simple: people are a**holes and they don't care who they are a**holes to. Be thankful if an a**hole screws you over because you should learn from it.

Of course, the world is full of politically correct BS as well and people can often be quick to take offense to something someone else says as well. I'm kinda tired of it as well because when one person is quick to put you on the defensive in a scenario in which they feel offended, no amount of explaining what you meant will make it better either.

Because Tarantella/Starvingartist (I am 100% sure that JJ is one of those) is a sexist person who enjoys putting men down all the time.

If I was the OP, I would have clicked on Report.

Already did.

Can you give me examples?

I get that you are trying to get the TS to reflect on his own behaviour but this sounds a bit harsh and mean. You could have worded that a lot better.

I agree. It doesn't make sense. But it's part of NT way of relating. It seems to make sense to them. This is why I haven't been on a single date in 5 years. But sometimes I wonder if maybe I have been on dates but just don't realise it. People are very confusing plus there is some sort of non verbal communication that everyone except me is fluent in.

Oh, I'm sorry. I'm mostly referncing things like non-verbal communicating, and illogical rules like "only text/call after 3 days after the first date.". It makes me so frustrated.

I dont understand this either. I have really struggled with the unwritten rules of dating. I have also been in potentially dangerous situations.

Heres one I have really struggled with.
"Why dont you come over for a cuddle/watch a movie/dinner."
In my younger days I didnt realize that meant, "Lets have sex." Guys would be confused or even angry because they expected sex while I expected to watch a movie. If he wanted sex, why not be honest and not waste my time?

I havent been on a date in 8 mos, and I dont miss it. Im often single for 2 or more years at a time.

Is that an actual rule that you have to use or more of a strategy that might be in your advantage that you could choose to use.

It's like, there are different openings in chess but there's no rule saying you have to use a particular one, they're simply stragegies available to you.