What do you think?

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Hey everyone - I have not been on WP for years but I have a bit of a story and am looking for some opinions.

Background info: Up until a year ago I was never really interested in relationships, did not want commitment and as such I was more into hook ups - the primary reason being I felt I was not ready to commit considering my neurodiverse mind state, school, work, etc.

Anyhow about 2 and a half months ago I went to a birthday party to have a few drinks and immediately some girl introduced herself to me and started talking to me. I was not interested because she seemed rather trampy - showing off her strings, etc. She then started talking about how she would take me home, etc... anyhow she asked for my number and I legitimately got rid of my phone that week so I did not have a number. She then asked for my Facebook and since I was not interested I lied saying I don't have an account. So she gave me her number. I never called her back.

The next morning she found me on Facebook and added me. I accepted pretty much just to be polite and she sent me a message asking me what I am doing next weekend. I started looking at her profile and she was actually very good looking although there were A LOT of pictures with babies and I still did not want to hang out with her so I told her I was busy. We started talking a lot the week after - 100+ messages a day and I slowly started to like her, so I finally told her we can hang out although I only took her for a hike as I wanted to move slowly and cautiously.

During this walk I found her to be very polite and although she came dressed just a little provocatively, she seemed to be in order, saying that she was in school to become a youth counsellor, she rented her own place, etc. Certain red flags popped up though. She was saying that when she was 13 she tried to kidnap a baby with her friend, complaining to me that she only attracts "douches", saying that she had to take some fire prevention program because she set garbage cans on fire as a teen, and even went as far as saying that her friend poked holes in condoms to try to anchor men. To top it off she talked about how her ex-boyfriend would throw her into walls and how he is now stalking her.

This was a lot for me to handle... but because I started to like her I somewhat wanted another date and as such I asked if she would be free the next weekend. She said she wouldn't be. I was a little disappointed but we scheduled the week after. In between these dates though she messaged me a lot, sending me lots of videos of herself with babies. The second time we met we slept together (although kept it at that) and she told me she was bipolar and joked about drugging me with her medications which was a little off. Additionally she showed me a dress she wore when she apparently beat up her ex-boyfriend. She was still very sweet and caring though and I liked it a lot.

Afterwards I asked her if she wanted to hang out and she started to become flaky - the first week telling me she could not hang out because of the time of the month and then the second week she used a runny nose as an excuse. I started to ignore her or send her short messages because I was under the impression that she found someone else but she would reply with question marks and confused faces as to why I am being like this. I thought it was kind of obvious (even with my ASD). Eventually I called her and told her I am going to stop messaging her.

2 weeks later she asks how I am doing and I pretty much just ignored her - she was again very confused as to why I was ignoring her. I asked her why she is messaging me and again she was acting confused and she even asked if I wanted her to stop messaging me. Again I thought the answer was obvious. 1 week ago she started messaging me again and I talked to her a little bit but now have just stopped and ignored her again.

I have considered giving her a second go as it seems she is still into me although I am asking for a little bit of input from anyone who has had similar experiences. Like most people with ASDs - I have difficulty pulling out some of the subtle messages hidden here and there - aside from the obvious - that she has a colourful past. Any feedback appreciated!

She sounds pretty flaky. If you decide to go out with her, I think you can count on such fun times as explaining things to police officers, being offered prescription pills for recreation, unusual mood swings, maybe an unplanned pregnancy scare.....

Thanks for taking the time to look. I agree with you.

I was thinking playgirl/sugar baby myself...

And then she complained to me that she scares everyone off.

Well at least she's honest?! ! LOL

I know right... she said that on our first date - talk about red flag.

It's a VERY good thing she is honest then!

There are plenty of people out there I think who might appear like a decent, normal person on the outside, but after beginning a relationship it might take months or even years before all their hidden flaws show.

From sociopaths to manipulative liars to needy, dependent types, at least this woman has made it clear that you know what you're getting into.

I wouldn't recommend giving her a second chance, OP.

But it's up to you what you want to do.

Like I said at least she is open and honest about this stuff so you can make a judgement of her before dating someone like this...

Ok - thanks for the feedback. She has made it clear to me that this was her life in the past but we all know that at least some behaviours carry through from childhood to adulthood.

You brought up an interesting point though. If she has revealed this much to me so far, well who says that with time she wouldn't reveal even worse things. Ironically she said that she hit a teenager who had autism with a broom handle because he looked at her the wrong way and some court ordered her to write an apology letter (Canada with its stupid punishments....).

I pretty much plan on ignoring her the more I think about it...