Talking about Aspergers to supervisor

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Hello!

So, last week, after feeling a bit down for a while but trying to get back on the saddle, I decided to talk to my team leader (slash coach nowadays) about my experiences with Asperger. I mentioned it before and it's never really been an issue really, but it was still kinda awkward to talk about how it affects me and to formulate the things i struggle with. He was kinda cool about it though, and is willing to help me figure some stuff out. Best I could've hoped for, really, even though I don't think he really heard some of the things I tried to say.

I was in doubt for a while whether or not I should and could do this. I'm sure not everyone would be cool with it. Not really sure why I did it either. I think I'm really just looking for some feedback somehow.

Anyway... I was wondering if anyone here has done the same. Or if you'd consider / feel the need to do something similar.

I'm currently doing a study about this topic. Many people formally or informally disclose to their boss and then take the extra effort to try to get the boss to actually understand their form of autism. Some people think talking about it has helped and some don't. I can't talk about what I've observed so far because I'm still collecting data and will be for another month.

I can personally talk about what it was like as a person with a non-autism disability working with another disabled person FOR a non-disabled person. She didn't seem to understand either of our disabilities or accommodation needs, although she pretended to. I guess pretending is trying, in a way.

I'm sure other members can give better experiences.

I tried disclosing it several times. Talking to my bosses, talking to my co-workers or just trying to talk about it.
It never really worked very well.

I felt safe when I talked about it, but my co-workers never knew how to react to it. They would ignore it, change subjects or show a lack of understanding.

I learned this: It is humiliating to disclose the autism, and I will not do it again unless I am under a lot of stress.

It is your choice. It is a good idea to present the autism in a positive way. Tell them you are different, that you have some personality traits that is not the same as them. But don't talk too much about the darkest sides of autism: The mental illnesses, the unemployment or your social isolation. They do not want to hear that. They don't know how to relate to that.

You have told your team leader and I think that is enough. Don't tell other people at work.

If you want to read about it, try the book called "Aspergers on The Job" by Rudy Simone.

I don't think it's a good idea and I told my Aspie friend not to do it in school or work. I posted a sheet in a thread on AC (Aspie Central) that I had to sign at work asking what disabilities (if any) I had and "Autism" was one of the disabilities. It said in this document at least 4 times that the information that is disclosed will not be used against the person filling out the document. Whatever. If you believe that to be true, then you are only kidding yourself. Employers will use that information against you. And if you think that most co-workers will "understand", again I think you are only kidding yourself.

(My Aspie friend came out to the people he went to China with which were people from his college including instructors. I asked him how he was acting different that he felt like he had to come out and tell those people he had Asperger's and he said he was just acting shy and not talking very much. What? Who hasn't acted like that at some point? Even myself. All I can say is telling employers and colleges that you have Asperger's may come back on you in a negative way later on so I would really think about it before disclosing. My Aspie friend is self diagnosed so what if he is saying he has Asperger's and he really doesn't? Now he has put a label on himself that may hurt him in getting accepted into a certain college program or job position later on. Also, since they are now including Asperger's in with Autism, anyone who says they have Asperger's will automatically be put under Autism (not HFA) and that is definitely seen as a disability in the workplace.)

Do you all think you might feel different under certain circumstances? Like, the size of the team, maybe the type of company you work for?

I don't really feel like I've made a mistake, honestly. But I was hired after I was an intern for a while and they already knew my situation. I switched teams recently, that's why it's come up again.

This is my first job, so my experiences are limited.

I've done it but in a slightly different way -- I asked to meet with my manager to get a sense of how I was doing performance-wise and to ask that all taskings be sent to me in writing (ie via email), since I'm hopeless with oral requests.

It worked great, he also had some helpful suggestions, like carrying a notebook to write down the occasional verbal ask).

I've worked at an office now for the past 3 weeks, now being the 4th week, as a unpaid contract type of job just to gain experience in the line of work I hope to work in, in the near future. Although I can still look for work whilst doing this, I haven't disclosed my condition, at least not fully, i've only disclosed the negative effects of the condition, which is anxiety, and I wanted to just gain confidence in speaking to the public, and internal customers which is what I had trouble with in the past. So once I finish the placement/job I will have the confidence to do any job, and more of an insight of whats expected of working in an office environment.

I like this approach. Disclosing more commonly understood symptoms instead of an overarching condition that people don't get. It's also a good idea to tell people what you're uncommonly good at. I used to work with a guy who could read computer code like a book and see errors like a couple of black spots in a field of white. Unless you worked closely with him, you couldn't understand how easily he could fix things. If he had been more open with his abilities he might have been treated with more respect.

Yep....say that you sometimes have trouble with detailed instructions--rather than saying you have Asperger's.

Maybe yes, maybe no. If you're in the U.S., the Americans with Disabilities Act requires employers to make "reasonable accommodations" for staff with disabilities -- but you have to disclose your disability to your employer for the protections to kick in.

I've gone with the disclose-after-being-hired route and it has worked out well. The accommodations I requested over the course of several years were simple: written taskings (whenever possible), no staff (don't like managing people) and minimal dealing with clients (loathe it). I like being an analyst and loathe meetings/managerial stuff, so my employer, over time, created a "custom" position -- senior researcher (director-level research responsibilities and salary, so no bonus, with no staff).

I'm pretty sure my employer accommodates me because it helps their bottom line (they invested 3+ yrs and a ton of money training me out of grad school) but the ADA protections may have helped.

I'm glad you've had good experiences with disclosure. I mean that.

I hope many more autistic people benefit from disclosure, and from accommodations.

But, these days, in what may be termed the "lower echelons"--which many autistic people happen to work within--it's extremely risky to disclose that you have ANY disability. This is because, barring a union contract, the vast, vast majority of jobs in the US are performed on an "At-Will" basis. This means one could be fired, theoretically, for not following the same baseball team as the boss.

To prove discrimination, in these instances, is not impossible--but it's really difficult.

It's hard out there for people with disabilities. Advocacy will make it less hard over the coming years. But people have to think in the "here and now."

I live in an "at will" state, don't belong to a union and disclosed because the alternative was probably going to be worse -- "she's super-smart, not really a people person and an Aspie" is preferable to "she's smart but highly strung and terrorizes her staff".

Also, because I hit my Peter Principle limit (states that folks get promoted until they become incompetent) pretty early on -- if you're a really good analyst you get promoted to a managerial position (that involves little analysis but lots of, well, meetings and staff and clients).

The "lower echelons" thing never occurred to me. I've a specialized, in-demand skill set and employers thus far valued it more than my lack of people skills.

I don't see how hiding the fact that you have Asperger's is helpful. I have been accused of being on drugs in the past because of my unusual behavior. I found that people are generally understanding; plus the fact I am actually a good worker who not only likes to work by himself, but also doesn't require supervision is definitely a plus to a lot of employers.

As someone recently assessed by having Aspergers, as well as depression and anxiety.

I have told a few people in work including my supervisor, but I don't know what to say to other friends that I have.

It is clear that I am struggling at the moment, (more with long term effects of depression) but
I don't know what to say, I don't to tell everyone I have Aspergers, but at the same time, clearly they are concerned about me.

I am unsure if my assessment of Aspergers is helping as they are so many things going through my mind at the moment.

I expressed my intent to do such a thing on this very forum (oddly enough), but was advised against it because my employer would use it against me. Be cautious working your way through this minefield...

I've always chosen to proactively disclose that I'm an Aspie and it has always worked out quite well for me. My approach is to speak up shortly AFTER I'm hired.

My rationale for disclosing is that:

1. the alternative is objectively WAY worse. "She's super-smart, an Aspie and does much better if you provide your comments via email" is VASTLY preferable to "she's super smart, impossible to deal with and terrorizes her staff".

2. the ADA requires employers to provide reasonable accommodations to individuals with disabilities IF AND ONLY IF they are told about the disability.

3. employers do not provide accommodations to employees who don't request them.

4. employers are often happy to provide accommodations.

I was hired as a quant right out of grad school, was a really good analyst and got promoted pretty quickly -- and hit my Peter Principle limit (that you get promoted until you become incompetent) when I was promoted to manager. My employer also spent several years and a ton of money to train me.

(Yes, it's weird that being a good analyst results in getting promoted to a position that involves little analysis and a lot of meetings and supervising of minions).

I'm really good at analysis but not a "people person" -- supervising staff and dealing with clients are non-starters for me. So, over time, I negotiated a one-of-a-kind position for myself, director-researcher: all research, no supervising staff and as little contact with clients as humanly possible. I get a Director's salary but no bonus (because I don't have to acquire clients).

To be fair, I should probably note that I've a very specialized (and rare) skill set; work in an industry where it's easy to evaluate my work (read: how much money did the mathematical models I built make for the investment bank that employs me); and, where "not really a people person" is sort of par for the course.

In short, my employer's willingness to accommodate me is probably due, in part, to how expensive and time-consuming it'd be to replace me.