Pathological Demand Avoidance or Narcissistic Personality Disorder ?
I feel often traumatised, but i seem never to get any validation for anything;
the NPD-label, i can't put it on (no one would belief that!! it would just turn against me), and i've nowhere to go for the run part, i think there's abuse of threatening behaviour, but it's more a shield for anxiety. And it works so well, why change that?
I shouldn't be excusing here, definately he's not giving anything, but when he can make a show of it, "see me being good for giving you this?" even if it was the worse item around, or like last week a bag of old clothes, not even washed.
PDA or Narcissism? some quotes from elsewhere, or it gets too emotional and personal:
-PDA, at least in an adult, seems to resemble compensatory narcissistic personality disorder on many levels. Although I believe that years of being misunderstood and the consequent self-directed aggression that could bring about (if left undiagnosed) could lead to a reactive narcissistic personality in people with PDA.
-I found your post very interesting in that you say you see narcissistic traits in yourself. My son's Dad very much appears to exhibit narcissistic traits. But I also see that he is driven by fear and anxiety, and does not manipulate with an 'end goal' but more as a coping strategy. For instance he will not acknowledge my son has any problems, or rather he does but does not want to become involved with any of my sons assessments, or to have any involvement with the school. He had major problems himself at school, and still does in social situations/work. At least you are looking at and trying to deal with your own situation, my ex is doing his very best to keep his head well and truly buried in the sand. Unfortunately he lost his best ally and advocate (me) as our relationship ultimately ended with violent confrontation.
-Realising that the anxiety stems from the feeling of not being in control and that the aggression is a result of that can help you to deal with it better perhaps. Reassurance when angry, and treating it like a panic attack can help the anger episodes to abate quicker possibly. We have not made an adult PDA leaflet yet - perhaps we can get some ideas together?? There just isn't enough information/research yet.
& the rest is about children ofcourse, http://www.pdasociety.org.uk/forum#/dis ... pda-npd/p1
Could it be that the undiagnosed hide fairly often under demand-avoidance?
12 Aug 2016, 6:31 am
