Dealing with unreasonable people
28 Sep 2019, 6:13 pm
Hello,
I have a really hard time with unreasonable people especially those that I am very close to. I get manically angry and just want to smack some sense into them. I am reconsidering my relationship with my mom and thinking about cutting her out of my life when I am able to move out.
We had a big argument because dog barking really bothers me and my mom and step grandmother told me to leave the dog alone when she wouldn't stop barking. It is like they don't care that it bothered me and just want to let that little s**t do whatever she wants.
I was having this I am doing everything I can argument and mom said "No you are not you can get a job now" I had to remind her stupid ass that I have surgery at the end of October which will involve a month long recovery. She stated that some people just go straight back to work after surgery. Anyone have a parent make a statement that unreasonable? I would also appreciate any suggestions on comebacks because that was ridiculous.
I am on a waiting list for subsidized housing and mom seems to think that I am turning into one of those people who just lives off the system and doesn't try anything. She is minimizing how stuff effects me and making it out that I am just being a spoiled brat which pisses me off. Maybe I should ask her if she is becoming an extreme right wing Republican.
I am pissed with my mom and don't know what I have to do to prove myself to her and not hear the same s**t over and over again. I have even asked her what I have to do to never hear that again and she couldn't answer. I am thinking of asking her that question again next time it comes up and then telling her that until she has an answer of what I need to do to prove myself there is no point in saying that stuff.
My dad used to be that way but came to grips with reality it is as if my mom is now the one playing the role. I wonder who will play this role when I get old and my parents die, it just seems never ending and pervasive.
27 Oct 2019, 9:54 am
I have a really hard time with unreasonable people especially those that I am very close to. I get manically angry and just want to smack some sense into them. I am reconsidering my relationship with my mom and thinking about cutting her out of my life when I am able to move out.
We had a big argument because dog barking really bothers me and my mom and step grandmother told me to leave the dog alone when she wouldn't stop barking. It is like they don't care that it bothered me and just want to let that little s**t do whatever she wants.
I was having this I am doing everything I can argument and mom said "No you are not you can get a job now" I had to remind her stupid ass that I have surgery at the end of October which will involve a month long recovery. She stated that some people just go straight back to work after surgery. Anyone have a parent make a statement that unreasonable? I would also appreciate any suggestions on comebacks because that was ridiculous.
I am on a waiting list for subsidized housing and mom seems to think that I am turning into one of those people who just lives off the system and doesn't try anything. She is minimizing how stuff effects me and making it out that I am just being a spoiled brat which pisses me off. Maybe I should ask her if she is becoming an extreme right wing Republican.
I am pissed with my mom and don't know what I have to do to prove myself to her and not hear the same s**t over and over again. I have even asked her what I have to do to never hear that again and she couldn't answer. I am thinking of asking her that question again next time it comes up and then telling her that until she has an answer of what I need to do to prove myself there is no point in saying that stuff.
My dad used to be that way but came to grips with reality it is as if my mom is now the one playing the role. I wonder who will play this role when I get old and my parents die, it just seems never ending and pervasive.
What if YOU are really the one who is unreasonable? Yes, yes, what you do and how you react to people is reasonable and logical to you, but, an important adaptive social skill is how to appropriately respond to morons and other difficult people. Maybe, instead of blaming everyone else, you direct your brilliant mind on ways to respond to difficult people in a way that causes you less distress......
28 Oct 2019, 4:30 am
I have a really hard time with unreasonable people especially those that I am very close to. I get manically angry and just want to smack some sense into them. I am reconsidering my relationship with my mom and thinking about cutting her out of my life when I am able to move out.
We had a big argument because dog barking really bothers me and my mom and step grandmother told me to leave the dog alone when she wouldn't stop barking. It is like they don't care that it bothered me and just want to let that little s**t do whatever she wants.
I was having this I am doing everything I can argument and mom said "No you are not you can get a job now" I had to remind her stupid ass that I have surgery at the end of October which will involve a month long recovery. She stated that some people just go straight back to work after surgery. Anyone have a parent make a statement that unreasonable? I would also appreciate any suggestions on comebacks because that was ridiculous.
I am on a waiting list for subsidized housing and mom seems to think that I am turning into one of those people who just lives off the system and doesn't try anything. She is minimizing how stuff effects me and making it out that I am just being a spoiled brat which pisses me off. Maybe I should ask her if she is becoming an extreme right wing Republican.
I am pissed with my mom and don't know what I have to do to prove myself to her and not hear the same s**t over and over again. I have even asked her what I have to do to never hear that again and she couldn't answer. I am thinking of asking her that question again next time it comes up and then telling her that until she has an answer of what I need to do to prove myself there is no point in saying that stuff.
My dad used to be that way but came to grips with reality it is as if my mom is now the one playing the role. I wonder who will play this role when I get old and my parents die, it just seems never ending and pervasive.
What if YOU are really the one who is unreasonable? Yes, yes, what you do and how you react to people is reasonable and logical to you, but, an important adaptive social skill is how to appropriately respond to morons and other difficult people. Maybe, instead of blaming everyone else, you direct your brilliant mind on ways to respond to difficult people in a way that causes you less distress......
Or maybe she's dealing with someone who actually is excessively unreasonable. Why assume the worst with no evidence about someone you don't know? No to mention the unnecessary sarcasm. Apply your own "brilliant mind" to that.
_________________
"Donkeys live a long time. None of you has ever seen a dead donkey."
29 Oct 2019, 8:32 am
Whoa at the surgery comment... I mean yeah, some people do go back to work shortly after a surgery, but that depends a lot on what type of surgery it is. My mom got mad at me for taking only 3 months of sick leave after a brain surgery; she said I should've taken more.
Anyway, does your mom pay all the bills for you? If she does then it's understandable that she's starting to get frustrated considering your age. It's not your fault if you're doing your best, but she has a right to feel down for not being able to use the money for her own well being instead of yours.
