having catastrophic thoughts and predictions Come true

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About a year ago, after not telling A girl I was dating something, and more honestly being pessimistic about what I thought she would think of me caused her to break up with me.

I have autism and three previous relationships ended because three previous girls found out I had autism and They rejected me. And I have a tendency for being very pessimistic so even before the first girl rejected me I expected that she would reject me because of my autism and my friends convinced me to tell her and I have all told him that I was going to get rejected if I did so and I went against my feelings and I listen to my friends and I told the first girl about my autism and immediately she rejected me so did the second and third girl when I told him as well about my disability.

After having my prediction and my worst fear come true three times in a row I’ve vowed to never tell any girl about my disability ever again and if they work to find out they should would do so themselves without me telling them.

The fourth girl I was in a relationship with found out because she had a brother with the same condition I had and I was so much similar to him that she guessed correctly that I had autism and when She asked me if I had autism I couldn’t lie to her or hide it from her as I’m not a liar so I told her that I had autism and then she asked me why I hit it in and basically I told her the story of the three previous relationships and how when I’ she asked me if I had autism I couldn’t lie to her or hide it from her as I’m not a liar so I told her that I had autism and then she asked me why I hit it in and basically I told her the story of the three previous relationships and how when I have a bad feeling about something it always comes through like how I had a feeling about the three previous girls dumping me if I told him I had autism and I was proven right three times in a row and I thought the same thing was going to happen with the fourth relationsI have a I have a bad feeling about something it always comes true like how I had a feeling about the three previous girls dumping me if I told him I had autism and I was proven right three times in in a row and after that I told you that I vowed to never tell anyone I was in a relationship with about my disability for fear of being dumped.

The girl that got really offended that I would say such a thing about her and dumped me on the spot and I told the girl right to her face it looks like I’m right no matter if I tell someone about my disability if I don’t I’m always going to be dumped I’m gonna be single forever for all of eternity. Then she turned to me and said well I don’t wanna be with someone who is so negative. Not only did you lie to me but you have such a negative outlook on life maybe you really do deserve to be as lonely Specially if you have such a pessimistic view of everything.

I reached out to one of the girls who broke up with me after they found that I had autism and when I asked him bluntly why they broke up with me they told me that it wasn’t because of my autism but because after I told him I had autism and you really ask them iI rea I reached out to one of the girls broke up with me after they found that I had autism and when I asked her bluntly why they broke up with me they told me that it wasn’t because of my autism but because after I told The girl I had autism I immediately asked her if she was going to break up with me and she got upset that I implied that she might be in a ballast and I heard her feelings by asking her that question and she broke up with me.

She told me that I shouldn’t be so negative and always anticipate bad things. She was actually the third girl I dated and I told her about the two previous girls who dumped me which is why I asked her If she was going to break up with me her words were, I am not like those two previous girls and if you’re going to assume that I’m that type of person then clearly I am not right for you.

Despite profusely apologizing when she said no I had a bit of a meltdown and started swearing under my breath to which she said the way you’re acting right now I’m definitely not going to give you another chance and I just stormed out of the restaurant leaving her to pay the bill.

And the girl with autism that I was dating the one I mentioned recently broke up with me. I was so sure that she was going to break up with me that I told a few friends and family members that I had that I didn’t expect a relationship to last and I did everything in my power to make sure I did not fall apart even though everything seemed well and she was not upset with me and I wasn’t upset with her it was just my negative prediction that it was going to fall apart and I ended up being right and just out of the blue just a couple weeks ago she broke up with me just as I suspected it was going to happen and just before she broke up with me I was doing more and more for her to actually prevent this very outcome.

And it’s not only my relationships that have been always ending so poorly almost everything around me every time I have a bad feeling somethings going to happen no matter how badly I try to avoid it it happens regardless. Recently I had a feeling that one of my relatives was going to physically abuse me for no reason and I was in a really bad mood that day and no matter what I did to prevent it one of the relative hir me and I just snapped and I punched him.

Nearly anytime I have a pessimistic prediction or get paranoid about something it always comes true which only reinforces my way of thinking. This self-destructive thought the cycle that so bad that it landed me in the hospital because of severe anxiety in the thing I was worried about it come to pass after I got released from the hospital which caused me to become enraged and very hostile to my family since most of my anxiety and fear was centered about how my family would treat me came to pass and not only that but it was even worse and anticipated which caused my anger to boil over recently.

I don’t know why this is happening why every time I have a pessimistic thought or fear it always comes true No matter how badly I try to avoid it.