Absurd: "failure to form relationships" as a SYMPTOM

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One thing I'd really like to get off my check is certain random diagnostic sites for ASD/HFA claiming that one of the, ahem, "symptoms" is: failure to form [meaningful] relationships with others.

OK, maybe it's just my Aspie brain thinking that this is not technically correct, but seriously?!? Claiming that inability to form relationships as a "symptom" of ASD/HFA is about as logical as saying this is a symptom for people with a body odour condition, or chronic halitosis

You see the absurdity?

If anything, we can all agree that the actual symptoms are the lack of fluency in nonverbal communication, difficulty in intuiting others' thoughts, emotions, and motives, and ignorance of unspoken social rules. The "failure to form (meaningful) relationships with others" is a friggin' EFFECT of the above, not a cause or symptom.

THERE!! !! !

I completely agree with you. Plenty of people have problems forming meaningful relationships due to various circumstances beyond their control. Like they live in very intolerant areas & have something about them that makes them unpopular. One of the problems I've had with mental health professionals is that they tended to get my causes & effects mixed up.

Mainly it's a sign that can indicate ASD, is what I think they are going for

I somewhat agree. Too many common things are now being singled out as "specific" to people on the spectrum.

However, if it was stated as "Chronic inability to form relationships" as a POSSIBLE indication of ASD, it might be more acceptable.

It's a sign, not a symptom.

Signs are things that a third party could observe. A teacher or daycare worker might observe that the child isn't making friends even though they might not know the reason. Maybe the child can't tell them they're having trouble with intuiting other people's thoughts, etc., but the lack of friendships could be a sign that a psychologist might need to do an assessment.

Symptoms are things the person can report on their own in assessment, by describing their inner experience or undergoing standardised tests.



In regular medicine a sign of a cold might be coughing. Strangers can detect that from a distance without asking questions.

A symptom of a cold might be that your throat feels scratchy or you're having trouble breathing through one nostril, or maybe the doctor will hear crackling in your lungs. You're reporting or providing that data on your own.

My difficulty forming relationships was the biggest red flag for my ASD. It's not by any means my only symptom, but it's the one that has caused me perpetual disappointment, stress, and loneliness. It's the symptom that tips my ASD from "a collection of eccentricities and personality quirks" into "disorder."

Especially when I participated in certain hobbies for years where I heard many stories of "I've made so many friends thanks to participating in this hobby" whereas I didn't make ANY lasting friends through the hobby despite a great desire to do so.