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Tamaya
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18 Jun 2025, 6:14 pm

This is my first thread here (...bit nervous)

My life timeline seems to go like this:-

Age 22 months - Potty-trained
Age 30 months - Started preschool
Age 4 - Started school
Age 8 - Got diagnosed with AS :roll:
Age 11 - Started puberty
Age 13 - Started periods
Age 16 - Left school
Age 17 - Started college
Age 18 - Left college and claimed unemployment
Age 20 - Got driver's license
Age 22 - Got first paying job
Age 24 - Met love of my life
Age 26 - Got engaged
Age 27 - Moved out of parent's house and started new job
Age 31 - Lost my mother :cry:
Age 32 - Got diagnosed with ADHD
Age 35 - Here I am now...

I'm interested in seeing your timelines, if you can remember roughly. You can put whatever milestones you want or anything that you call milestones even if they aren't to others.


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My diagnosis story and why it was a traumatic experience for me:
viewtopic.php?f=35&t=416910&start=1056#p9695026

Please notify me if there's a spelling mistake or an obvious autocorrect error in my posts.


babybird
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19 Jun 2025, 4:55 am

Do I have to do it all in one post


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kadanuumuu
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20 Jun 2025, 1:15 am

Maestra Tamaya,

I like your first post here, but I am a bit anxious to put milestone detail here.(perhaps one of the downsides of working in ict security) my apologies. If we ever meet up (virtual or otherwise) I'll gladly share.
My sincerest condolences for he loss of your mother.

I'll share some highlights:
My dad left when I was 5
My Mom lost herself to alcohol
and passed away when I was 18.
Soon after my brother lost himself to drugs.
I crashed hard several times in my life, to the point that at one time I was job-, home- and penny-less.
but 3 full blown burnouts, a wife, 3 amazing children and a lot of time later I'm still here. :)

Kind regrads,
Kada



Last edited by kadanuumuu on 20 Jun 2025, 4:32 am, edited 1 time in total.

traven
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20 Jun 2025, 2:00 am

hi Tamaya, i'll try a very short version

@4 - school/KG
@6 - do not go to grade 1, go to 2
@11- 'bridge'class, then prep highschool for going to uni
@16-18- problems at home, thrown out
@18-24 - balancing act between quiet life and drug life
@24 - drivers licence & work
@25 - baby (planned, but things got again out of hand in the process, woman shelter)
------ hub out of institute, work, first in the parking lot then truck/lorry driver
@35 - move to house in france (cash)/fixer upper -luckily the house in nl got sold quite profitable
@40 - start of farming (sheep) before that and overlap; goats and cheesemaking, &&&&&

now ---stopped commercial farming, only can't get it officialized(yet), legal hoops & obligation of smartphone,
:scratch: :shrug:



Tim_Tex
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20 Jun 2025, 2:33 am

5: entered Kindergarten
11: finished elementary school, entered junior high
14: finished junior high, entered high school
17: first girlfriend
18: graduated from high school, entered community college
19: got cheated on by aforementioned girlfriend, first summer job
20: moved to current house, second summer job
21: got drivers' license
22: internship, second girlfriend, got 2-year technical degree
23: hired back full-time from internship job
24: bought first car in my name
26: second relationship ended (she and I are still friends)
27: left job, returned to college to work on my bachelor's degree
27-30: Most heartbreaking romantic pursuit of my life.
29: lost virginity in FWB situation, got bachelor's degree, began job search
31: second full-time job (first in private sector), let go after two weeks
33: third full-time job, again, let go after two weeks. Swore to never apply to contract work again.
35: took Java class, got an A in it
39: adopted Penny (my dog)
39-45 (current age): began studying data science and AI technology independently, received four certificates thus far.
41: long-time friend cuts contact over politics


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Jakki
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20 Jun 2025, 5:52 am

Well if I could put all that down here even, It would be very depressing,still trying to get better and get a higher perspective on my life. That might allow for more miles of smiles ahead. :D


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Lost_dragon
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20 Jun 2025, 7:23 am

Age sixteen: Moved to a new town. Fresh start. Made new friends. Started BTEC college. This is really the point where I start to break out of my depression. I start to take better care of myself and my life. However, progress is not a straight line and I am still struggling at this point. I start to care about things though, I'm not just in survival mode anymore.

Eighteen: Started University. Foundation course before starting my degree.

Nineteen: Moved out to live closer to University. Joined an improv comedy group. Made friends with people in the LGBT uni society. I haven't quite mastered the art of independent living but I'm taking my first steps in that direction. I confront my inner demons and overcome my aversion to physical contact.

Twenty: Unfortunately, my time at uni is cut short due to the rise of Covid. The rest of my degree is taught via zoom and we communicate with each other by using sticky notes to write words on the windows. Time blurs together as I spend most of my time in lockdown in bed, somewhat listening to my lectures.

Twenty-two: I graduate on a random Thursday. Then I move back home.

Twenty-three: It no longer feels like home. I start my first job and then leave my first job. Depression starts creeping in again.

Twenty-five: After a really bad time job searching, I find a new temporary job. I start driving lessons again but this time with a good instructor. The urge to move out is stronger than ever.

Twenty-six: I start a new job. Another temporary role. I map out a detailed plan on moving out and continue looking for work. I start making an effort to get out more.


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Tamaya
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23 Jun 2025, 3:24 pm

Interesting. :)

Do you feel a lot of your milestones were/are average, or below or above? I consider mine fairly average, except for starting paid work - not many people reach age 22 before starting their first paying job.


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My diagnosis story and why it was a traumatic experience for me:
viewtopic.php?f=35&t=416910&start=1056#p9695026

Please notify me if there's a spelling mistake or an obvious autocorrect error in my posts.


shortfatbalduglyman
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25 Jun 2025, 10:16 pm

0 born
12, SAT, bullying, menstruation
18 first job, ucsd
21, gender therapy, academic dismissal , car stolen
24, started testosterone, BA
33, menopause
37, home Depot



ColleenArtisan
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03 Jul 2025, 6:17 pm

This might be long (I’m old AF, lol…)

6 kindergarten
7 grade 1. Not doing well. Mostly bored in class, daydream and fall behind
8 grade 2. Realize I’m not a boy. Can’t say anything to anyone about it.
. Bullied throughout school. Everyone thinks I’m weird. Move a lot.
13 high school. Suicidal.
16 “graduate”. Still suicidal.
17 run away from home, hitchhike across the country.
18 quit school, do odd jobs. Still living at home.
19 first apartment. Not ready.
20 fall in love. Move back home.
21 attempt to go to university. Quit by March break.
22 computer programming course
23 get married
24 suicide attempt
25 first child.
27 second child
30 third child (also unemployed)
42 longest job ever (22 years)
55 finally come out as trans
56 estrogen, move out of marital home, start social transition
57 gender surgery
61 diagnosed with severe depression and anxiety. Start disability leave
65 retirement. Disability benefits end, no other choice.
Also sever my left quadricep tendon.
69 now. Found out I’m also autistic.

Lots of life-altering milestones.

Colleen



Bensnyder91
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11 Jul 2025, 9:56 am

Mine is a bit fuzzy...

Got diagnosed in elementary school

Got held back a year in elementary school.

Middle School: begin to feel increasingly isolated from everyone around me, thanks in part to well-meaning attempts at trying to 'fix' my social skills making me feel like I was always going to be that weirdo who would never fit in and who everyone didn't want to be around, but they won't to come out and admit to it in a way I can grasp, leaving me clueless thanks to aforementioned lack of social skills.

Due to a mix of fear of messing up and pride (I had a inflated sense of ego due to my aspergers and Special Interests making me more knowledgeable in certain areas) I retreat ever-more into novels and games, which in retrospect does nothing to help the aforementioned social issues.

Discover porn and 'related' activities' in late Middle school/early High School, get addicted to dopamine release and as a substitute to filling the hole of being increasingly lonely and isolated but not realizing it. Parents install internet blocker at home to try and stop things with mixed success. I feel increasingly helpless in face of what is a growing addiction to porn and general screen addiction. But am too ashamed/think this is natural/don't want to admit I have a problem to talk about the first with anyone or realize what is even happening with the second one.

Graduated High school in 2010.

Started Community College in 2010 in what was supposed to be a short two year liberal arts major before moving onto a Real College. Begin seriously dating my second girlfriend. Begin working part time at what will be the first of several jobs.

Porn and screen addiction continues to grow.

2012-ish Unknowingly made my then-girlfriend my Special Interest and drove her away by being too intrusive and needy. Got more depressed, fall into vicious cycle with the screen and porn addiction. My healthy mentally and physically became terrible, which affected my college and job performance, which then increased the aforementioned addictions.

Feeling that I'm never going to amount to anything and will die alone begins to creep in and intensifies over the next few years. Begin spending time in a sort of 'mental time machine', where I imagine how things would have gone for the better if only I'd done Insert Things Here.

2013 Switch majors to business, still in community college.

Father is diagnosed with cancer in my third year at community college after years of warning signs that doctors ignored. These revelations do nothing for my mindset.

Manage to graduate community college in 2016 by skin of teeth. Dad is still alive, but increasingly frail. I try to help as best I can, but feel ashamed and a failure whose done nothing but let him down. Mental health remains bad.

Late 2017: Father commits suicide in backyard with gun. Leaves behind a journal, in which he allegedly says some unkind things about me and others- I intentionally avoid learning the details; my mom and family tell me not to take it personally, as he was very sick and not in his right mind towards the end. I desperately try to cling to this reassurance.

2018: manage to get assisted housing, social security and so on thanks to my mom pushing for it. Feel isolated and lonely. Feel like I've made all the wrong choices in life, that there is no hope for me and that I will die alone and forgotten. Become increasingly depressed and afraid of the future and what will happen to me, but feel powerless to change it or myself. Spend far too much time then in healthy in mental time machine and distracting myself with fiction of the normal kind but also increasingly the NSFW sort

2020: COVID, lose part time job. Avoid job-hunting to try and fix myself mentally, though do to apathy and screen addiction, this spends a lot of time spinning its wheels.

2022: begin conversion to Orthodox Christianity. Fully convert a year later. Begin making strides against various additions (screen/dopamine, porn)

2024: begin to make some strides against my various addictions, but are still troubled by them. Still feel depression and fear for my future, feel increasingly certain that I will die alone and that no woman would want to marry someone like me in a world where relationships feel increasingly transactional and out of touch with reality.

2025: being making serious strides against screen addiction and porn addiction. Only to find out with Trump's Big Beautiful Bill I might lose my apartment and one source of pride. Feel increasingly frantic and growing depression, praying to God for help and trying to find a way out. Feelings of being a failure and hopeless continue.



fromandromeda
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02 Aug 2025, 4:31 am

ColleenArtisan wrote:
8y.o. grade 2. Realize I’m not a boy. Can’t say anything to anyone about it.

Colleen



Gosh ! same for me;
Realizing at 8 that "His Highness" has made a mistake by putting you in a boy's body makes all your strange AS differences (incl. shame, isolation, etc.) to be self-interpreted as a result of this "initial gender mistake" , and may lead to a risk of much later diagnosis, imo : you have a massively plausible, concrete and obvious reason to be strange.

This also means multiple layers of masks, promising a beautiful life of metaphysical exhaustion

Would so much like to share.



Sweetleaf
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02 Aug 2025, 4:57 am

I am so beyond sick of hearing that word or the even worse made up word wokeism, I am going to vomit.

Idk with all the MAGA posturing of calling people snowflakes, they are being really super special snowflakes so offended by 'woke' federal documents can't even use the term woman or diversity. But any MAGA will tell you it's the democrats censoring things.

But what can you expect from an administration that decided to remove science from the EPA, an organization that kind of depends on science. You know what other regime didn't like science....well unless it was cruel, the nazis that's who.


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ColleenArtisan
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02 Aug 2025, 9:23 am

fromandromeda wrote:
ColleenArtisan wrote:
8y.o. grade 2. Realize I’m not a boy. Can’t say anything to anyone about it.

Colleen



Gosh ! same for me;
Realizing at 8 that "His Highness" has made a mistake by putting you in a boy's body makes all your strange AS differences (incl. shame, isolation, etc.) to be self-interpreted as a result of this "initial gender mistake" , and may lead to a risk of much later diagnosis, imo : you have a massively plausible, concrete and obvious reason to be strange.

This also means multiple layers of masks, promising a beautiful life of metaphysical exhaustion

Would so much like to share.


Thank you. Yes, I’ve had a very “interesting” life, to say the least. I’ve even written a musical about it. Hope someday it can be produced for the stage. Funny thing, when I began transition, my brother asked if, rather than being transgender, I might be “on the spectrum”. I hotly denied it. But here I am, trans AND autistic! Joke’s on me!

Colleen



elfdrift
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29 Aug 2025, 3:24 pm

Trying to make some sense:
0 I was born.
3 Kindergarden
5 I started primary school. Teacher considered me hopeless and unteachable. Started reading comics.
8-10 At this time I knew I had a hard time with other children and making friends, felt different.
11-14 Middle school. I became very quiet and withdrawn.
15-19 Changed school, but had to repeat year. Made one friend.
19 I graduated with delay, because I couldn't complete all courses on time due to depression.
20 Didn't know what to do, but started a university degree. Dropped out after 9 months.
22-23 Civilian service working in archives. Drew more comics.
25-27 Moved country for art school and graduated at 27. Met girlfriend in second year.
27-29 Various short temp jobs in catering, some freelance work. Never had enough money and lived from parents support. Claimed unemployment.
30-31 Made some money from art. Had a breakdown.
32 Moved back home and enrolled to MA. Got driver's lisence.
33-35 During covid, therapy through university councelling, diagnosed with anxiety and depression. Quit drinking. Finished my degree, 2 years delay.
36-37 Got a 0-hour job and started volunteering in bookshop once a week. Referred to get assessed for ASD or adhd, put on a waiting list.
38 (Now) First full time job.


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Fishyfisherton
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08 Jan 2026, 4:27 pm

One of my favourite bits of Avatar lore is the "songcord", a knotted cord/string with beads that symbolise each major life event that the na'vi add beads to over time. It also adds lyrics to a song about a person's life that is sung by family members at their funeral while they hold the songcord like rosary beads. This reminds me of that. OK nerdy tangent over, If I were to make a songcord (I want to), these are the beads I would include:

2nd jan 1993, I was born
Age 3: started nursery, lifelong connection with mermaids begins roughly here
Age 4: birth of brother
Age 5: bugs life released, became obsessed with it
Age 6: death of brother
Age 7: birth of second brother, also started brownies, broke my arm
Age 9: birth of sister
Age 11: diagnosed with aspergers, left primary school, moved house, started high school and girl guides
Age 11: discovered my bisexuality
Age 12: met my then best school friend and first love. Became obsessed with the band tatu.
Age 14: school bully got expelled after I hit her
Age 16: left school and started college, discovered bonobos and became interested in other apes (life changing), entered furry fandom, release of avatar (favourite films)
Age 16-18: suffered severe panic attacks and anxiety and got put on meds, quit college
Age 18: first real relationship and loss of virginity (with a man), release of planet of the apes reboot series (other favourite films)
Age 19-21: developed and recovered from anorexia
Age 21: left home and had a really great year, took part in furry fandom irl and made friends who I still have, joined therian community as bonobo person
Age 21-22: volunteer job at the zoo and got fired for being awkward towards public
Age 22: first furry convention
Age 23: split up with boyfriend
Age 23-27: changed name and socially transitioned to an androgynous man type thing
Late 20s: detransitioned
Age 24: lost lesbian virginity
Age 25: first relationship with woman, became attached to her young son, also bought first mermaid tail
Age 26: got into lifting, split with girlfriend
Age 27: death of favourite grandma, bought a fursuit
Age 29: first ever plane journey
Age 31: first tattoo, quit anxiety meds, dad diagnosed with cancer
Age 32: death of dad, changed name back to birth name
Year 33 has just begun so no major developments yet

I don't think everything would get a bead but the eras would atleast.


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