Closure and apologies

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I want closure

I feel like I deserve an apology. Angela w and Angela d had the nerve to tell me to sweep the whole parking lot in 30 minutes. They told me that plenty of times and I just tried to accept it because I was afraid that the boss was on their side. They started telling me that in April and I didn't tattle to ASM gabe until August

No good communication
No etiquette
No redemption

Those lil girls get away with everything

Patience ....?

I think the days where people were courteous enough to apologise has sadly gone

The problem is is people can't accept they were wrong so an apology doesn't really come into it for them

I just call them inconsiderate and rude

If I've had tiffs with people but they became guilty and owned up to their wrongdoings and were willing to apologise and put it behind them, it proves that they were decent people to begin with but just happened to not see eye to eye on everything with me. So I'm also willing to own up to my wrongdoings to them, apologise and move on too (and then feel bad that I ever disliked them in the beginning).

But you get some people who behave like a**holes all the time and never own up to being wrong (unless they pretend to in a manipulative way just so it looks like they're doing the right thing), and are never willing to forgive or move on. Those kinds of people I distance myself from these days and only talk to the decent folk.

You're right
Decent people know how to apologise

It's called having good social skills to know when it's time for an apology

Yes. I mean I know I don't always have the emotional skills to deal with certain things and can fly off the handle if I feel under threat, but I actually consider myself to have better social skills than I do emotional skills, because my social skills allows me to know who's good and who's bad (although I also have the social skills to understand that people aren't just either good or bad, but I mean I still know who's more genuine and who prefers to be an a**hole, towards me). I can work out people's intentions through body language and recognising patterns of behaviour from them. What I can't always work out is how to deal with the "bad" people, and bullying can just send me into meltdown mode because it gets me angry and upset and anxious (this is where I consider myself to lack emotional skills).

I also have the social skills to understand how to not control who others can and can't talk to. So if someone at work doesn't like me but my friends still talk to them, I don't get angry or upset with my friends for talking to them, because I know that just because my friends are talking to someone I hate, it doesn't mean they're being bad friends. You can't stop people from talking to someone just because you don't like that person, unless they let themselves be poisoned by the bad person against you. But I'm talking about when people still like you the same but just happen to get on with the person you dislike.

Of course I can be manipulated if there's people who are really good at manipulating, and I mean really good, but those people are usually narcissistic or sociopaths, etc. Those sorts are the sort to commit a serious crime and somehow get away with it in court through excellent lying and manipulation.

Oh, and lastly, while I can have good social skills (cognitive and emotional empathy), I can be dumb when it comes to intellectual knowledge. So I tend to "follow the herd" about things like politics and facts and stuff, because I'm not the most knowledgeable person. That's where I can screw up, mostly online.

It's a learning curve mate

and then on saturday when i told head cashier angela that i was going on break, she had the nerve to tell me that i had already taken my second break. so i told her that that was not correct and "it's on video tape". she had the nerve to say "ok".

i am so paranoid of getting made redundant.

if she didn't believe me, she could've told supervisor angela to write me up or made me redundant for "Time Theft" or something like that... i had not already taken my second break, i didn't have "proof". home depot on videotape, and i do not have the moral or legal "right" to access the video tape. head cashier or supervisor (or anyone else) from home depot could've refused to look @ the video tape. that is not illegal. home depot could do anything it wants, legal or illegal, and nobody could do anything about it, short of winning a civil lawsuit. home depot has its own lawyers, and i think they are so spectacular @ their jobs, that "logic could be used to justify anything".

(rolls eyes)
(puke)

angela d owed me an apology for that. as usual, she didn't even apologize. i deserve a consolation prize. like ten "get out of write up free" cards. or maybe she should've gotten written up. something like that.

constantly overpowered outnumberd outsmarted

I always apologize.
I already know that nine out of ten times I'll mess up the interaction!

At least those who suffer from this understand that it's not my intention (at all).

I say thank you often.
Because everyone, or almost everyone, takes it for granted that you should receive without ever saying it.

Talking in a friendly way is hardly possible for me: I can't do it.
If I say something, I believe it. Otherwise, it's very simple: I don't say it.

Arguing: Huh!
After a while, I don't even remember why.

Resentment, that also tends to only create unnecessary stress.

After a while...

If you want to live peacefully, the best way is not to feel it.

Do we apologize because we have better social skills?

Then I have a social IQ of 1000!

No; we apologize because it's right to do so if we're not right.

Being human: we make mistakes.

Unless you're an arrogant person, apologizing is more than welcome.

Then you don't even see each other in a forum.

Let alone communicate...making a mistake and not apologizing.

Or thinking you've made one and not apologizing.

I don't like that mental attitude.

Arrogance.

Then behind those keyboards are people like us. Perhaps hypersensitive to a bad interaction. If something isn't very polite, it can always be resolved politely.
Maybe apologizing isn't a bad thing, eh?

no consolation prize

i should get:
"get out of write up" cards
extra break time
extra sick hours
angela w and angela d writing a letter of apology and posting it in the lockerroom

angela w and angela d deserved to get made redundant. i find it hard to imagine the got any disciplinary action

they get away with everything
(puke)
(rolls eyes)

It sounds like the Angelas enjoy getting a reaction out of you.
Try to be calm and nonplussed about everything.
Impossible task in 30 minutes? "I'll try my best. Thanks for letting me know."
They say you already took a break? "Thanks for prompting me to double-check. Let's see... I definitely only took one break."
Then exude confidence and kindness. "Did you have a nice weekend?"
In the beginning they may laugh at you. You don't get to control the tone of our conversations! But actually you do get to control the tone of your own conversations. Soon they will be quiet.

I think what he writes makes sense.

Try to do as suggested.

If you lose your temper, you could even lose your job.
*Perhaps they're trying to get *You* to make a mistake and leave.

It could be some kind of mobbing.

A question, if I may.

Do you have any chance of promotion or none?

Because it could change things and in any case you'll have less to do with people...of that kind.

If, however, you have other opportunities for long-term, concrete work, and you don't feel comfortable there (it seems obvious to me), you can first calmly find another job and then leave as per the contract (be careful if there are restrictions on communicating the timeframe for resignation, if applicable).

*Avoid interactions with these people, especially when absolutely necessary.

Where you can't: I completely agree with the advice he gave you stickbugette

Agrees with Stick baguette from above also. And am believing from a Quora article, they seemed to assess that people with Higher Intelligence Quotient factors spologize much more readily, when a mistake on their part is
percieved/ recognized by theirselves .