Does everyone spend 20s drinking, having sex, partying etc?

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I'm in my 30s but I still can't shake off these thoughts that it's a waste of life if someone gets to their 30s and hasn't done much socialising with a drink, having a certain number of casual experiences with women, partying and so on between 20 and 29. I went out a few times to pubs for a drink and talking, never had any one night stands and went to only one or two clubs which I didn't much really. By late 20s I went abroad once a year with my dad and stepmum and passed my driving test. I do still struggle to accept and appreciate those accomplishments because I can't stop feeling as though I did "nothing".

Only if you're trying to tick boxes on some kind of generic life experience template. Much of which is BS anyway, and drunken sexual encounters with strangers are one of the most over hyped things of all time. If it was meant for you, you'd have found it. I remember the first days of my apprenticeship, there's about 15 of us, good number of 16yo school leavers leaning towards nerdy (me inc) and a few 17-20, the self established ringleaders are going around the group, trying to make others squirm asking about the "V" card. Now we're a "nice" group selected for employment and training investment, there's no real louts and you'd bet your last $ there's a good few cherries to be popped, but only one unashamedly replies yes I am (so what)... And they thought "they" were the ones holding some upper hand! Do f off.. I've always found BS lad culture excruciating, and it just being assumed I want participation, a personal slight.

That's not to say I don't drink beer and chase women... But that's my own business ... Now I've done drunk far too much in my life and having to reduce it, which hasn't been as easy as I'd like, problems are always about perspective. And there's only one woman I'm allowed to chase these days, but I'm happy about that. Upset and a little lost though, that as I type this, she's 10,000 miles away and fast asleep. And when she's awake I'll be asleep, because Australians are stupid like that.

And anyway you're only 30, you're barely an adult, beat your own path, you haven't gone after plastic things; that probably makes it more likely you'll find a soulmate. I was very lost when I was 30. The "lads" will still be acting like schoolboys living their lives through their mates tawdry embellished BS into their 60s, and whining about their nagging wives.

"Hic"

Did

Looking forward to restarting that in my 60s

Well I can't say that's how I'm spending them.

Alcohol is overrated. Whilst I do like a pint of beer, if you have too much you get headaches, feel sick, get fat, need the toilet etc.

Sex is much more fun .

I was not happy in my 20's. I'm sort of better in my 40's but still not great.

I spent much of my 20s studying math.

I spent my entire 20s, playing catch-up, "waiting to develop naturally"...

... And it did literally nothing.
Still stuck on a loop that whatever years of experience I have do not count.

I've only taken risks experimenting with meds at late 20s.
Only started having progress with myself since then when I discarded the idea that "I'm too young" or some crap.

I should've started at 18 instead of 28.

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I peaked 30-35

No

At times yes but it was pretty mild compared to some people I used to know.

I definitely relate. I spent a large portion of my life thinking that I should be out there partying and getting laid. Then I realized I'm just not built for that as an introverted grey-ace. I don't know what percentage of people spend their lives living like that, but I have a feeling the majority of people spend their 20's working and studying with the occasional night out with friends. The party lifestyle is mostly something that was made up for movies. It doesn't actually exist in the form that Hollywood presents it in. Or maybe it does exist but it's something that only rich kids do.

I live in a boring area with barely any nightlife. Even if there was much to do, I still wouldn't care because that kind of lifestyle never interested me.

I did go a bit wild in my 20s, but a lot of the people I met At It were significantly older than me.

My observation is: it's never too late to go a bit wild.

It will be there waiting for you if ever you feel it is right for you.


Editing to add: it often happens in the 20s for financial reasons. A lot of people enter the workforce at this time and finally have a bit of disposable cash. Then they drop out 30s-ish as they partner up and have children. But plenty of other people follow other trajectories.

Some look back at it and it's a blip, barely significant. For others it means a lot. Lots and lots of people just never enjoy it.

There are as many potential trajectories as there are people.

I guess I was having sex in my 20s, and I first met my husband at age 24. But I wasn't out drinking or partying, not ever. I went out to the pub with my brother and his friends a couple of times when I was 22 but I didn't get drunk or anything. I was home by 9.30. It just seemed easier for the others to stay out later and more regularly, because they drank alcohol. I just cannot bring myself to get drunk, because of my Emetophobia. I am that terrified of being sick. When you're drunk, time goes quicker and you don't feel so bored or self-conscious. I'd like that. But not the possible after-effects of a hangover.

I love my mother very much but I think her RSD poured on to me. When I was about 18 or 19 I wasn't bothered about going out clubbing at all. But when my same age cousins were discussing their clubbing nights together, my mother got upset because they hadn't invited me or even asked me out of politeness or anything. She felt hurt for me and I wondered why it was such a big deal. I kept saying, "Mum, I don't mind, really." But her hurtfulness for me sort of projected itself on to me (forgive me if that isn't the right word in this context), and I turned bitter and resentful for not going clubbing or not being invited out clubbing with my peers. I kinda wished my mother hadn't turned it into an issue in the first place, because I wasn't close to those cousins anyway and we only saw them at occasional family gatherings, and I wasn't into clubbing anyway - until my mother began making a fuss about it all.

Not that I'm putting my mother down or anything. She was a wonderful mother and I so badly miss her and wish she was still alive. She had mental health problems - anxiety, depression and RSD - so she couldn't help being sensitive. So I'm not blaming her like it's her fault or anything. But I'm just saying that if she hadn't got so sensitive about my wellbeing then I might not have taken it out on myself for not doing the things expected of me by society.