Living up to dating standards in the modern age.

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The harsh truth when it comes to dating is that everyone has standards of one sort or another. Another harsh truth (at least for me personally) is that I typically do not meet these standards. I do not have a ton of friends or an active social life; I am not currently employed (I certainly do not make a ton of money), I do not have any relationship experience, I live with my parents, I am autistic- I will stop there but I imagine the list could go on.

I do not beat myself up over this reality. I am who I am. I am not in any way ashamed over who I am or my lifestyle. I am proud of who I am and have worked very hard to achieve everything I have achieved (I am not one to list my accomplishments).

I am also trying to put myself out there and start dating again. My last date was in 2017. And I never had many dates to begin with. One piece of advice I have often been told is to date other autistic women. This is certainly something I am more than open and happy to do.

I guess my question (mostly to women with autism on here) would you date someone like me? I am not asking if you would date me, I am asking would you consider dating a guy if you knew those facts about his life?

I certainly know I am asking for a lot at this point. But also does anyone have any advice in how I can sell these facts about me better? I am not in the least bit ashamed of who I am or my lifestyle. I have worked very hard and accomplished a great deal in my life. I plan on continuing to work very hard and accomplish a great deal in my life. But I realize when I talk about myself people seem to think I am down or depressed. Not at all. I am a very happy and content person- again I have worked very hard to achieve everything and the life I live.

I want to be upfront and honest with people right away about who I am (I mean obviously) but I also do not want to come off as downtrodden or like I am complaining. What is the best way to get these facts across without seeming like I am ashamed of them?

My current girlfriend did. We both fit your description of yourself in your first paragraph except we both had previous relationships but those were mostly long-distance & we never did the dating thing. I lived with my parents till I moved in with her. Whereas she had lived alone for a year but was had major problem handling it due to emotional stuff like depression & anxiety. We both have various other disabilities as well some of which we have in common & some we don't. We actually met on this forum. I had made LOTS of posts on this forum complaining about being single but I also talked about the kind of person I wanted a relationship with & what I felt my relationship strengths & weaknesses were. Despite being an Aspie I think one of my biggest relationship strengths is being emotionally supportive & devoted but I do not go about it the typical NT way; I'm more direct, straightforward, & kinda blunt. Cass had joined this forum because one of her brothers had been diagnosed with Aspergers since he was little & Cass was wanting to understand him better & realized she's on the spectrum as well. She was planning to move back in with her parents due to her problems handling living alone but she kind of hated the idea of moving back in with them because the house was falling apart & her parents fought a lot. Cass read a lot of my posts & thought I sounded like a catch because I might understand & accept her better & she PMed me. I'm not really sure what advice to offer right now though. I do think there was lots of luck involved & I was on this forum talking about things for years.

Thank you so much for sharing. I would love to meet someone online like you did and start a relationship. That would be so amazing. Although to be fair if I ever do get in a relationship I am going to stay away from all social media as much as humanely possible. I only suffer through stuff like this in order to find the right person someday.

But thank you again for sharing and being so kind.

Since you seem to be the only person posting on here any advice on how to get women to like you or at least meet women on social media. I am certainly no fan of social media but it is the only way I am social right now so I have to work with what I can.

I am pretty open minded about the type of relationship I want. I have never been in a relationship before. Not even close. I have never had more than three conversations with a woman in person before. I am not really sure who I would match with who what kind of person I would work well in a relationship with. Right now my only standard is attraction. As long as I am attracted to someone and they are talking to me I will give them more than a chance.

It may or may not work out. But I am more than willing to give it a try. Maybe after a few tries I will have a better idea what type of person I should look for in a relationship.