Is it weird I feel I don't ever deserve sympathy from anyone

Page 1 of 1 [ 3 posts ] 

catpiecakebutter
Pileated woodpecker
Pileated woodpecker

Joined: 13 Feb 2020
Gender: Female
Posts: 189
Location: Canada

Yesterday, 11:02 pm

I feel because of big mistakes I make and have made in the past I should never get any sympathy from anyone. Is that a bad thing?


_________________
Use she/her pronouns when talking about me


squeeker
Toucan
Toucan

User avatar

Joined: 16 Feb 2007
Age: 35
Gender: Female
Posts: 258
Location: Canada

Today, 12:31 am

I think maybe that might be a problem at times, yes. I think it's not weird to have feelings about it, but I think it's probably not healthy. But I also think I have had similar feelings at times. Many times, I will think about mistakes I made long after the situation... and if I think that they are the cause of some other problem I am experiencing, I probably will feel guilty accepting someone else's sympathy or concern for me.

Ideally, I think it's healthier to forgive ourselves for mistake we made, remembering we can not change the past. But instead, work on understanding why the mistake happened, because then, at least for me, I think understanding why something happened helps me figure out how to minimize the chances of it happening again.



Mona Pereth
Veteran
Veteran

Joined: 11 Sep 2018
Gender: Female
Posts: 9,078
Location: New York City (Queens)

Today, 1:00 am

Everyone makes mistakes.

Probably most people have made at least a few big mistakes. Doesn't mean they should never get any sympathy from anyone.

What matters is whether you can learn from your mistakes.


_________________
- Autistic in NYC - Resources and new ideas for the autistic adult community in the New York City metro area.
- Autistic peer-led groups (via text-based chat, currently) led or facilitated by members of the Autistic Peer Leadership Group.