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Message |
Forum: Social Skills and Making Friends Topic: Bullying and the Effect of such. |
| Dentu |
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Posted: 09 Jan 2010, 6:58 am
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Replies: 15
Views: 2,580
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| Have you been bullied? During my elementary and middle school years, though it completely dropped later. Did such a bullying make you mad? Mad never crossed my mind. I was frustrated, depressed, and wanted to know why, but never mad. If so, what did you do about it? Took it. Almost all of my classma... |
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Forum: Social Skills and Making Friends Topic: Do people often act like you're invisible? |
| Dentu |
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Posted: 08 Jan 2010, 12:08 am
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Replies: 36
Views: 9,560
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| When people snub me, I get really indignant. I've burned some relationship bridges down because of this. It's a bad habit. A story- I was hanging out at the local diner with some friends, something I do every now and then since one of my friends works here and his job tends to be boring. We're havin... |
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Forum: Social Skills and Making Friends Topic: I always end up becoming the beta of a male social group |
| Dentu |
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Posted: 07 Jan 2010, 11:44 pm
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Replies: 23
Views: 3,619
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| I crack jokes and use sarcasm like a venom whip. It keeps me from being a beta. In exchange, I am monstrously hard to approach. The girls that like me divert their eyes and never talk to me, apparently thinking I can get snappy. Guys that want to be friends tend to become sycophants. It's not pleasa... |
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Forum: Social Skills and Making Friends Topic: Do you secretly know you're doing the wrong thing socially, |
| Dentu |
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Posted: 07 Jan 2010, 11:37 pm
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Replies: 22
Views: 4,714
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| I think that aspies end up being hated because they want to be liked and admired so they might go on and on about something they're good at without realizing that the people around them are not good at this. Others might see this as spite work when it's really not. The aspie wanted their admiration... |
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Forum: Social Skills and Making Friends Topic: Help...I need social advice! How do I be a good person? |
| Dentu |
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Posted: 07 Jan 2010, 11:30 pm
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Replies: 4
Views: 971
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| That's a difficult situation. As with anything related to complicated relationships, the answer can be difficult. I think I'd go with 'Honesty is the policy'. You truly want to help this girl, right? But certain unique functions of your psyche make this difficult? Over years of practice and therapy,... |
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Forum: Social Skills and Making Friends Topic: Alienated |
| Dentu |
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Posted: 07 Jan 2010, 11:10 pm
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Replies: 9
Views: 1,441
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| The problem is I don't want to change myself to become "normal". Not only is that practically impossible, it would also feel like I'm betraying what I am. All I care about is to change just enough to be able to not only get a girlfriend but also keep one.... but any woman who doesn't love my quirky... |
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Forum: Social Skills and Making Friends Topic: "Normal" people are stupid... |
| Dentu |
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Posted: 07 Jan 2010, 3:49 am
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Replies: 64
Views: 11,958
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| I tend to talk forever. It's a trait that's not only a part of Asperger's, but inherent in my family line. I know neurotypicals can't stand it, so I consider this sort of thing to be a kind of 'hijacking', and the closest indulgence I have to sadism. Bare with me, indeed. I try to spike up what I ta... |
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Forum: Social Skills and Making Friends Topic: Alienated |
| Dentu |
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Posted: 07 Jan 2010, 3:41 am
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Replies: 9
Views: 1,441
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| There's no easy answer. Even neurotypicals have trouble defining 'normal'. I spent several years of my life not understanding it, living as a social outcast, hating my life. It's a bad place to be. Worse still, this was before my diagnoses with Asperger's several years later. So I didn't have a reas... |
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Forum: Social Skills and Making Friends Topic: Do you have a code you live your life by? |
| Dentu |
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Posted: 07 Jan 2010, 3:28 am
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Replies: 34
Views: 5,468
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1.) Remember the humanity in others.
2.) Be prepared to admit defeat.
3.) Enjoy everything. |
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Forum: Social Skills and Making Friends Topic: Cure for Social Anxiety? |
| Dentu |
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Posted: 03 Jan 2010, 1:55 am
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Replies: 24
Views: 4,900
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| I understand where this is coming from. Enough to break a couple months worth of lurking, anyhow :P Asperger's (and general autism, for that matter) doesn't necessarily cause social anxiety, but it's like a cocktail of happenstance just waiting to blow. We're socially awkward, have trouble communica... |
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Forum: Social Skills and Making Friends Topic: On these messages boards, why is there... |
| Dentu |
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Posted: 16 May 2009, 4:23 pm
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Replies: 35
Views: 3,483
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| Ah, the religion debate. An endless cycle of theory and objectivity. Both sides would like to point out the hypocrisies and perceived wrongdoings of each other, and both often end up right and wrong with similar success. The problem is that neither side of a religious debate is willing to yield. It'... |
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Forum: Social Skills and Making Friends Topic: Are you supposed to get depressed if you can't make friends? |
| Dentu |
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Posted: 16 May 2009, 3:53 pm
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Replies: 9
Views: 3,260
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| When I first got to high school I was super moody and wanted to be left alone more than anything. I sat alone at lunch every day. This was before I was diagnosed with Asperger's too, so I had no 'excuse' for being anti-social. Then a bunch of annoying classmates started pestering me about how I shou... |
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Forum: Social Skills and Making Friends Topic: When U told people about ur AS, what response did U get? |
| Dentu |
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Posted: 16 May 2009, 3:24 pm
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Replies: 43
Views: 4,851
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| I rarely get flack about it. A friend of mine will sometimes joke about my insane focus whenever I start beating him at video games, saying "I swear to god, I'm gonna find the cure!". Then our other mutual aspie friend heard that once and flipped. He's kind of a lot worse at controlling himself. Per... |
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Forum: Social Skills and Making Friends Topic: Some of my best friends are animals... |
| Dentu |
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Posted: 15 May 2009, 10:48 pm
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Replies: 19
Views: 2,189
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| My cat Putter's my little buddy. I helped raise him ever since he was a kitten, and he's adopted a lot of my quirks. He doesn't like a lot of people, he has strange ways of showing affection, he's sorta lazy, and he's deceptively clever. He follows me around a lot and we have little conversations in... |
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Forum: Social Skills and Making Friends Topic: Sunglasses. Do you feel different behind them? |
| Dentu |
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Posted: 15 May 2009, 10:01 pm
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Replies: 11
Views: 1,704
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| I don't like wearing sunglasses. Besides the aggravating pinching feeling on my face, I know that one of my greatest strengths in social situations is to lock eyes. I practice a lot in the mirror to try and convey warmness, understanding and good humor through my eyes. Wearing sunglasses is like wor... |
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Forum: Social Skills and Making Friends Topic: I'm Not Witty Enough |
| Dentu |
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Posted: 15 May 2009, 2:56 pm
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Replies: 13
Views: 3,672
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| It's an Asperger's thing. We don't have the social antenna to tell what everyone around is feeling, so we mix up their emotions and can very easily be offensive without meaning to be. Wittiness is another factor that gets lost on us, since it involves playing the social field. It's a real pain. Ther... |
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