Have you ever been patronized, and if so how often?

Page 1 of 2 [ 21 posts ]  Go to page 1, 2  Next

Emor
Velociraptor
Velociraptor

User avatar

Joined: 27 Jan 2009
Gender: Female
Posts: 464

31 Jan 2009, 10:29 am

People usually patronize me outside of my normal class, due to me being socially inept at times and being terrible at PE.
One of the worst examples was when someone in the bottom class advised someone to help me keep the score in a game of rounders(English version of baseball, basically), or when people thought I'd lost count of the score in badminton and started to add 2 points to their score every time a point had been scored, or the hundreds of times in tech' when people asked me highly inappropriate questions in regards to me and my ex, or the 50+ times when someone's tried to, 'help' me in PE(it'd unbelievable how many times people have claimed they're trying to 'help' me by shouting commands at me or such, when I'm actually perfectly happy[or WAS until they started to interfere]...).
So, yeah, I'd just like to know if aspies get patronized a lot, because 2 years ago it got to the point in school where so many people HAD patronized me that I just thought everyone was, and I'm not sure if I'm just returning to my paranoid self... :P.
Thanks for reading and look forward to your replies,
EMZ=].



Orwell
Veteran
Veteran

User avatar

Joined: 8 Aug 2007
Age: 34
Gender: Male
Posts: 12,518
Location: Room 101

31 Jan 2009, 11:13 am

Ah, the misery of dealing with the university's disability office. It doesn't get any more patronizing than that. Which is really quite annoying, as they've seen all my test scores and know that I am intellectually their superior.


_________________
WAR IS PEACE
FREEDOM IS SLAVERY
IGNORANCE IS STRENGTH


MONKEY
Veteran
Veteran

User avatar

Joined: 3 Jan 2009
Age: 31
Gender: Female
Posts: 9,896
Location: Stoke, England (sometimes :P)

31 Jan 2009, 11:22 am

I get patronised alot by teachers at school. I have an "IEP" and I get 3 targets each term which are really stupid, a couple of years ago one of my targets was "to form appropriate relationships with peers" and that was the time when I had the most friends!
And alot of teachers talk down to me in this soft voice. the other week it was parents evening and the english teacher said "you got a C which is good considering" CONSIDERING?? what a cheeky sod, yes I have promblems with being organised but that is just patronising.


_________________
What film do atheists watch on Christmas?
Coincidence on 34th street.


Orwell
Veteran
Veteran

User avatar

Joined: 8 Aug 2007
Age: 34
Gender: Male
Posts: 12,518
Location: Room 101

31 Jan 2009, 11:31 am

MONKEY wrote:
And alot of teachers talk down to me in this soft voice. the other week it was parents evening and the english teacher said "you got a C which is good considering" CONSIDERING?? what a cheeky sod, yes I have promblems with being organised but that is just patronising.

Ugh. The voice they use is often the worst part. When people talk down to me like that, I feel like either smacking them or pointing out "I'm autistic, not ret*d; you can speak normally."


_________________
WAR IS PEACE
FREEDOM IS SLAVERY
IGNORANCE IS STRENGTH


WhiskeryBeast
Yellow-bellied Woodpecker
Yellow-bellied Woodpecker

User avatar

Joined: 27 Sep 2007
Age: 42
Gender: Female
Posts: 52
Location: Reno, NV

31 Jan 2009, 11:34 am

I get this the most at work. I work with a younger girl who is a paralegal, I'm just a legal secretary. She knows about my Asperger's, and I have tried hard to explain to her that it does not affect my intellect, in fact, quite the opposite. She never misses a chance to tell me how socially inept I am, how sloppy I am at dress and social manners, and how little common sense I have. It makes me really mad and frustrated.


_________________
The rose and the thorn, and sorrow and gladness are linked together.


Emor
Velociraptor
Velociraptor

User avatar

Joined: 27 Jan 2009
Gender: Female
Posts: 464

31 Jan 2009, 11:37 am

I rarely get the voice, but another guy who I'm pretty sure has Autism(he shares the same TA with me anyway) gets it all the time from our Maths teacher.
At our disability office, however, one of the teachers always speaks like she's speaking to 3 year olds... it's really annoying.
I also get taught to like an idiot in PE, as I've probably stated, and been called ret*d various times.
EMZ.



Cadzie
Pileated woodpecker
Pileated woodpecker

User avatar

Joined: 23 Feb 2007
Age: 46
Gender: Male
Posts: 187
Location: Ontario, Canada

31 Jan 2009, 11:37 am

I have alot of people, well talk down to me, at work one of the servers kinda taunts me, but I think it's his way of being friendly. Another example is some people will talk to me like I'm 5 years old, when I'm 31... like this "ok Andrew, that's nice...etc"



Emor
Velociraptor
Velociraptor

User avatar

Joined: 27 Jan 2009
Gender: Female
Posts: 464

31 Jan 2009, 11:41 am

Cadzie wrote:
I have alot of people, well talk down to me, at work one of the servers kinda taunts me, but I think it's his way of being friendly. Another example is some people will talk to me like I'm 5 years old, when I'm 31... like this "ok Andrew, that's nice...etc"

Once I was talked to like that for a whole lesson, and the worst thing was I only noticed after around 10 minutes what they were doing... Which tends to happen a lot, lol.
EMZ=]



Cadzie
Pileated woodpecker
Pileated woodpecker

User avatar

Joined: 23 Feb 2007
Age: 46
Gender: Male
Posts: 187
Location: Ontario, Canada

31 Jan 2009, 11:48 am

Emor wrote:
Cadzie wrote:
I have alot of people, well talk down to me, at work one of the servers kinda taunts me, but I think it's his way of being friendly. Another example is some people will talk to me like I'm 5 years old, when I'm 31... like this "ok Andrew, that's nice...etc"

Once I was talked to like that for a whole lesson, and the worst thing was I only noticed after around 10 minutes what they were doing... Which tends to happen a lot, lol.
EMZ=]
yeah I was in a car with a lady who picked me up for a computer camp, for people with learning diabilities, 10 mins into the car ride I realized she was talking to me, slowly and such, like it was kids show... and I said, why are you talking like that?



ToadOfSteel
Veteran
Veteran

User avatar

Joined: 23 Sep 2007
Age: 36
Gender: Male
Posts: 6,157
Location: New Jersey

31 Jan 2009, 9:34 pm

I get patronized by half of the love and dating forum on a regular basis when they go "oh, you'll find someone eventually"...



Meteorshower
Emu Egg
Emu Egg

User avatar

Joined: 2 Feb 2009
Gender: Male
Posts: 5
Location: Shetland

03 Feb 2009, 6:23 pm

I got told by my English teacher last year i'd be lucky to get a C... She kept dismissing whatever I said when I didn't agree with her analysis aswell.

But I got the last laugh when I got my exam results :D



Emor
Velociraptor
Velociraptor

User avatar

Joined: 27 Jan 2009
Gender: Female
Posts: 464

03 Feb 2009, 6:30 pm

Meteorshower wrote:
I got told by my English teacher last year i'd be lucky to get a C... She kept dismissing whatever I said when I didn't agree with her analysis aswell.

But I got the last laugh when I got my exam results :D

XD, awesome. What did you get? :D.
EMZ=]



Meteorshower
Emu Egg
Emu Egg

User avatar

Joined: 2 Feb 2009
Gender: Male
Posts: 5
Location: Shetland

04 Feb 2009, 12:08 pm

Emor wrote:
Meteorshower wrote:
I got told by my English teacher last year i'd be lucky to get a C... She kept dismissing whatever I said when I didn't agree with her analysis aswell.

But I got the last laugh when I got my exam results :D

XD, awesome. What did you get? :D.
EMZ=]


86/100 for Higher English, highest in my school 8)

That's an upper A for people who have a different school system from me



Nim
Veteran
Veteran

User avatar

Joined: 7 Sep 2008
Age: 39
Gender: Male
Posts: 3,510
Location: Away

04 Feb 2009, 11:46 pm

All the time.



CRACK
Veteran
Veteran

User avatar

Joined: 2 Nov 2005
Age: 37
Gender: Male
Posts: 765

05 Feb 2009, 6:41 pm

Yeah I got patronized by a few teachers in high school. And some students were fiercely protective of me at the instant that somebody even made a slightly offensive remark towards me.

I haven't told anyone in College about my AS and I'm not registered at the Disability Office for anything. All seems to be well and good now. So I intend to keep it that way.



d057
Veteran
Veteran

User avatar

Joined: 26 Nov 2008
Age: 31
Gender: Male
Posts: 504
Location: Pittsburgh, PA

05 Feb 2009, 10:17 pm

what does patronized mean?


_________________
Living my life one day at a time.