my 10yr son - UK mum
Hope someone will understand & help me help my 10yr aspergers son, i said to him the other day "grow up" and act your age, as he seems to be going through a phase of toddler again (silly gar gar language and squeaky noises plus the tantrums again big time which i havent seen in ages) Then the next he seems to act way beyond his years - which totally confuses me. I think he is confused about how he should act, how do i show him or tell him, or does he not want to let go of his early years, i think the school transition he has to make within the next year is troubling him, but i cant seem to get him to tell me whats going on in his head. As usual if he gets this wound up about things - im the verbal/physical punch bag! Does anyone have similiar situation? or been there seen it done got the tshirt?
thanks
Gah! I hate it when that happens. I've had problems with Rocky, Imran and Matthew. They seem to think that they can get away with anything and they do too. Whenever someone moves to discipline them, they pull [that card.
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About him being immature I would suggest relaxing about it... yes yes I know that sounds weird but if he isn't hurting anybody or himself there isn't any inherient problems with it. I still quite often times act immature (heck I still sleep with a teddy though if you tell anyone that your a dead women! :-p) and it annoys my mom (and even more so my dad, though he doesn't get aspergers at all... somewhat because I haven't tried to explain... I will have to soon his pride is much greater then I thought it was, aka he won't talk to my mom about it) but honestly I am not hurting anyone, I am still getting good grades (heck I just survived a term in Korea with little problem), and I am still normal. If your son is like me and a couple of other aspies around here (Jammie springs immedately to mind) he probably just sees being immature as a comfort thing and he will grow out of it or he won't. If it is seriously getting to the poing where you need to change it make it so he can act immature in private or around you and will act mature at school, thats the only way I think you should change it.
As for the being violent part... no clue that is something that you have to ride it out even more so on and I know thats hard. Feel free to PM me with any more question I am the UOPHA after all .
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"we never get respect ... never a fair trial
[swearing removed by lau] ... as long as we smile"
Im tired of smiling.
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It's no use telling him to act his age because he won't understand. It is too general a concept. If you told him of specific behaviours that you don't like, he might "get" some of it but it's probably best to ignore most of them (apart from the hitting, which should be stopped)
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Break out you Western girls,
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Hi i know exactly what your going through, i have an 8 year old boy who likes to hang on to his baby toys and is very immature the squealling and the language that you expect to hear from a 3 year old. and then sometimes he talks about things i dont even know anything about like you said beyond his years. It is confusing for us but just imagine how they feel , the frustration of knowing that they are different, My son asks me why he is different from everyone else, he knows. It breaks my heart, i also know what you mean about being the mental and physical punching bag, its not easy i hate to see what happens when he gets to be 13. I get scared just thinking about it. you can pm me anytime i will be happy to share some stories with you, sometimes it helps to talk with other parents.
Blankets suck teddies rule!
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"we never get respect ... never a fair trial
[swearing removed by lau] ... as long as we smile"
Im tired of smiling.
Vote for me in 2020
Maybe instead of resisting against his childishness. Indulge it, I don't mean be patronising I mean pick him up and say he's mummy's little baby and give him a tickle and a kiss etc like when he was five. We all have moments where we need to be
babies or live in the past. Buying age appropriate clothes may be an adult example of the same need. Resisting something isn't always the best way of removing behaviours etc. Validate his need.
Chris.
when my kid is really feeling tense she acts like a dog and barks jumping around on all fours or a cat.
It used to be more in shops i noticed also it got even worse when people where disaproving of her by staring in discust but i didn't mind it she stops doing stuff like that when she is comfortable.
I have a daughter that is 10 years old,she is non-verble, and when she was 8yrs she started to become really agrressive and uncontrollable, i dont know why and still donot,all i know is she didnot start dong that until she hit purberty,she is currently in a bevavioral hospital where they are helping her with her meds.i just thought it would be good for me to share some of my pain ,confusion with others.