Don't Say "Gay!"

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One of my gay friends was prone to fits of road rage in which he'd yell at other drivers "Get off the road, you stupid fa***t!" I found it amusing. He was flaming gay and proud of it and often indulged in derogatory remarks about other gay "friends," like "[so-and-so] is such a f*cking ret*d fairy," etc. I called him on his use of the word "fa***t," to which he said, "Oh, it's ok. I'm gay. It's different when WE say it. But YOU can't say it," pointing to the fact that I'm straight and as such it would be an obvious insult.

On the other hand, he was just as much up front about how he felt about my opinions as I was about his. I got called an "ignorant breeder" more times than I cared for and I never once reciprocated, but merely laughed it off. And there was a lot of hate speech regarding other equally or less knowledgeable "breeders." I have to hand it to him: at least he was an equal-opportunity gay bigot.

It's kinda like how if a white person says "n!gG3r" it means one thing but different if a b1@c|< person says "niggah"--it's ok.

Let's be honest here: No derogatory language should ever be used anyway. But if you're going to ban "gay," then what else are you going to ban? We'll also have to stop saying the word "Mexican." I wasn't as green at my second teaching job in a minority school, but one time I was trying to be politically correct when I'd already backed myself into a bad corner; my students gave me permission to say "b1@c|<" and that was what they liked to be called. But there's this paranoia about what you can/cannot say. What's really funny is when you catch the students picking on each other and you hear something like; "Guh!! ! Shuddup, b!tch! You iz TOO b1@c|< ! !!" The n-word is off-limits by default, but we probably should get rid of "black," and "Mexican," also.

During my brief career in the private schools, I'd hear a girl of Pakistani heritage tell a Chinese boy to quit being so Asian. And I taught a Chinese girl who had a fat phobia and corresponding deep hatred for all overweight people, including myself.

So, here's a good start at a list of words we can't say anymore:

1. Gay
2. Black, (ooops, I meant "b1@c|<", but just in case there's any confusion)
3. Asian
4. Chinese
5. Mexican.

#5 probably more appropriately belongs after #2, but I didn't have any particular organization in mind. It might seem with #3 and #4 that Asians are over-represented, but the list is far from complete. I'll leave it to the opinions of others as to how we should expand it in the future.

So really your friend was an entitled little toerag who hated the opportunity of an equal playing field. He could fire heterophobic insults at you but you couldn't retaliate with homophobic insults.

What an absolute knobhead he sounds.

Either it's a level playing field or it isn't. He's one of those people who wants preferential treatment.

I was for the most part neither here nor there on his views. I can vaguely understand why he'd feel differently about other gay people using gay slurs. I was feeling lukewarm on whether I actually sympathized, but I wasn't going to go to any trouble to controvert it.

But turning around and calling you "breeder" as a slur? For serious? I would have said, "what kind of ret*d fairy bullcrap is that?" and proceeded to give him a rather tartly worded lecture on showing respect for others and why you shouldn't whitewash people. Don't take that crap lying down, you damn wimp. Did your mother keep you on the Carnation too long?

you said sausage eater twice

Why would you ban the word Mexican ? it is no way a slur.

and he didn't say fudge-packer once.

rump ranger, Nancy boy, and proper English gentleman were also noticeably absent.

The point is I think is not to stop saying gay to describe Gays but to stop using it to describe things you do not like.
Tom is Gay. <-- not offensive if you mean Tom likes dudes.
Tom is Gay. <-- Offensive because you mean Tom likes Nickleback.

Ah, so when people say that Newt Gingrich is "gay", they mean that they don't like him.

Whereas when people say that Rush Limbaugh is gay, it is merely a statement of fact, even though he is grumpy all of the time.

Oh, for the day when humanity has evolved past its collective fear of words...

It could go the other way aswell, with 'Gay' being used in the second manner and the first fading away. Which would be amusing considering the word's original meaning.

Yes saying Rush is Gay is not offensive if what you mean is that he enjoys the touch of a man
on his repugnant flesh however implying that any man would sleep with him is deeply insulting.

AWwwwww!

Boo, friggin, hoo!

He calls Angelrho a "breeder".

Thats almost as bad as having a baby hit you with a rattle!

Taken out of the context of the Gay subculture the term "breeder" is too nonsensical to be insulting.

if it will shut him up, I'll give him a mouth full of sausage.

lol

I thought it was funny. There's no point in getting upset over things like that. I suppose it would have served him right if I'd called him out for being a hypocrite...but you called it: "as bad as having a baby hit you with a rattle..."

From the little exposure I've had to the "gay subculture," that's only a tiny part of the irony that pervades it. And if you don't know what I mean by that, just consider the mental image of the disparaging terms we've been discussing here.

And...that's probably all I should say on the matter. I'm surprised this thread hasn't been locked already.

Oh yeah...IN BEFORE THE LOCK!

It's kind of a new thing now to call someone you don't like "a dirty Mexican." Or anyone who has a darker skin complexion or remotely Latino-looking is a "Mexican," and it doesn't matter if they're actually from Lake Titicaca, Nicaragua. Generally it's just a reference to anyone Latino regardless of where they are from and is tied to any number of stereotypes.

I also knew this guy from Panama early in my college days--it turns out his mother was really bad news and he was adopted by a foster family. He turned out to be a real piece of slime, too, but occasionally someone would ask him if he was a Mexican, and he'd get furious about it. Apparently he couldn't even handle having a Latino background because he swore his last name was Italian, not Spanish. And there were some teachers that constantly mispronounced his name, which also infuriated the guy. Dude seriously needed to lighten up.

But if he got called a Mexican, whether intentionally or even just by accident, his head would just about explode.

I suppose it's the same as if you called anyone from eastern Europe a Polack. And once I asked a Scandinavian girl if she was from Sweden. Turns out she's from Norway and many Norwegians where she came from hate Swedes. So to be called a Swede is also an insult.

I honestly don't understand it. Some of us white people get called "redneck" by people trying to insult us, but the real rednecks out there wear that badge with honor.

I have been admonished by church leaders for using the word "Fundie" in reference to those who hold fundamental Christian beliefs.

It was a proud moment for me.