People with depression

Post Reply New Topic

It comes off as passive aggressive to me, how they close everyone off and don't want to talk to you and ignore multiple attempts to try to reach out to them and get all angry and defensive about it. "Well some days I just don't want any contact with the outside world!", I've been told furiously in my inbox by friends with depression. However, it hasn't been just days. Its been over a week., I feel like saying, "well f**k you. I just wanted to see if you were alive or not cause you haven't answered my calls in a f*****g week." I don't though, because of how emotionally fragile they are in that state, and I try to play it cool and remind them I care about them.

I am open to and accept the idea that it's awful to lose a family member to suicide.

Sometimes people don't even get that from their friends. Sometimes you feel very alone.

Yeah, I felt depressed summer before 8th grade (no idea why) and so my friends hated me in 8th. So I didn't have any friends until 11th grade. Sure I had acquaintances, but so what?

What I hate about suicidal depression is a lot of my friends have it. They're gonna off their selves and leave me behind with a bunch of as*holes. Say what you will about depressed people, but the real people ruining the world, who should put a bullet in their own heads for the sake of humanity, are too in love with their selves to ever put their selves out of their own misery.

That's why i love my suicidal friends. They get me on some level, and they're just going to up and decide to take an existential leave of absence to where I get left behind with a bunch of ass holes who don't get me at all.

Last edited by JNathanK on 21 Mar 2012, 10:17 pm, edited 1 time in total.

And you're generalizing, patronizing and pointing fingers. Those bad depressed people, how dare they be so selfish! Why can't they just see that other people have it a lot worse?



Consider this: they're not being aggressive at all. They're trying to prevent more pain, for example from being told to "snap out of it" or that they "have it so much better than the poor children in africa".

Again that is what depression does, being critical for a depressed person for having the obvious symptoms of depression wont do much good.

I'm not saying they're bad. Its just the behavior angers me, and its one more thing that's wrong with the world. I don't hate people with depression, anymore than I hare people with cancer.

JNathanK,
it sounds like you're just frustrated because you want to help them, but they're not seeming to let you help them. It's sometimes hard to "let others in" when one is very depressed.

But, please try not to judge them. Please know that no one wants to feel that way.
If you're around them and have tried to cheer them up and have talked to them, then you may not even realize that you may have helped them already.

This sounds nothing like depression. So comes off as , but totally different. Depressed people don't project it at people.

They getting angry & defensive because your poking them with a stick.

Seems like the only one been passive agressive here is totally dif person.

I wish I could make a magic wand and make it all go away. Its like some mystical curse. My frustration is like that of doctor trying to resuscitate a cardiac arrest victim. "Wake up damn it!!" I think the little things matter though. At least I've tried, and I'm doing my hardest not to outburst or anything or emotionally over react. I'm trying not to be overbearing and to just stay cool, but, yah, I'm very frustrated.

I don't know how to respond to that. Ok, fine, I misunderstood the behavior. It just came off as kind of passive aggressive, the way I was being ignored and pushed into a bad place emotionally. To me suicide, seems like the ultimate form of passive aggression, because of the way it works on you. You're not being harmed directly by the act, but you're still harmed in a kind of passive way. I almost feel like the suicide victim is punishing everyone else around them. That's just how it feels to me. I don't know how it actually is

I don't think its constructive to throw this term "passive aggressive" at each other like were doing though.

I probably don't get people with the condition, but they don't get me either. I'm a very direct person. If I call a friend or family member up, and this goes on for a week. I don't feel I'm being that over bearing. i think a true friend could talk to me for a few minutes and reassure me.

The psychology is probably more complex, but this is how I simply feel about it. Were here to educate each other though.

Last edited by JNathanK on 21 Mar 2012, 11:27 pm, edited 1 time in total.

Well I imagine you can't help how you feel, but keep in mind depressed people cannot necessarily do that either.

fair enough. Its all just one giant mind f**k. I don't know what's wrong with this world. I wish I could make it better.

Last edited by JNathanK on 21 Mar 2012, 11:32 pm, edited 1 time in total.

Well you say it's only been a "week" so just be patient. When they're ready they will contact a person. But keeping a open hand, but don't poke. Like a dog if you lean into it wrong & it starts grrring, you know to step back.

When they are ready. They will move on, or start talking.

But 1 week is not really that long is it now?

Well I haven't talked to them for a month, but I've been trying to get a hold of them for a week, and they gave me this message where they sounded annoyed. I just wanted to talk for a few minutes is all, not for several hours or anything.

I'm not saying I'm pissed off at them specifically, but what angers me about the condition, is its those downward spirals that they shut everyone out that they kill their selves in. Its the hopelessness in it I don't like.

Its like, I kept calling, cause I was f*****g concerned, and then I get a message where they sound pissed off at me, when all I was wondering was if they were dead or not or if they lost their cell phone.