stupid family ruined vacation plans (vent)

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I had been saving up to surprise my friend with a week long vacation to Disney World and Universal next month as a gift for him since he's about to finish grad school. I told my family about my plans and instead of getting complimented on that fact that I was capable of such a kind act, they criticized me and questioned whether or not I just wanted this trip for myself. That was already bad enough but then a few weeks ago, my dad dragged me to the bank and took everything out of my banking account to add to my Roth IRA. I know there is a minimum but he insisted on putting the maximum amount which even my bank account didn't have enough to cover. He had to pay for the rest.

It made me so upset and bitter but my dad was just going on and on about how I was going to have all of this money when I retire and have no one to take care of me. I didn't have the courage to tell him that I have ZERO intention of living to retiring age. I am looking forward to dying in my 40s or 50s at most and given my health I may end up there.

Originally my dad offered to pay for the vacation but he made me so angry with all of his criticizing and taking out the money, I will have to cancel altogether. It's not a gift from me if my dad is going to pay for it and it's already too late for me to plan out the vacation at the right time that would work financially (and put in my 45 day notice at work). If my dad were to cover the vacation it would have to be bumped up to June or July when the prices will skyrocket and my dad is such a cheapskate, he would not be happy about doing this. I can't decide which I am angry about more, the fact the he took all of that money out for a wasteful purpose or that he criticized my well-intentioned plans to begin with.

You are 29 years old.

You go right back to the bank by yourself, take YOUR money out, buy your tickets, set things up with your friend, get vacation time approved at your job, and say NOTHING.

The morning of the trip, have your suitcase packed, maybe waiting at your friend's home, and go.

Unless there is a lot more actually going on here.

Does your family have bad feelings about your friend? Do they mistrust him?

Why are you living under their control? Do they resent any independence?

Why did the bank allow a transaction with someone obviously being coerced?

Why would they be concerned if you spent your money on a special trip for yourself?

If your health is that serious, if you really believe you will not reach old age, why are they not wanting you to be happy while you can?

Have you considered a life on your own?

Sylkat

I have something similar. My parents are always wanting me to save for when I retire. However, the truth is, just like you, I don't intent to live until I retire. I don't want to live to a ripe old age. I want to die when I'm 50 at the maximum. True, perhaps I'll never get to see everything I want to see or do everything I want to do, but I definitely don't want to live a long life, either.