Do you feel more like males than females?
While I don't believe that there's a large enough difference between males and females psyche wise to give this much meaning, I have always felt more different from other NT females than from other NT males. The things that tend to interest them never seemed worth a second glance to me, and I know that a lot of it comes from societal influences, telling males and females what they should or should not do/aspire to etc, but still I could relate more to males. Still can I guess in many ways, but rather than viewing that as 'feeling' more male, I just class it as being unburdened by expectations normally lumped on females.
I don't feel the obligation to spend large amounts of time in front of a mirror, perfecting my appearance for the pleasure of others for example. Not to say that I don't like to look good, but more that I don't feel pressured to look like the 'perfect' woman, so I just go with what /I/ like. I've never felt like I had to be demure either, or hide my opinions.. which isn't to say I'm pushy, just that I know what I like, and I'll stand up for what I believe in. Most other women around me don't seem to do this for some reason.
It's had negative effects as well though, because apparently people just aren't used to a woman who's genuinely happy with their physical appearance, and takes offense whenever anyone suggests that due to my sex I may not be able to do the things a man could do. Their opinions normally change when I bring them down to the stables, and ask them to throw a bale of hay up to the loft though. They usually start whining about their poor roughed up hands while I take over. ;P
When I was a child, I was not very feminine at all- not quite a tomboy (active in sports etc) either though. It's only within the last few years that I've started wearing "girly" colors and clothes- like floral prints and dresses. On the outside, I am clearly a woman but inside though, I would say that I am neither male or female. I just "am"-- if that makes sense. Now that I think about it- it seems that a lot of my identity is not based on how I feel but rather on what society tells me- for example, my age. I have never felt a certain age-- I just am who I am in that moment. I mean, I have the maturity level and mindset of someone twice my age but I've never felt like I was 25 (whatever it means to be 25). The same goes for gender too.
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--Nyx-- What an astonishing thing a book is. Across the millennia, an author is speaking clearly and silently inside your head, directly to you... Carl Sagan
I wonder if feeling an association with a certain gender has anything to do with that personality trait that MBTI categories call Thinking/Feeling. I saw some stats by gender (sex) once, and while the other traits were split pretty evenly, T/F correlated strongly by sex. Also, there's an unfounded stereotype that men are more likely to be introverts. It does seem like autistic folks are more likely to be IxTx than the general population (even taking in to account that we're more likely to be male than the general population), but I don't have any good stats on that.
You aren't alone. No one feels like a girl, because girlhood is neither itself a feeling nor characterized by any particular feelings.
It's true that girlhood is neither itself a feeling nor characterized by any particular feelings... But that doesn't mean that no one feels like a girl. Lots of people feel like girls. If no one ever felt like a particular gender, transgender people wouldn't exist.
I have definitely always had more close male friends than female friends. I get tired very easily of how some NT women play mind games. I feel like I also don't have to use a social filter as much around guys, but that could also just be the kind of guys I'm friends with.
I think overall for me it ended up being a good thing. My best friend ended up becoming my boyfriend
Males are easier to talk with... I can go sit at a bar and talk about sports or world events. We dont even have to make eye contact! With women, I can talk easier with them now (in my 40's) than when younger, but need alone time after bc I find it exhausting.
I always thought it was bc I was a tomboy, but now I think I thought myself a tomboy bc I didnt know how to style my hair, what makeup looked best etc like other girls, nor was I interested in gossip talk or analyzing why this person did or said something.
Also, now that I am older, I know that although I can talk more easily with men, I do not understand them anymore than women... they are simply easier to be around in a social setting.
I've always gotten along better with males than females and had interests that some would call masculine. I think the reason I'm more comfortable in a group of males is they're more prone to using logic while female groups lean towards emotion.
I hear my brother and his girlfriend getting into arguments, and she argues from an emotional standpoint while he argues from a logical and statistically standpoint.
The females I know also tend to follow sensational headlines without looking into why the headlines are made and how they have little to do with what actually happened and use sweeping generalizations which are misleading.
I have always felt more comfortable around boys/men. I enjoy stylish clothing but cannot tolerate jewelry (except earrings) and so I don't even wear a wedding ring. As for makeup I have always kept it to a minimum. I think I have always felt uncomfortable around girls/women because of the drama and cattiness.
I feel feminine but relate better to males.
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"Dogs have owners, Cats have staff"
Aspie Score: 137 out of 200
Neurotypical Score: 67 out of 200
Diagnosed "genuis, borderline autism" at the age of 24 months
Level 1 Autism DSM-V
xxZeromancerlovexx
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Joined: 24 Jul 2010
Age: 30
Gender: Female
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Location: In my imagination
I get along better with guys. I don't feel like a guy though. Like I still feel female, but not like the first thing that comes to mind when I hear the word feminine. I'll wear a dress every now and then, but I like loose fitting jeans and t-shirts way better because I can sweat and get food on them and not really care. I don't do my hair. I just wash it every other to two days, leave in some conditioner and put it in a side pony tail. I have long hair and it's way easier to deal with than short hair.
I'm pretty much done with makeup because I have oily eyelid and primer melts into my eyelashes so mascara is the only thing I was wear nowadays.
My overall interest are more "guy oriented" if you want to associate gender with video games and sense of humor.
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“There’s a lesson that we learn
In the pages that we burn
It’s written in the ashes of the fire below”
-Down, The Birthday Massacre
I kind of feel like I'm somewhere in between. I don't feel male per se, but I don't feel particularly female, either. I identify as female because that's the body I was born with, and I've never had the desire to start acting or dressing like a guy. I've always been a tomboy, and since girls' behaviour started to seem batsh*t crazy to me at around age 13, I started hanging out with guys more, and was way more comfortable around guys.
I have never been a girly-girl and the kinds of things that appeal to giry-girls have absolutely no appeal to me. I'm not afraid to get a little dirty.
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Your Aspie score: 159 of 200
Your neurotypical (non-autistic) score: 63 of 200
You are very likely an Aspie
I've always felt more in common with guys than gals. Part of it is interest. Part of it is, they can be so much more straightforward than women and I can be blunt without them taking it the wrong way. Also, women/girls can be so tactile, always reaching out to touch your arm or give you a hug or a pat, and with my tactile defensiveness, it feels like I'm being beaten. I cringe when they come near me. Some assume it's because of something that was done to me in the past, but it's because of what is "done" to me in the present. Touch can be very painful, and women seem to love to touch each other over every little thing.
Also, girlie things never had much appeal for me. My aunt gave me a vacuum cleaner to play with when I was little, and I promptly took it apart to see how it was put together. Not sure I got it back together properly. I probably lost interest, when I saw how it all interconnected. The dolls I was given as a young girl were interesting in their construction - how the arms and legs were made to rotate without falling out... how the hair was made to lengthen or shorten. EasyBake ovens fascinated me, only because I couldn't figure out how they worked. Once I saw the lightbulb inside and realized they came with special mix, the mystery was gone. So simple. Disappointing.
I've often been mistaken for a man. Especially in winter, when I am bundled up against the weather. I don't move like a woman -- I have vestibular issues, so I have an odd gait and posture that doesn't look very feminine.
I studied gender pretty intently, around 15 years ago. Lived "as a man" for about four years. Realized that none of it was taking me in a direction I wanted to go. So now I just am.
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It's just me.
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