Creepy Women....

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I think the reason for all the confusion about "creepiness", however it is defined, between the genders, is that it is defined differently, or more vague, by men than by women. It appears to me to be a term that men (a bit of generalizing for the sake of argumentation never hurts), solely attribute to men - because they've been taught the most prevalent female definition of it - which in almost all contexts is about males.

Men (again a bit of generalization), usually never use the term about women, simply because they don't get approached as often as women do. It stems from an old "norm" in society that men are supposed to approach women, not the other way around. The woman has to play her cards really badly (or particularly deliberate) in order to come across as creepy to the average man.

In another thread, there was an example presented about unwanted attention expressed something along the lines of: "how would you act, man, if a homosexual man was standing uncomfortably close to you and you told him to remove himself, and he still stood uncomfortably close to you and started touching you etc. and later, he found out where you lived and stood in your garden trying to catch a glimpse of you through your windows?"

Well, I think the example is rather unfair. If a woman took the homosexual man's place, chances are the man would simply invite her in for "a cup of tea". (Unless, of course, he'd be sufficiently far away from the standard I'm trying to describe.)

Simply put, I don't think it's fair to get angry with men just because they don't immediately grasp the concept of creepiness. We think differently about a lot of things, and assumptions of anything else can be, and often are, very wrong.

I thank the OP for this thread, because it's been enlightening on so many levels.

The reason I have been called creepy is because I was Gothy at times, (still am really). It had nothing to do with sexual advances. In fact, I have never hit on anyone. So I have to agree that we used the term differently. OF course, the Mary Kay women are creepy because they make other types of unwanted advances in order to build their MK empire.

I get creepy when I like someone.

That would not come across as "creepy" or "scary" to me. It's what you might call a "pseudo-creepy". While many people may mistakenly think it's "creepy" it's really just eccentric. The truly "creepy" people are the ones that make the hairs on the back of your neck stand up.

As for statement 1, the US Bureau of Justice statistics show that only 26% of rape is stranger rape. The percetange of rape by a current or former sexual partner is also 26%. The number of women raped by a friend or acquaintance (also often called "date rape," although "acquaintance rape" is more fitting) is the highest, at 38%. The remainder reported rape that falls under the category of "another relative." As you can see, by the statistics the US Bureau of Justice collected, most rape survivors are in fact raped by someone they know.

As for 3, no, I have no stats. I'm not even sure about how to go about gathering them. I thought this was common knowledge, so I'm ashamed not to have facts on hand. I do remember reading somewhere that convicted rapists talked about the power and sense of dominance they felt, not about a desire for sex. I'm going to try to find something to support this, because I believe it is true. I've just heard it over and over!



I said no such thing! I never said rape was uncommon, and I'm not at all sure how statement 2 would imply I thought that. Like you, I know women who have been through harrowing experiences. I bet many people on this board know someone who has been sexually assaulted in some way. I am not trying to invalidate anyone's assault or any stalking incident. I know that rape is all too common, as well as under-reported. All I am saying is that most men do not assault or stalk women.

I know for a fact some people find me creepy. More on the internet and usually losers.

In real life i'm so loud it doesn't really fit in with the whole "creepy" personality type (Quiet people) but when I don't know how to act it can and probably is seen as creepy.

Consumed topic

i was one of those. It stopped at menopause, but I wish it had stopped sooner. i think it had something to do with hormones and AS. I envy women who did not gave to go through this. What a waste of years fighting it, and yes \i had to fight it or the consequences would have been awful.