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smudge
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16 Oct 2015, 12:12 pm

I just don't think you've encountered enough women bosses. They can be horrible, with all that cattiness and bitching just as much.


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The_Face_of_Boo
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16 Oct 2015, 3:05 pm

smudge wrote:
I just don't think you've encountered enough women bosses. They can be horrible, with all that cattiness and bitching just as much.


Oh come on, lemme retain some good faith in the human race.



whatamess
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17 Oct 2015, 12:10 pm

Well, geez, except for the lesbian part, I could've written your post myself :-) . I have had more male true friends than women my entire life, exactly for this reason. However, at the same time, I am very much a woman who expects and demands equal treatment for women. But yes, some feminists hate me as well because well, I am NOT biased against men. For example, at work I had a few female co-workers tell me they would be wearing a low-cut blouse to an interview to get the job because the guy liked b$%bs...when they didn't get the job, they attempted to claim it was because they were women they didn't get it and some even attempted to claim sexual harassment. Funny, I looked pretty decent at the time, much better than some of those women, yet I never had any man at work disrespect me or sexually harass me.

I have pretty much given up on having a group of women whom I can relate to. I have maybe 3 girlfriends whom I adore, who get me, who are just like me. The rest? Forget it. I am not going to bother anymore. None of these friends are in the same country I live in today, so normally I am alone with just my husband and son. It's hard, but little by little I am getting used to it. I'd rather not have any girlfriends to hangout with here, than have those type of friends.



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17 Oct 2015, 12:22 pm

Luthylou wrote:
Thankyou for all your positive replies, this was all very difficult to write. It's just a very sad irony that I've experienced so much patriarchal nonsense from women and so little from men and I can't explain that to other women and be taken seriously, or met with hostility as is more usually the case. I realise that autism is the missing link and my experience of sexism is through a lens of not understanding gender expectations or understanding the behaviour of others. It still baffles me though at the age of 23 that women continue to terrorise me for being different, and I can't bring it up without being met with yet more aggression. I'm glad no-one's yet told me to 'go hang out with those men you feel so safe around' through barred teeth (I keep half expecting it.) Thankyou for being a safe space for me here, guys.



PS I am 47 and at the age of 47 women continue to terrorise me for being different...it doesn't change...not one bit



The_Face_of_Boo
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17 Oct 2015, 5:17 pm

...and how do you not expect men to whine about women in L&D? You still wonder why eh? look at your own posts here, seriously; everyone of you is basically saying that 90% of your surrounding women are terrible match for you :lol: One terrible bad experience after another. None of you has a positive experience with women in general!
However, the difference is, that we are often obliged to date out of the majority of women to find one acceptable - while your friendship with women is much easier to be disposable and to befriend men instead.

Look, everytime you feel "offended" from a man complaining about the majority of women in his surrounding , before you jump to his throat to call him misogynist, go back to this thread to refresh your own memories with women.



dianthus
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17 Oct 2015, 5:34 pm

The_Face_of_Boo wrote:
...and how do you not expect men to whine about women in L&D? You still wonder why eh? look at your own posts here, seriously; everyone of you is basically saying that 90% of your surrounding women are terrible match for you :lol: One terrible bad experience after another. None of you has a positive experience with women in general!
However, the difference is, that we are often obliged to date out of the majority of women to find one acceptable - while your friendship with women is much easier to be disposable and to befriend men instead.

Look, everytime you feel "offended" from a man complaining about the majority of women in his surrounding , before you jump to his throat to call him misogynist, go back to this thread to refresh your own memories with women.


Who are you addressing this to? Has someone in this thread said that they expect men not to whine or complain about women?



Amity
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17 Oct 2015, 5:41 pm

The only thing I wonder about is when the L&D crowd don't differentiate, and instead make blanket
statements and assumptions about women in general. To me it is the equivalent of placing all the lonely guys in the same category as the bullies, abusers and womanisers and just using the term 'men' for example. I hope that you can notice that the words, some, many etc are used in this thread and not the black and white percentages that you refer to.

FoB wrote:
...and how do you not expect men to whine about women in L&D? You still wonder why eh? look at your own posts here, seriously; everyone of you is basically saying that 90% of your surrounding women are terrible match for you :lol: One terrible bad experience after another. None of you has a positive experience with women in general!
However, the difference is, that we are often obliged to date out of the majority of women to find one acceptable - while your friendship with women is much easier to be disposable and to befriend men instead.

Look, everytime you feel "offended" from a men complaining about the majority of women in his surrounding , before you jump to his throat to call him misogynist, go back to this thread to refresh your own memories with women.



The_Face_of_Boo
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17 Oct 2015, 6:29 pm

dianthus wrote:
The_Face_of_Boo wrote:
...and how do you not expect men to whine about women in L&D? You still wonder why eh? look at your own posts here, seriously; everyone of you is basically saying that 90% of your surrounding women are terrible match for you :lol: One terrible bad experience after another. None of you has a positive experience with women in general!
However, the difference is, that we are often obliged to date out of the majority of women to find one acceptable - while your friendship with women is much easier to be disposable and to befriend men instead.

Look, everytime you feel "offended" from a man complaining about the majority of women in his surrounding , before you jump to his throat to call him misogynist, go back to this thread to refresh your own memories with women.


Who are you addressing this to? Has someone in this thread said that they expect men not to whine or complain about women?



Oh ...a lot of ladies did that on L&D to a lot of guys did that for years, it's time to counter-attack :lol:. I've never been that active on this board before.

From now one, every time I see a lady who is criticizing men on L&D about how much they whine and complain about women, I am gonna reply her with a a link to this thread and with some like "Before you patronize us, go see your own gender here how much they complain about women".

/ anyway...go on with your posts, this thread will be...very very useful.



The_Face_of_Boo
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17 Oct 2015, 6:36 pm

Amity,

Oh...and are you seeing they are differentiating much here?

The female users here are saying "women are..."... "I've experienced so much patriarchal nonsense from women " ..."I'm a bit afraid of women too."....etc

These are snippets from some posts here posted by women.

And oh, believe me, using 'many' and 'most' didn't save the guys on WP from being accused of whining or misogyny.

So Amity... "Before you patronize on us, go see your own gender here how much they complain about women". :lol:



Amity
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17 Oct 2015, 6:55 pm

The_Face_of_Boo wrote:
Amity,

Oh...and are you seeing they are differentiating much here?

The female users here are saying "women are..."... "I've experienced so much patriarchal nonsense from women " ..."I'm a bit afraid of women too."....etc

These are snippets from some posts here posted by women.

And oh, believe me, using 'many' and 'most' didn't save the guys on WP from being accused of whining or misogyny.

So Amity... "Before you patronize on us, go see your own gender here how much they complain about women". :lol:

Cherry Picking from some posts, it's a cute attempt to make your point :lol:.
Oh FoB, I don't believe that I have ever patronised you or the hoards of men that you speak for... Or is this a case of being lumped together with those who have patronised you about misogyny, simply cuz I'm female...
Image
Good luck with your fishing :jester:



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17 Oct 2015, 7:51 pm

Boo what you are writing is that you feel entitled to be provocative any time a woman complains about women.

Or did I misunderstand what you meant?



Last edited by Waterfalls on 17 Oct 2015, 8:06 pm, edited 1 time in total.

Waterfalls
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17 Oct 2015, 8:02 pm

The_Face_of_Boo wrote:
However, the difference is, that we are often obliged to date out of the majority of women to find one acceptable - while your friendship with women is much easier to be disposable and to befriend men instead.

I understand you aren't having good experiences with women, however, this reads as pretty demeaning. You might have better luck with women if you were able to look at us more positively.



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17 Oct 2015, 9:10 pm

...



Last edited by sly279 on 18 Oct 2015, 12:47 am, edited 1 time in total.

wilburforce
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17 Oct 2015, 9:18 pm

sly279 wrote:
I was told saying a bad thing about even one woman is same as saying bad thing about all women, so most, some, in my area, doesn't matter if you talking bad about any female regardless of if she is bad it's misogyny apparently.


Why are men coming in to this thread to discuss things that aren't what the OP is about? Can we have a discussion in here without it being derailed into other topics by men, please? If you want to talk about misogyny, then talk about it in one of the many threads about that topic, not in this one. If you have nothing to contribute to this particular discussion about being an autistic woman in woman-only spaces and feeling unsafe or like you don't fit in, then don't contribute by derailing.



whatamess
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17 Oct 2015, 11:45 pm

By the way, I used to hang out with my boss who was a male and he used to laugh and say that anytime we went out together, girls would come and give him their number or smile at him, etc. but when he went out alone, it hardly ever happened. My husband also says the same thing...that while he didn't have a wedding ring, most women didn't pay attention to him but once he had a wedding ring, they were all super sweet to him and hitting on him. I have seen in the last few years a few of what I thought were my girlfriends (obviously not), make completely inappropriate comments to my husband right in front of my face. Some are constantly telling him how nice he is, telling me how lucky I am and one even dared ask him to go to a concert with her because she didn't want to go alone. That last one I thought was a young girl, i.e. about 15 years younger than us and we were friends with her parents...that didn't stop her.

From what I have talked with my husband and many of my male friends, most men if their friend has a girlfriend, is married, etc. they respect their friend and their wife (no, not saying some men don't actually look at their friend's wives/girlfriends, etc...) but that they do NOT bother or would consider starting anything with them...on the other hand, I have seen TIME AND TIME again some girls who have absolutely no problem dating their girlfriend's husband and if they like the guy, the friendship is irrelevant to them.

I think because of this women are even MORE cruel to AS women, because they are indeed always in a competition with women and of course, as AS women, we are easier targets to bully, etc.



wilburforce
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18 Oct 2015, 12:45 am

whatamess wrote:
By the way, I used to hang out with my boss who was a male and he used to laugh and say that anytime we went out together, girls would come and give him their number or smile at him, etc. but when he went out alone, it hardly ever happened. My husband also says the same thing...that while he didn't have a wedding ring, most women didn't pay attention to him but once he had a wedding ring, they were all super sweet to him and hitting on him. I have seen in the last few years a few of what I thought were my girlfriends (obviously not), make completely inappropriate comments to my husband right in front of my face. Some are constantly telling him how nice he is, telling me how lucky I am and one even dared ask him to go to a concert with her because she didn't want to go alone. That last one I thought was a young girl, i.e. about 15 years younger than us and we were friends with her parents...that didn't stop her.

From what I have talked with my husband and many of my male friends, most men if their friend has a girlfriend, is married, etc. they respect their friend and their wife (no, not saying some men don't actually look at their friend's wives/girlfriends, etc...) but that they do NOT bother or would consider starting anything with them...on the other hand, I have seen TIME AND TIME again some girls who have absolutely no problem dating their girlfriend's husband and if they like the guy, the friendship is irrelevant to them.

I think because of this women are even MORE cruel to AS women, because they are indeed always in a competition with women and of course, as AS women, we are easier targets to bully, etc.


I hope you're not trying to suggest that men don't try to hit on women in relationships, that only women do that to men, because I'm pretty sure that both men and women do that and that both men and women cheat on their partners, as well. This thread is getting off track--I don't think these were the kinds of things the OP had in mind when she started this thread. I could be wrong, however, as she hasn't commented in a while.