Erm...this is about periods, female replies only please...!

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*Cough*
This is rather embarrassing...Sorry if this all TMI...if you're male then please stop reading here!! !!



I hate my periods. Hate hate hate them. I am extremely sensitive to pain. I can hardly walk when I have a simple menstrual cramp. I have very little body awareness and if I start during the day I do not always notice and it makes a heartbreakingly humiliating mess. I cannot use tampons because they scare me and I can't figure out how to use them This means I use period pads. I am always moving around and changing positions, and they don't make pads long enough, so I always have to choose whether I risk blood spill at the front or back. I have tried using two pads at once to stop this but it was very uncomfortable and made me walk funny. So I don't have any clothes because they are all in the wash. My bedsheets need to go to wash every night, too. Also, I don't know how often I am supposed to change a period pad. I either dash to the toilet every 5 minutes or forget completely and end up messing myself even more. All of this makes me feel disgusting. I cannot go out in public on my period in case someone sees. My parents go to work and I am left alone for a very long time, so if I have a period I will run a very very cold bath and sit in it for a long time...anything up to 5 hours. The bath is cold because I feel the need to punish myself, and the longer I stay in the bath, the longer I avoid having to wear clothes and mess myself.

I've been having periods since I was 10 and a half. I'll be 16 on Sunday. Is there something wrong with me? I thought I would be used to them by now.

I hate them so much I am trying to stop them. I heard that eating too little or being overweight can contribute to periods stopping, and since I am already overweight I have started a 500 kcal diet in the hope that they will stop.
Is there any other way I can stop them?
Contraceptives perhaps? (Although that's really not the route I want to go down)

I don't know if that's the answer, maybe I need more education?

I don't know what to do I hate being female

Help!

Annelie

Last edited by AJCoyne on 02 Jun 2009, 6:33 am, edited 1 time in total.

Annelie, I'm sorry you got the crappy end of the spectrum when it comes to periods. My grandmother had crippling periods, had to stay home from school, in bed all day a few days each month.

To answer your question, the birth control pill is probably your ticket to some relief. You don't actually have periods on the Pill; you have "breakthrough bleeding" during the week you are taking the placebos. But even that can be avoided if you take a pill variant that is continuous hormones with no "break week." (The original Pill was like this, but women were apparently kind of freaked by not ever seeing blood and thus getting some sort of signal that they weren't pregnant, so the manufacturers / researchers / whoever came up with the "three weeks on, one week off" variant.)

There are downsides to the Pill, especially with long-term use (years and years), or if breast cancer runs in your family, but it may be something you want to investigate. Good luck!

ETA: you can get your family doctor to prescribe them for you for period relief, not just for contraception. I know some girls have gotten a prescription to help with acne control, too.

AJCoyne

Sorry to hear about your troubles.

Just a few suggestions, hopefully it is helpful...

With tampons I find they are miles better to use than pads and I never use pads any more myself. Once a tampon is in properly you just don't notice it is there. Have you tried using them? If so what was the issue? My sister had problems when she was quite young so my mother got her ones that had this tube thing attached to help insert them. I am not sure what it is called sorry but I think that helped my sister a lot. If you can feel a tampon when it is inserted, you have not pushed it far enough in and it will be really uncomfortable.

If you must keep using pads, check them every two hours or so, or more if it is heavy. Perhaps you could set a reminder in your phone (if you have one) so that you won't forget if you find yourself forgetting?

A diet to make you thin enough to have your periods stop is NOT healthy so I would not do that at all. I had a time where my periods stopped when I was anorexic. But I had tonnes of hair fall out, I would collapse, had all sorts of other health problems and I was permanently freezing. I spent time in hospital. So the other side effects DEFINITELY outweigh the benefits of your periods stopping. Don't go there.

Why do you not want to take contraceptives? I found that being on the pill was just awesome in regards to what it does to your cycle. For many women it makes things run like clockwork so your period falls every X number of days exactly. It also lessens cramps and can make your flow less. I loved being on the pill but had other side effects (awful migraines) so ended up on the mini pill. This pill means I only get my period every 2-12 months (usually around every three months but I once went a year without one). It tends to only last for two days and is very light though I do get terrible cramps, which had stopped whilst I was on the other pill. Anyway if you are on the normal pill you can skip your periods though I found if I did this a lot I would get breakthrough bleeding through the month but it was minimal. Also one pain of skipping your periods is that if you are sexually active you will probably need to do pregnancy tests regularly so you know if you are pregnant.

Anyway, don't feel disgusting about it, its just a natural thing that happens. *shrugs* Pain in the arse I admit but not something you should feel ashamed of.

I haven't really tried using tampons but...I just can't see how they would work I'm scared it will fall out or something. Besides, I really don't want to put my hands anywhere near there at that time, you know?

Um...me and my family...we are very...I don't know...distant. We don't talk about anything personal and I'm glad about that. I am a hermit with no friends so if I wanted to go on the pill my mother would have to take me to a Family Planning place, wouldn't she? I don't want that at all... It would make me feel so weird as well; being a virgin on contraception...looks like the pill is the way to go though...? Both replies suggest so...

Ok well basically with a tampon you just get it and push it up your vagina as far as you can fit it. If it is not far enough in you will feel it so if that happens just push it in a bit more. It sounds weird at first but it is really easy. Your fingers might get a bit messy but the mess will stay in there until you pull it out by the string, which you can do whilst sitting at the toilet so you won't get mess everywhere. If the string breaks (which has never happened to me in 14 years of periods) you can still get it out but you have to stick your fingers inside and pull it out, I tried this before early on just to make sure it was easy in case the string broke and yes it was. Here is a website I found to explain things better http://www.ehow.com/how_4493130_put-tampon.html and here is another one http://www.tampax.co.uk/how-to-use-tampons/. I haven't had one fall out, I doubt it would happen at all unless you didn't stick it far enough in and then you would feel it and it would be uncomfortable.

Anyway, then you just need to change it regularly just like a pad but it should be less likely to get on your clothes, it won't make you walk funny and so on. You can swim and ride and dance all that stuff they show in the tampon ads

With contraceptives. Where I live at 16 years old you can get it yourself as that is when I got it (as soon as I was allowed as I needed it for contraceptive reasons but came from a strict religious family so could not get it earlier). I hope it is the same where you live. Maybe book in to see a doctor by yourself and explain your situation to them and they will prescribe it to you. They should be very understanding towards you and not even raise an eyebrow at your request. A normal doctor should be able to describe it so I doubt you need to go to a Family Planning Clinic. Many many women are on it for period problems, rather than contraceptive reasons. Some people are on it for acne too, like my friend was when she was very young (and a virgin).

Good luck!

Hi I found another link with FAQs about tampons you might want to read http://www.beinggirl.com/en_US/articled ... tId=ART560

Thankyou for the links Saspie

Annelie, in my 30 years of using tampons, I've never once had the string break or anything, and my fingers almost never get messy. I use tampons with applicators (OB makes them, as does Tampax), a cardboard tube in two parts that you use to push the tampon all the way in without ever touching it or yourself once you get the hang of it.

When inserted properly (and this is really easy if you use an applicator, since you don't have to figure out how far is far enough; just push till the second cardboard tube is all the way inside the first one), you don't feel a tampon at all. Not in the least. You may even have to set yourself an alarm to remember to change it .

A big plus is that you stay much cleaner with a tampon than with pads!

You can buy "extra long" pads to keep from getting blood too much at the front or back. As for tampons, I don't wear them. I have the fear of them falling out. It may be irrational, but I still feel this way at 40.

I think going on the pill is the best way for you to go to stop the periods, so you only get very minimal bleeding. I hope you talk to a gynocologist in depth about your concerns.

oh, goodness, yes! there is a new product, called Seasonique or some such that limits to 4 periods a year! Unbelievable freedom compared to my own 46 years of 13 periods a year.

Annelie, I was scared of tampons at your age too, so don't worry . I changed to tampons because I hated sitting in pads all day eurgh!
I think tampon websites sometimes let you sign up for a free sample through the post. Make sure people are out the house so you feel comfortable and then pratice using them. They don't hurt at all and they make life so much easier, and the packs come with instructions too. Good luck!

Bodyform makes sanitary towels that are pretty big, http://www.bodyform.co.uk/Pages/Product ... uctID=1349 .
They're actually for nighttime, when you move around a lot... but you can wear them during the day as well. And they're quite comfortable.

You could pair the above with a smaller tampon if you want.
O.B. for instance makes mini tampons for when you're just starting to learn to insert them. You can get the normal ones, but there's also a type that's made a bit smoother to make everything go a LOT easier. They're called O.B. pro comfort.

It can take a long time before you get 'inserting tampons' right, but once you do it'll be so easy. And it's a lot more comfortable than wearing pads.
Though you could always wear a pad for extra protection, just to be sure, or if you can't get to the bathroom on time etc.
Just practice every time you get a chance and soon you'll get the hang of it:)

If you're worried about hygiene etc. just bring along a tube/bottle of sanitary gel, the stuff with alcohol in it which evaporates once you rub it onto your hands etc. That'll get rid of any leftover germs after you've washed your hands.


You could take a light pill to help regulate your periods etc.
I take one and I have my period once every 2- 2 1/2 months. It's a lot nicer 'cause I can also plan my period around a holiday or make sure I get it during a school break.
Though make sure you take a light one 'cause the heavier pills can make you depressed/give horrible mood swings etc.
Just talk it through with your GP.

But please get off of that ridiculously dangerous diet right away!
500 calories is WAY too little for a young woman like yourself. You need at least 1200 calories for your basic body functions.
And keep in mind that perhaps your period will stop with a 500 calorie diet, but everything else will too.

Eventually your organs will start shutting down to conserve energy, your muscles will be 'eaten' away by your body (and can you guess what your biggest most important muscle is?... yeah. You risk dieing of a heart attack), you'll have deficiencies up the wazoo which will diminish any energy you have left, you'll kill your metabolism, mess up your thyroid, hair will fall out, you'll always be cold, you'll probably get extra, dark hair growth on your back/arms/legs... a sort of fur coat your body creates to protect you, kidney/liver problems, dental problems, you'll look like you've aged 20 years...

should I continue or what?
Do you REALLY believe that suffering from that entire list is better than dealing with your period and staying a healthy, beautiful girl?
Because I really hope you don't. Please eat enough. Eat healthy.
Try upping your intake of whole foods (whole grains, bananas*, other types of fruit/vegetables etc.) a week or so before your period starts, usually it'll help lessen the cramps and the overall 'blah' feeling you get on your period. Stay away from refined sugars/flours/etc.


* For some reasons bananas really do the trick for me when it comes to beating cramps.
I'll usually make a smoothie out of it with fresh berries and orange juice:)

I've always been grossed out by my periods. Nasty business. I had to use pads also, I can use tampons but only for like 1-2 hrs if I really want to go swimming, other than that they irritated me and caused me cramps. I've got a heavy period too, so when they came out with the overnight style pads, I was so happy, made it so much easier.

I did pills, I didn't see where they made my periods lighter, just me heavier. I did Depo, and that made me crazy and depressed. I have two kids, now I use Mirena, I have no periods and it's been the best thing ever.

As for changing pads, I had the same problems in the begining, leaking because I would forget about it or not change it fast enough. I find that I timed myself, about every 2 hrs I would make a trip to the bathroom to check on things down there.

I can relate to everything you're saying there.
I changed to tampons a while ago because my periods are very, very heavy and the pads just couldn't cope. I used to have to change bedsheets and clothes every day too. Ew.
I now wear a tampon and a pad at the same time, for extra security.
They're scary at first but trust me, once you get used to them they're a lifesafer. They drastically reduce embarrassing leaks. It's also much easier and less painful if you use the applicator ones, and with those you don't actually have to put your finger up there. Start off with the smallest ones and then work your way up until you reach one that's suitable for your flow. Plus, they don't fall out because your muscles automatically close around them.
I still find periods incredibly uncomfortable, annoying and inconvenient, but tampons do make a world of difference. However, I don't understand how anybody could get used to periods and will probably continue hating and dreading them until they stop.
I tried pills but they just made things worse and I didn't want to go back to the doctors because I find going there embarrassing enough, so it's mortifying when I have to talk about that kind of thing with the doctor, especially with my mum there. Eep.

So basically I have to eat more, switch to tampons and talk to a gynecologist?
What an odd to-do list...T_T

Oh, period pain is the worst. It sounds weird, but one of the best things I've found is to put a hot water bottle on your lower back instead of on your tummy. It's like lots of the nerves are in your back and when you warm there the pain is a little easier to take.
Also, take pain relief before the pain starts. Like when you start to feel the slighest bit uncomfortable, start taking the tablets and get ahead of it. When the time that the pain relief lasts is up, take the next dose on time. Don't let it get bad before you do.
Panadol is fine, but try Ponstan or another kind made for period pain. You can get it over the counter in the pharmacy.

Tampons GRR. Have you tried using overnight pads during the day? They're longer and more absorbent. Pads tend to get changed every couple of hours, like two or four? *doesn't know exactly* But at least when they a bit soaked should do it.

The pill can help by skipping periods outright or lightening flow, don't feel embarrassed because some doctors even prescribe it just as an acne treatment. There's also Depo-Provera, which is like the pill but it's implanted in your arm to last 3 months. Both can cause a little weight gain, and aren't good if you have migraines, but if that's you talk to the gynecologist and get a lower-stroke-risk progesterone only pill.
You might also want to be checked for endometriosis which can cause pain, or fibroids which can cause heavy bleeding.

Buy many of cheap comfortable things like tracksuit pants in dark colours, that way you consistently have things to wear, with multiple items you can change without it being noticed by others, and you are able to do more frequent loads of washing.

Stuff the diet and the cold baths, periods are punishment enough! Please don't be embarrassed.