How Does Autism Appear To NTs

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This might be shocking to some of you but some of us NT's don't like to engage in conversation much with other NT's either. I just do it in the pursuit of things I need:

- friends
- sex/romance
- networking job opportunities
- someone to share a hobby with
- gain insight into a problem i'm working on or get help with something

I'm NT. I like to think I would try not judge someone who is Autistic because of their behaviour or how they communicate, etc. Some of my behaviour is also considered odd or eccentric due to mental health problems so I have been on the receiving end of harsh judgements at times. I only know two people who are Autistic; my best friend's Grandson and my penpal so I'm quite ignorant on the subject really. I came across this forum when looking up information on Asperger's.

I am NT. Friend has Aspergers. Most people have used the words "he's a nice guy but wierd" to describe him. What I noticed about him:

- Doesn't want to go anywhere*
- Doesn't want to do any new activities*
- Doesn't want to have experiences with new people*
* Can experience sensory overload or have a wig out if subjected to these against his will
- Wants to hit on my girlfriends and other peoples girlfriends / wives even in their significant others presence, particulary inclined towards touching to initiate this (autism hypersexuality / not understanding basic social cues)

I've done a lot of reading on his condition and started to understand it a lot more and believe 90%+ of the things he does that I find annoying are a result of his condition. I dunno honestly it gets on my nerves sometimes, and other times I feel sympathy for him. I am really bad about trying to get people to conform to my version of life and how I see life. Its a catch 22 really. I was socially inept and ugly as a kid so I had no experiences with new people, no parties or activities, didn't go to a lot of places. I became an adult and made myself social and beautiful (braces / contacts / teeth whitening / designer clothing / gym 1-2 hours daily). So its a catch 22 in that I know how he feels being lonely, but I want to live my life with new experiences of people / places / things and he can't many times because of the Aspergers.

Honestly I didn't know he had a literal condition for years, many years. He is very convincing that he is "normal with a few quirks" until you really get to know him and recognize the patterns. I'm not going to give up on him I mean I will still invite him to go places and get together unless he is blunt that he does not want to be friends. Our relationship is a bit strained right now I don't know what is going to happen.

As I am getting older, I am starting to see a pattern of ADHD with some autistic traits mixed in at times. This brings me to wonder, "what does autism really look like to a neurotypical person?" Would a person with mild autism (or autistic traits) generally seem awkward, simply very quirky or "nerdy", or maybe just seem slightly "out to lunch" (the latter has been said about me) or would NTs sometimes or often see a true social disability. I wonder, how these traits cause me to appear to others and this is why I am asking this question.